I’m 31 weeks pregnant. I can feel the baby kicking. I’ve read from various books and websites that I am supposed to talk to her. The only thing I can think of to say to her is to comment on her kicking. It feels really, really weird to be talking to someone who I can’t see because she is inside me. I don’t know why this should be so much weirder than talking on the phone to someone I can’t see, or than talking to myself, but it is.
I’m afraid singing to her might fall under some kind of child abuse laws, with the quality of my singing being what it is. Though I do still sing along with CDs in the car, sometimes.
I didn’t talk to the Kiddo when he was in utero, other than stuff I would normally say out loud to myself or the dogs. I did not read to him or play special music for him. It all just felt weird and dumb to me. Fwiw, he’s turned out fine.
The things you read say you’re “supposed to” talk to her? That’s pretty silly to me. It might be good for her to recognize your voice after she’s born, sure, but she already will from hearing you talk to other people.
My “baby” is 12 so I can’t remember if I talked to her much or not. I don’t think I did though. I know I talk to babies a lot after they’re born, and I talk to pets…but yeah, I don’t think I have much to say to a fetus.
I did, at least once a day. Every morning in the shower I’d say, “Good morning, baby girl. How are you today?” and talk about all the fun we were going to have together, the kitty and puppy, that sort of thing.
At 35 weeks, I don’t know that I hold a lot if conversations with my fetus. I’ll talk to him when he’s kicking or moving - something along the lines of, “hey buddy, I’m really attached to that organ, so I’d appreciate you not kicking it into a puddle.” also, I work from home and spend a lot of time with no human company, so he gets the arguable benefit of me talking o myself more than most, I guess.
I do read to him, though - probably at least one book a day. I enjoy it (no word yet on his feelings about the matter) and find it calming. His dad also reads to him, and talks directly to him at night - the usual goodnight stuff, plus “good job kicking the hell out of mommy today” which probably sends the kid some mixed messages.
I chatted with Junior quite a bit - told him about how I was decorating his room, chiding him to quit jumping on my bladder because peeing 857 times a day was quite enough, discuss suits I was buying for him, etc.
I also made my belly dance a little - you know, grab it and wiggle it around saying ‘Dance, baby! Dance!’
I realize that this makes me sound like a lunatic (and I’m not ruling that out); however, when he was born via c-section, the doctors and nurses had to take him away for a little while to get him sorted, weighed, etc and he was screaming his face off the whole time. Eventually they came and laid him on my chest and he was still screaming. I looked at him and said ‘Hi there’ and he instantly stopped crying.
Personally, I think that’s because he recognized my voice from all the incessant chattering I did while he was still inside. I can’t really ask him, of course, but I like the theory.
FWIW, I also fell madly in love with him at that instant, which I’ve been assured is hormonal, but whatever. I think it’s because of his fantastic personality and rakish good looks.
You’re already letting what 'they" say you’re supposed to do make you feel guilty and inadequate. I say it’s okay to not hold conversations with your fetus. Put your feet up and have a bowl of ice cream and relax, already!
This is what all my conversations with my kids prebirth were like and since they still liked me I’m pretty sure content doesn’t matter. The important thing is that they hear your voice and if you’re talking to them, yourself or some stranger on the street doesn’t really matter.
I guess I’ll have to talk my way through editing grub.conf to reconfigure my old dual boot computer to boot by default into Windows (we’re giving the computer to my in-laws).
I was mostly joking. I find it rather hard to imagine what kind of conversation one could have with a fetus. I feel kind of silly trying. I’m not sure why I should feel any sillier than I do when I talk to the cats, but I do.
I have absolutely no idea if a 31 week old fetus can even hear. I assume they can detect the vibrations of your voice as well as any intestional distress you might be experiencing.
Talk about everything. Talk about what your doing. Talk about your thoughts. Talk about their future. Just remember to stop talking to yourself after the baby is born.
I talked to both my kids in utero pretty much the same as I did after they were born - more or less a running monologue about anything I would’ve otherwise been muttering to myself about (until, of course, they started talking back). I also sang a lot in the car to and from work, but then again, I do that anyway.
Yeah, definitely chalk this up as something “they” say you’re supposed to do, and ignore it if it makes you uncomfortable.
I couldn’t bring myself to talk to Mimi in utero. After she was born it was even a struggle, and yes, singing was the way I broke into it, and telling fairytales (it’s amazing how you DON’T remember how they go…). But mostly singing. First the alphabet song, then I started making up lyrics of my own about whatever we were doing. She is fifteen months old and I still make up new lyrics to the same tune.
With my babies, I spent the entire day just narrating everything. This got to be a very ingrained habit. I was seriously embarrassed the day I found myself alone at the grocery asking no one in particular if we needed more “noodlies.”
When my wife was pregnant, I used to take every opportunity to tell my pre-born son my side of the story, because I knew he was spending so much time during the day with his mother. I’d say things like “I know mommy has probably been trying to tell you that football is stupid, but once you break out of there we’ll watch a few games together and you can decide for yourself. Just try to keep an open mind. But if you become a Manning fan you’re cut off from the inheritance.”
