Francesca – I googled “market research Chicago” and found a company that does focus groups. Have you tried the phone directory?
Thought about bra modelling, Fran?
Exengineer - lno and Mr DeDay are both good friends of mine. Rue gets a pass because I know he’s an old, old man with only his dreams to comfort him. I am not so harsh as to deny a man that. On the other hand, “dorkus malorkus” is virtually a pet name for lno. I assure you they know I heart them both.
And as for dorkusmalorkusmafia. Well. Really. And that’s all I have to say about that.
Gundy - I have been working my google mojo and have come up with one or two possibilities and have put my name down for a reputable market research company. My main problem is that my nearest town is called Reading. Searching on “market research reading” isn’t exactly bringing up ideal results. But I’m getting there. I will try the phone directory tomorrow morning.
Nos - I knew I could rely on you. Meet at Marks and Sparks at two?
I like answering market research questions, too.
Oh! Oh that hurts! “Only his dreams to comfort” (it was only the one) and “old, old man”. Why, if I could find my cane I’d give you a whack with it Pu… no, now I think it’s Ms Francesca. Hrmph! How do you like them apples? (Mr. DeDay, indeed…)
Well now I’m not going to tell you my other ideas. And they were good ones too.
Busking. I thought you could busk. If you can play an instrument well enough for someone to throw tips your way. Or if you’re real bad, they can give you money to stop. Or you could sing or dance or something.
Or even Performance Art, if you have no real tallent.
Then I thought you could start a guinnea pig ranch in your own home. It would be most lucrative if there was a Peruvian restaurant in your neighborhood, but you could just go into the pet trade.
Think of it, free range guinnea pigs in your back garden.
But now I’m not going to say anything.
-Rue. (thinking of looking for a new Second Best Special Friend)
You summoned me, I provide. 
I suggest getting yourself hired at some fast food place that offers paid training. Sit through the training then quit. Go to the next fast food place and repeat.
For real. I plan on doing this myself as long as I can find a place whose training doesn’t conflict with my real job.
Then there’s always volunteering for medical research.
What about teaching folks about the best way to get value out of the net? You know, showing them how to search and use email and all that sort of stuff. You could offer it in-home or even perhaps sneak into a local library or internet cafe. Perhaps advertise this with an emphasis that you have sign language skills within the deaf community and otherwise drop leaflets where older folks hang out. There are so many folks who are scared of computers and the net who just need somebody to sit down and show them a few things to get them started. Not a true geek who speaks too fast and intimidates, just someone who knows what they are doing and where to find answers to questions and showing them how and where to ask.