Stupid criminals

From the “There’s a fine line between persistence and stubbornness” and “How stupid do you have to be?” departments–

Holy crap, that is one mean woman. Why wasn’t she at least, charged with attempted murder? The legal justice system is so broken in places. She’ll get some time in prison, for sure.

Rule No. 1: Never use an accomplice.

The first murder she contracted was intended for her ex-husband and his new wife. The guy she hired ended up going to the police. The second murder she contracted was the guy she hired for the first one. She got caught again. The third murder she hired was a witness and a lawyer from her second trial.

This woman really needs to put down the shovel.

Rule#2: Don’t ask a cell mate to help you kill someone. Never seems to work out.

I thought it was never allow an accomplice to survive. At least that’s the rule I’ve followed.

So I’m guessing “Don’t kill people you don’t like” isn’t Rule #1? :confused:

The first rule of any criminal endeavor is don’t get caught. Everyone incarcerated it this time failed that basic step.

Granted, there is a small percentage that are actually innocent, but that’s another discussion.

What she needs to do is find a random stranger on a train.

Nobody takes the train these days. Trains are now just meeting places for murder pact partners.

OK, I’m sensing a business opportunity here, for a brand new piece of smartphone software that will be a real “disruptor” of the whole “murder pact” business. We could pass it off as some kind of “ride share” or “carpool” service, but it would really pair up people with inconvenient friends, relatives, or business partners.

I think this could be a real…


I’m sensing a pattern here.

Whatever happened to leaving them a really scathing Yelp review?


You have to be kind of dumb to commit a crime and get caught and convicted. But you have to be really stupid to get caught and convicted when you didn’t even commit a crime.

No. As seen in countless movies, the first rule is “Don’t like people you are going to kill”. It just muddies the waters.

I misread that as “This woman really needs to put down with a shovel.” A sentiment I believe I agree with.

Sorry there’s no money it, because

Crime doesn’t pay:)

Well, yeah. The problem is that you are his accomplice. :wink: Could lead to some problems…

Listening to the internet feed of 6iX; they just had a story of a maid who stole a candle from her employer and lit said candle in her home. Candle turned out to be a firecracker and the maid is suing her employer for not marking it as such.