Very confidently ask for a “Large Coke, no cup.”
You can order a vegetarian burger at Burger King. There are two versions. One has a vege burger instead of the meat patty. The other is just a no meat burger (pretty good actually). It’s a toss up which one you get as the second doesn’t seem to be on the register, but it’s available.
OMG. I just realized what a Doner Kebab is …
The Chinese place I go to. I would LOVE to be able to tell them: “Just give me some beef in brown sauce and throw it over some fried rice.”
But for some reason, they don’t understand that. So instead, I have to go all Five Easy Pieces on their ass and say “Yes, I would like the pepper steak. No onions, No bell pepper.! $2 extra beef with fried rice please.”
*I do love me some bell pepper and onions, just no in my Chinese food for some reason.
The first time I ever smoked pot, back in the 60s, I went to McDonald’s and ordered a “ham jelly.” It took several minutes of questions and explanations before I got a plain hamburger. I wasn’t at all trying to be funny; I thought that’s what they were called. Then I sat down to eat it, thinking I was naked.
Happens to me regularly, since my wife and daughter often send me out to pick stuff up, but prefer to eat at home.
I have occasionally succumbed to the temptation and responded with a snappy answer along the lines of “No, I’m going to eat three full-size meals right here; what time do you close?” (at lunchtime). :smack:
But yours definately tops that.
Must be a generational thing; I thought of Popeye.
I actually know a woman who does this, and everyone at the restaurant hates her.
She asks for “extra” everything, “but not so much that you charge me for it.” Like, just a little more whip cream and strawberries on strawberry pancakes than they give everyone else.
You joke, but in some parts of the world to-go drinks actually come in bags with straws.
Host: “Do you have reservations?”
Me: “Yes, but we came anyway”. It just never gets old, except for the host/hostess who hears it 10 times a night.
BTW - back when I was in the biz, everyone was called “foodservers”.
I recall another that I saw on a numismatist board. One of the posters would go into McDonalds and order a meal, which cost a little under $3.50. He would pay with a 2.00 bill, a SBA dollar, and a .50 piece. The cashier would always be dumbfounded as to what the hell to do with them, as most coin trays aren’t set up for them.
That reminds me of the time I went to lunch with a friend to this Japanese place. He ordered his food first, then I said
“I’d like the same, but could you make mine a little bit better than his”.
The lady who takes the orders still remembers us for that.
You kinda didn’t follow up with the logical conclusion: “and we’ve already eaten, so I guess we’ll just have dessert.”
LOL.
Hey, I’ve always thought it should be spell “gno.”
Months, hell. I still remember that sketch and it’s been decades.
If the restaurant has a chalk or dry-erase sign near the entrance reading “Please seat yourself”, remove the second and third S so it says “Please eat your elf”
When encountering the modern version of “Can I get you anything else” (i.e. the loathsome question “How does the food taste?”), I have to this point resisted the temptation to reply:
“Too much fucking cilantro.”
I play a game when I go to a restaurant (fast food or otherwise), it’s called …
“Using manners”!