Techno Babble in Movies and TV

Sure, its been done before but FARK had a youtube link to some techno babble that made me laugh.

For those who don’t want to click a youtube link, the clip has something going on, on the internet (the clip is too brief for me to tell what has happened) and one of the characters says: “I’ll create a GUI interface in Visual Basic, see if I can track an IP address”

You go girl. Create that GUI interface!

Share yours.

What? You can’t expect the poor girl to track an IP adress with a crappy looking interface, can you? I mean, catching serial killers is all very well and nice, but you really need to do that `in style.

Have I talked already about the movie Untraceable? The one where FBI agents were unable to record a streaming internet video?

Copycat has this amusing little scene where an e-mail deletes itself, complete with graphics of it mooning the reader as it hops away into never-never land, becoming utterly untraceable.

I love the techno babble in Doctor Who. “I’m going to make up a fancy sounding word now, and you’re going to pretend to believe me.”

It occurs to me, that’s something the Doctor might actually say.

I didn’t see Untraceable because it seemed unlikely that there was a single important plot point not given away by the trailer. Was I right about that?

Who remembers Boiler Room where Giovanni Ribisi’s character was to download the entire contents of his hard-drive onto a single floppy disk?

And he did it in like 20 seconds or so.

The Star Trek TV shows of the last 20 years are notorious for this, especially Voyager. I’m sure there are drinking games involving any mention of the deflector dish or reversing the polarity of something.

Meh. it was probably just a buch of Excel sheets.

I don’t think it was ever stated that he was copying everything; just the important files necessary for implicating the evildoers.

Of course, he could have just copied them the day before, rather than waiting until the last heart-pounding second.

I have a friend who used to get upset at something from TOS. Either Spock or Scotty says: It’s a twisted diode captain!

I don’t recall ever actually seeing the scene myself, but my friend goes off on it whenever TOS comes up.

Twisted diode captain? That sounds like the name of some weird band or DJ.

Spike was showing Voyager several times a day, and I’d catch about the last 10-15 minutes of an episode when I got home from work. The phrase “spatial anomaly” or a variation thereof was a common one.

“Ten movies streaming across that Internet, and what happens to your own personal Internet? An Internet was sent by my staff on Friday, and I got it yesterday. The internet is not something you can dump something on. It’s not a big truck. It’s a series of tubes.”

Wait…that wasn’t a movie…

ST: The Next Generation had quite a few episode where everything was resolved by some sort of radiation made up for that particular show. I called them “magic wand rays.”

Several movies I’ve seen have shown an electronic funds transfer in the form of a progress bar, or by showing the dollar amount start at zero and count up to the final amount. I think that’s how it might have occurred in the Harrison Ford thriller “Firewall”. Every time I’ve transferred funds electronically, it’s been pretty much instantaneous, but in these movies, there is a tense moment as the character waits until they have all the money.

I don’t have much of a problem with that, because it’s pretty much a case of a god talking to an insect.

When it’s someone sitting in a basement writing code, though, it’s a bit harder to stomach.

-Joe