My favorite from a boss long ago: “He’d better shape his ass up or he’s going to find himself kicking horse turds down the road.”
Depends on the person…
In the last “reduction of force” we had, two of my work friends were let go. The first I said “I’m so sorry” - her response “I’m not, I’m going to do daycare for my grandkids!” It was something we knew was coming, just not who would be affected, and she’d obviously already had the “if I get laid off” discussions. The second said “yeah, when they told me I was very sad, and I drove home and pulled over and felt…relief. I should have left a long time ago, guess I needed the push out the door.” (Both got a year in severance pay).
But yeah, when you aren’t expecting it, don’t have options, and/or don’t have a decent severance - “right sizing” feels wrong.
After a two-week probationary period, I was told by a manager that “I’m going to take you off the clock” (as in the time clock where employees were required to “punch in” and “punch out”).
Around here, you might be entered into the retain pool if your position has been eliminated.
Mainframe programmers may recognize what it means if your HR record has been scratched.
scratch = delete
I have no idea why IBM didn’t just use “delete” way back when.
After six months with one employer, she told me “I’m taking back operational control”. I was clueless as to what that meant. The HR guy had to come and tell me that I was “being downsized at the end of the month”.
Aussie must have good benefits, because when Bea Smith (double murderess at the time) was on work release, the business had a slow down so they had to stop having her come in.
“Given the arse”
Back when Nashua, a company who made ink ribbons and pressure sensitive paper and packed out toner cartridges, was operating a huge facility in Nashua, NH that was getting less and less huge as carbon paper was being phased out of use, they posted the names of people being let go on Fridays. They called it “White Out Friday” since it was happening so often they didn’t print new org charts, just white out names and kept going.
Future Endeavored.
As in the e-mail notice that goes out to the rest of the company when someone is no longer with the company that ends with ‘We wish so-and-so all the best in their future endeavors’.
Back in my days at Encom, we used to call it “being de-rezzed.”
Just as a point of curiosity, have you (or anybody you know of) had the words “with extreme prejudice” attached to your (or their) pink slip or notice of removal?
Were any of you escorted from the premises? By an armed person?
Anyone who has read the wonderful Then We Came to the End by Joshua Ferris will be familiar with, in addition too the ubiquitous “shitcanned”:
Walking Spanish down the hall
A phrase coined by the protagonists from the Tom Waits song.
Turfed.
No. But I’ve seen it happen to another person.
I knew a person who worked at a company where the boss would take an employee to the donut shop down the street to fire them. So ‘going to the donut shop’ meant you were getting shitcanned.
Once, when I was let go from Goodyear (long ago) a police officer (Goodyear has their own police force) escorted me to my car. He was apologetic, explaining that it was company policy. offered to help carry my box of stuff from my desk.
I was only ever escorted from a building once - i was a contractor who was let go. I was at least allowed to pack up my stuff and since I rode the bus to work, my account manager gave me a ride home.
I’ve seen some people who were escorted and then had their stuff mailed to them after the fact.
Being escorted out was SOP when I worked at the bank. Too many ways a disgruntled recently unemployed person could wreak havoc. Even people who initiated their own termination were escorted.
When I turned in my resignation, effective some 5 or 6 weeks later (I don’t remember now, it’s been 13 years), my boss said to me, “You know, normally, I’m supposed to go ahead and have security escort you out, but the fact is I can’t run this place for a month without you, so I’m gonna have to hold you to this effective date.”
It actually kinda felt nice to be told that. Not nice enough that I changed my mind, but nice. 
In several places where I’ve worked, this is SOP even if your departure is voluntary. Working with sensitive information or certain types of property, you don’t even give notice until the day that you intend to leave unless you have some vacation coming, although some of them will cut you a severance check.
Still, it can make you feel like a common criminal when a big, burly security guard watches you pack up your desk and proceeds to pat you down before walking you to your car.