I was thinking about how to respond to that without violating the forum rules, and you did it better than I could imagine.
And Uncle Rojelio also proved that all Austinites aren’t that cool, either.
I wasn’t born in Texas but was brought here at 4 years old. The State has its good points & its bad ones.
Like every other state. And I’ve heard a good bit of pride from New Yorkers & Californians. Not so much from all those rectangular states in the middle…
Fortunately, no.*
*FTR, I am a New Mexican living in WEST Texas.
…but Texas wants you anyway!
See, I’m pretty sure Uncle was conveying his feelings but there’s a joke in there, and I think folks missed it.
Kyla’s right. Bay Area folks seem genuinely surprised when you tell them, yes, I’ve spent time in your city, and it’s fine for a visit, but I’d never want to live there. Likewise for New Yorkers. Whereas we Texans don’t expect you to want to live here. In fact, we dare you to live here and deal with the heat, fire ants, and traffic. If you’re tuff enuff you’ll earn some grudging respect.
Honestly, I don’t really have a problem with any state residents, except Okies and Arkansans. They hate us Texans because of our fluorinated water, indoor plumbing, and paved roads.
Ever hear an Okie refer to Texas as Baja Oklahoma?
The main thing that bothers me about Texas is the little inconveniences here. Just the other day I was out on my riding the back forty on my ranch, practicing my lasso skills on one of my oil wells, when my brother rides up in one of his many Cadillac convertables with the longhorns on the front to ask me if I wanted to go with him down to Huntsville to the execution of the retarded gay atheist. Naturally, I whooped with delight, threw my ten gallon hat into the air and emptied my six-shooter into it. My brother finished off his twelfth Lone Star and was rarein’ to go, but it was time for the six 'o clock call for prayer, mandated by the Texas Constitution. Silently we knelt, facing the direction of the Alamo.
So we jumped back into his Caddy and headed for town, but I suddenly remembered that I had left one of my twelve shotguns in for repairs and needed to pick it up. That’s when I remembered it was Sunday, and the 24 hour gun repair shops are closed for an hour! I was so rootin’-tootin mad, I didn’t even notice I’d spit tobacco juice all over my best chaps!
texas is still dead to me.
Axe the Austin Lounge Lizards.
Texas is a big state, North to South and East to West
Alaska doesn’t really count, we’re bigger than the rest
You can waltz across it, though, so grab your yellow rose
And sing another song of Texas–this is how it goes:
One more stupid song about Texas,
For miles and miles it rambles on
Biggest egos, biggest hair, biggest liars anywhere,
Let’s sing another stupid Texas song
By God we’re so darn proud to be from Texas–yahoo!
Even of our pride we’re proud and we’re proud of that pride, too
Our pride about our home state is the proudest pride indeed,
And we’re proud to be Americans, until we can secede.
Whad’ I tell ya?
Tex-Mex is bland and tasteless. Much better is the Mexican food as made in northern New Mexico – Albuquerque and Santa Fe and the like. It has a lot of local Indian influences that make it outstanding.
I grew up in West Texas and managed to escape. It’s really not possible to describe what’s wrong with Texas to someone who’s never experienced the place. It sounds like the same gripes as with some other places, but it’s a case of “same same but different.” You really have to see it for yourself.
On driving across the state: “The sun has riz, the sun has set, and here I is, in Texas yet.”
I lived in Texas (well, okay, West U, Houston) for a while, and I had a great time. Also, since I come from an area that produces a pretty fair number of Texans (a local high school had a five-year reunion in San Antonio, which got a better turnout than the one at the school), as well as a congressman who menaced his ex-wife with a FREAKIN’ SHOTGUN, I’m really not in a position to criticize.
Admittedly, that part of the state is better than West Texas. More stuff to do. Prettier.
But still, the bottom line is: Texas just sucks. Period.
Jealousy.
Seriously, there is nothing wrong with Texas. It’s a beautiful state. We do have some nutjobs in the Legislature, but apart from that, it’s a great place.
Obviously, you don’t venture up into to the panhandle very often.
So what do people do in Wisconsin? Ask them politely to leave? “Hey dere, yung fella dere in the dark, Its 3:00am and yer in my livin’ room, ya mind, maybe if it woudn’t be too much problem for ya dere, to put down my grandmother Hilda’s silver and go ahead and leave before ya wake up my wife and daughter. Well, I gots to go up, I guess I will see youse later when you make it upstairs.”
Margarine hatin’ cheap beer guzzlin’ Northern Wussies 
You do not kill people to protect your pickup truck. We are not talking about home invasions here. We are talking about people who steal stuff out of the yard or garage. We are talking about people who have offered no physical threat to the homeowner.
We met a couple from Texas and they said the funny thing was that everything in Texas was “Texan.” This isn’t a truck this is a “TEXAS TRUCK!” We’re having an “Old Texan BBQ.” This is a recipe for “Texan Ribs.” We’re fixin to go to the “Old Texas Rodeo” tonight. This is some good “Texan Jerkey.”
They also mentioned that to many Texans, very little matters that happens outside of Texas. While an ice storm that buried the NE would get reported on the local news around here, very little gets reported on local news that didn’t happen or didn’t concern Texas. They admitted to even being surprised when some old friends called them concerned about some flooding in their area. They initially didn’t understand why a Oklahoma news station would be reporting on flooding in Texas since it probably wouldn’t have happened the other way around.
My college buddy moved to CA to go to college, and thought that there would be this inter-state rivalry about which state was better. All he got was looks of, “jerk”.
He took his college-met wife back to Texas, and she told her co-worker, “You know, people in other states don’t go on about how their state is the best.”
“Well, that’s because they don’t have A, B, C, D…”
A few years ago I started a thread in the Pit about “Texans, get over yourselves”. You would have thought I had declared there was no God/Santa/Tom Landry.
One member finally went so far as to say that other states should be jealous of Texas’ shape, because so many other states were so boring. Have you met the people who like to point out that Texas was a sovereign country first? Try asking them why it petitioned to join the USA, then, if that was so great.
Man, I can get worked up a bit about this.
OTOH, I remember someone here pointing out that Californians assume that they’re on the cutting edge of freakin’ everything.
Another college buddy in about 1991 showed me his Virginia drivers license, which showed him in profile, as he’d gotten it when under 21. Very easy for the bar bouncer. About 10 years later, CA put a red stripe on the license of under-agers and put the picture on the other side.
Someone on this board pointed out that someone he met from CA was aMAZ-ed that PA had a magnetic stripe on its licenses, since CA didn’t at the time. They were soft barely-laminated cards, with no digital info at all. But of course the Californian assumed that the land of Hollywood and Silicon Valley would be the first to have everything.