“God bless America”
I wonder if I’m the only one that finds this a bit rude and presumptuous. Commanding a god to do something when you are but a mere mortal never seems to be a good idea.
Cut it out, OK? I don’t want to peel your silly bumper sticker off your car, but I will if I have to.
The end, by freshmeat.
Um, what do you say when someone sneezes?
Bob Bless you?
“Lord, if it be Thy will, bless this person who has just sneezed; or, if it be Thy will, smite this person who has just sneezed; but in all things, Lord, Thy will be done, and none shall dare to question Thy justice and Thy wisdom. Amen.”
You kinda get funny looks when you use that one, though, especially in a work-type setting.
I’d like to have god in a cage. I could feed him bannana flavored pellets and make him dance.
I bet god could do a better jesus dance ™ than jesus could.
Comon on, try to send me to hell. I’ll take a few of you with me.
Peel the bumper sticker off my car, and I will stick it to your appendix through the not-fun-for-you route.
Don’t fuck with other people’s stuff, you will end up in a bad way.
MEBuckner - That is awesome - I love it! Now if only I can remember the whole darn thing the next time someone sneezes…
My great uncle used to feel the same way about those words. He always respected and liked Red Skelton for his parting words:
“…and may God bless…”
meaning, if he should take a hankering, I sure do hope God blesses everyone.
It’s not presumptious, nor pretentious.
Funny, I’m wondering if maybe annointing yourself as the arbiter of what [your deity here] thinks is rude and presumptuous is a bit rude and presumptuous.
And the correct statement to make when somebody sneezes is “Eww! Snot!”
But it’s not a command. As with most things theological, it has many layers, but bascially, it says that we know that God blesses America, because we’re big, beautiful, and above all we’re God’s f-cking people in the best God-damn country in the world, and if you don’t like it you can you-know-what.
Pardon me [sniff] I just got carried away there. Anyway, we’re Right (with a capital R) and that’s why God is on our side. (or vice versa.)
PC
Well, if you’re a Subgenius, yes.
Although it’s pronouced “Bob”.
Read a guest column in a news magazine (Time or Newsweek) a few years ago written by a woman who met Red after a performance. She came up to him, shook his hand, and said “God bless you, Mr. Skelton.”
His response: “No, no, my child. We must never assume God will bless us; we can only ask that he do so.” It reminded her that he always ended his shows with “…and may God bless.” Classy guy, that Red.
Spare me the self-righteous fucking horseshit.
Sam
“God Save the Queen”
Hmm … I thought the “may” was kinda implied.
“[May] God bless [object].”
Two other options in response to a sneeze:
or
Your choice.
People who tell God what to do make the baby Jesus cry.
Dammit. I thought I’d go for the quick jab, and MEBuckner comes through with the knockout punch. I’d have thought of something better than “Bob Bless you,” like “May the sprits of the upper respiratory maintain the clarity of your nasal passages.” Oh well.
[sub]Is a Subgenius one who writes with this sort of text?[/sub]
Did anyone else hear a whoosing noise overhead?
When people “God bless” my ladylike little sneezes, I smile and thank them, of course, after putting away my lace-trimmed hankie.
But I confess to be a bit gobsmacked by the recent blizzard of “God Bless America” signs metastasizing all over the place since the 11th . . . Can’t help but think of all the “Allah Bless Afghanistan” signs in THEIR country and wonder what’s the difference (“OUR knee-jerk religious fundamentalism is OK; it’s just YOUR knee-jerk religious fundamentalism that’s evil!”). Not that I would ever suggest anyone take their litle sign down if it gives them a warm fuzzy feeling . . . Just that some of us get a bit creeped-out by it, is all.
I’m a subgenius. Hell, I’m even a subnormal.
Not a subversive tho’. Can’t stand those subversives.