Omegaman: If you have applied a can of whupass to hate and fear, then I must humbly acknowledge this feat with open awe. Those are two very formidable opponents!
I live in Oakland and I’m not afraid of very many things. (a lot of fearful things, like robbery at gunpoint and homelessness, have already happened to me, so I don’t have to fear them.) The one thing I’m really afraid of is people. Not strangers – the ones I know. The ones I have crushes on, and the ones who’ve decided they’re my personal nemeses, and the ones who want something I have. Especially the nemesis ones. People can be really ugly.
And hate! In relation to pride! Funny you should say that; I have, just yesterday, resolved to stop griping about people to other people. It’s unattractive, and I don’t like that about myself. But I’m going to have to tattoo it on my eyelids or something, because I’ll need constant reminding.
For instance, I just did it again, didn’t I?
Zoe: It’s strange, the particular thing that will break through the initial shock and numbness of a sorrowful event, and make it real. Very often a small thing. Something happened to me once that rendered me actually unable to breathe; my throat was simply constricted so much that I couldn’t inhale. It’s terrifying.
I am sorry to have unwittingly made you feel bad, and I do really appreciate your telling the story.
