Student workers having sex in the library or Good God I HATE giving this speech all the time.

It’s a big campus. There are lots of hidden spaces, lots of restrooms on the top floors of multi-story buildings that are virtually empty after around 7:00 p.m. There’s a dormitory where guest are allowed 24-hours a day. Why the hell do these morons have to fool around in the library? It’s annoying and an arrest able offense. Okay, kids here’s a major lesson in the real world of work, you get caught having sex on the job, you get fired! Urgh! The freshmen are getting stupider every year. Sorry, just had to rant.

Throw the book at 'em.

Because it’s hot.

Don’t knock it til you try it. I have a few fond memories of the government archive section myself.

Yes, I highly recommend the Fine Arts Library at Ohio State. Those were the good ole days!

Just don’t crack the spine while you’re at it. So to speak.

Wait, are we talking homosexual relations here or the dirtier kind?

ZPGzealot wrote: “Student workers having sex in the library or Good God I HATE giving this speech all the time.”

Best username/post combo I’ve seen in a while.

It’s a library. They were checking each other out.

Even “American Pie” limited library scenes to concealed illicit prints.

Word. I assume the speech is about how they should always use a contraceptive.


Perhaps you need a metal pole to poke them with.

Was it full PIV or just some handshake hanky panky?

Come on Dopers we can handle this one w/o personalizing it.

As to the how come the same speech has to be given every year, well hey yes, the Library for some reason does seem to attract this sort of shenanigans. Don’t ask me why, it does. Maybe something in the mold from the old book collections. I was surprised how quiet some people can be at it (or how oblivious others are about just how noticeable *they *were)

HOWEVER yes those who are student*-employees* need to learn that when it’s your workplace it’s not the same deal. “We’re in college, it’s time to act up” does itself has its time and place and manner parameters. Try to sneak into the Dean’s office overnight or do it in the utility tunnels or something.

1978 McKeldin Graduate Library at the University of Maryland College Park. 11PM studying late very few people around. Go into the men’s bathroom on the 5th floor. 10 guys in the bathroom milling around! Holes drilled in the side of the stall. I’m being eyed like fresh meat. They’re waiting for me to make my move. I’m avoiding eye contact.

A proper Pitting on this subject requires a far more detailed, anatomical, and in some sense literary description of the offensive conduct in question. We all await, with open flie- with the utmost confidence in your expository talents.

Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell you, I gotta plead ignorance on this thing, because if anyone had said anything to me at all when I first started here that that sort of thing was frowned upon, you know, cause I’ve worked in a lot of offices and I tell you people do that all the time.

No, no, no, that’s not where you sneak into for sex; that’s where you park the horse.

Dude. Too soon.

#RIPTrooper #neverforget