Submitted: I am the female Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor*.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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Okay, I am not real handy but I know some of the basics of how tools are supposed to work and some simple home repairs but it seems every time I do any of the repairs/improvements I make things worse or injure myself. My father taught me a few easy repairs and the swear words to go with them. I like tools, I can spend hours in Home Depot or Lowe’s looking at and coveting the fancy tools. I bought myself a set of power tools one Christmas and a Dremel for one birthday. But I am just not handy or handsome and even duct tape hates me.

There was the time I tried to hang a small wall cabinet in the bathroom and could not get the screw holes lined up, lost my grip causing the cabinet to slip down the wall and smash my foot which was sticking through a step on the step ladder I was on which then caused me to lose my balance and almost fall backwards off the step ladder. I managed not to fall but I injured both my foot and my back on that one, the double injuries make that one rather spectacular even for me. The cabinet never did get put on the wall, it sort of ended up in the garage smashed on the floor. It did not get smashed on the fall off the wall. I will leave it at that.

My recent attempt at home repairs involved re-screening my kitchen window screen. It was going well, I even put window film on the lower window while I had the screen out. But at one point I was kneeling on the sink to reach the upper part of the window and my legs were sweaty so I slipped and caught myself by grabbing the faucet, which caused it to bend and now there is a little hole in the faucet. If I turn on the water a little fountain will shoot out the top of the faucet. So I fixed this by wrapping it with electrical tape so the water just puddles under the faucet now instead of spraying everywhere. I can’t even feel a sense of accomplishment at having fixed the screen because now I have to fix the faucet and I shudder to think what sort of disaster will result. I can at least console myself in that I did not actually sustain any injuries this time around … except to my pride, of course.

Can anyone make me feel better with some of their own personal do-it-yourself disasters?
[sub]I think we’ve done this sort of thread before by search failed me and it’s probably been long enough that we should have some new disasters to share.

*For anyone who does not know, Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor was a character played by Tim Allen in the TV series Home Improvement. The character had a show about tools and home repairs and even though he was somewhat knowledgeable everything he attempted usually ended in disaster. Though part of that was because he often thought he could improve on the tools or repair methods by adding “More power! Ar ar ar!”. Although, I am not that obnoxious and wrongly confident in my abilities, the “ending in disaster” part often applies to me. [/sub]

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I think I love you.

:smiley:

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Last summer I decided to fix my leaky bathtub faucet. I went online and figured out how to replace the thingamabobby, went to the hardware store and bought the parts and the tool, and got to work. First off, I couldn’t figure out how to turn off the water to the house. And I thought, well let’s just see what happens if I take the knob off the faucet and replace it without turning the water off. Don’t ever do that. After finding the water turn-off under a cover in the yard (roaches- ew!), I proceeded to change the valve stem. I drop a couple of necessary pieces inside the wall from the hole where the stem sticks out. Oops. By now it’s been an hour or so, the water’s off, which means my house cooling system is not working, and it’s July in Tucson. I’m soaking wet, along with the whole bathroom, plus dripping with sweat, I’ve cried in frustration, and I’m pissed.

I go get my friend, who can’t see very well but is better at this than I am, because let’s face it, anybody is better at fixing things that I am, and we go to Home Depot and start all over. We easily get the job done badda bing badda boom, except I never did find the metal sheath that goes over the stem, so now I have just the bare stem sticking out. But the damn thing doesn’t drip anymore.

Whenever I have something minor like that go wrong, I always think, “Well, how hard can it be?” Some things, it turns out, are very *very *hard. But I do get a sense of satisfaction after fixing something all by myself (or with a little help).

4

I’ve got nothing - because I refuse to do stuff like that. Right now I have to find a plumber to come in and fix my kitchen sink - the cold-water handle broke off. Of course, it did that back in Jan…

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My landlord has a new electrician on staff. He’s hot. I have a premonition that I’m going to be having a lot of electrical problems in the immediate future, that I will not try to fix myself.

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I know my limits. I will never attempt anything to do with electricity. It scares me.

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I find that it saves a lot of money on perms, myself.
There are some things you can do yourself, like take breakers to the hardware store to get tested or replacing outlet covers (turn the power off first!) but mostly, yeah, you want an electrician. A hot one, preferably.

8

If your hands are bleeding somewhere or you have to go back to the hardware store because you broke something else that wasn’t part of the problem you were working on…

then you are doing it right!

9

Lets see, where to begin.

My 2nd car was a 1976 Rustang with a V6 and I decided to swap in a V8. Bought an engine and discovered the V6 air conditioner didn’t line up so I had to cut the bracket and have it welded. I bought the correct motor mounts and was lowering the engine down when I discovered there was a special oil pan made to clear the rack and pinion. Sigh… bought and installed the correct pan along with a splash pan which required special bolts meant for a 4 bolt main. They have a hole drilled in the end to accept another smaller bolt to hold the pan down. Dropped the engine in only to discover there was a special transmission housing and matching torque converter. Screw that, I made it fit. Everything was fine until I tried to install the headers which were designed for the special transmission housing. Screw that, made them fit. I pounded, bent, cut and otherwise mangled the headers into place. Fired up the engine only to find out the speed shop left out an internal oil plug which prevented the valve lifters from pumping up. intake had to come off to fix it. The transmission would not shift because some tiny part was missing so I had to remove the headers-from-hell to drop it and take it back to the shop.

When all is said and done the engine lasted 6 months when the special bolts used on the mains snapped because they were meant for a 4 bolt system and were too weak for 2 bolt mains. The main bearings spun/shredded and were picked up by the oil pump which froze. I think I got $20 for scrapping the motor.

That was only 1 project. Hope you feel better.

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On my latest bout with our furnace (don’t ever buy a house with a “hydronic” hot water baseboard heating system :frowning: ) I was doing good to get it back together working as well a sit was when I took it apart.

Our house has an oil-fired furnace which heats a big tank of water, which is then pumped around to baseboard heaters in each room. On our particular furnace, there’s a heat exchanger in the tank too, which supplies domestic hot water. The heat exchanger is mounted to the inside of a big plate which bolts over a hole in the top of the tank.

Still with me?

The heat exchanger was leaking at the gasket where it bolts into the boiler. Every year or two I have to shut down the system, drain the tank, and pull it out and replace the gasket. This year I broke a stud getting it off. Then I broke another stud putting it back in. Then after I had it all together and refilled and fired up, it leaked at one of my replacement studs. Then I accidentally ground a notch into the side of another stud while I was fixing that.

Got it all back together and the boiler drain valve leaked. Drained the tank, replaced the washer, and while I was at it, replaced the shaft seal on the water pump, which had been dripping a bit. Refilled the boiler, started it up, shaft seal still leaking. But I did fix the drain valve leak, so I’m declaring victory. :rolleyes:
Don’t even ask how repairing the wife’s toilet went. :slight_smile:

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I’m a reasonably handy female. I figure, hey, it’s broken anyway, and if it’s something I’d have to replace, I’ll try to fix it first (unless it’s something dangerous).

So, as a result, I’ve fixed many things. My Dad was a carpenter and so I learned a lot just by hanging out and watching him. I was also a big fan of the original version of Hometime.

A friend of mine wanted to tap my abilities when her husband went out of town for a conference. He was well aware of our plans and was fine with me doing whatever as I’ve helped her in the past by tearing down paneling in her living room and built a railing for her front porch and he was happy with the results. I’ve done other projects, but I can’t think of them right now.

One year, she wanted to put down some different tile in the bathroom and change out the toilet. No real big deal, I can help do that. I’d put down the self stick tiles before, it’s a small room, shouldn’t take long. I know how to change out the toilet. Never did it before, but it’s not hard – the wax ring is pain in the butt, but I digress…

Everything probably would have been just fine if we hadn’t also decided that the toilet’s shut off valve should also be replaced. It was frozen in the ON position, so in order to change out the toilet, we had to shut off the water to the whole house. We figured for future issues, it would be good to have it replaced.

Before attempting to do this, I asked my Dad if this was something simple to do. Now, my Dad is not one to readily say that any of his children have the skills to do something, so when he told me it was easy and I wouldn’t have a problem, I believed him. My mistake.

He left out one crucial, but tiny, detail. Check to find out what kind of pipes were used.

Let me say this – there’s a big difference between steel and copper pipe. Steel pipes are easy to change out, copper? Not so much for the inexperienced.

To make a long story short, in my attempt to unscrew the valve from the pipe, I broke the solder seal on the pipe under the house ('cause, see, copper pipes don’t generally get screwed together!). I saw my life flash before my eyes when the pipe came out of the wall in my hand.

Luckily, my friend’s Father-in-Law had been a plumber and was able to take care of the mess we’d made.

I doubt I’ll ever attempt another plumbing fix like that again unless I’ve researched it myself and know all the pitfalls first!!!