First off, let me state that I am a Christian. I wouldn’t say that I’m a fanatic by any stretch of the imagination - sometimes, I lean more towards an agnostic approach.
That being said, I want to scream at my kid’s friend for what he said to my son yesterday. Apparently, my son had a small scratch on his head from the playground. Nothing big, just a scratch. Making him look eerily like Harry Potter, (whom I adore, btw). He already does, but the scratch added to the effect.
This kid proceeds to lecture to my son ALL DAY that it looks like he has the Mark of the Beast. Then he gives him the whole rundown on Revelations.
They’re both 7.
Thanks to friend and his entire right-wing fanatical family whose been shoving this down his throat since day one to the nth degree, my kid was up most of the night convinced that the Rapture was going to happen, and if he went to sleep, he would be taken to heaven, and then since his parents didn’t have that special Mark, they wouldn’t be able to buy food for 7 years. Or, what if the Rapture did happen, and his little brother went, but because he had a scratch that looked like the Mark, he didn’t go, and was left here? He cried uncontrollably because he didn’t want to go away from home yet, he wasn’t ready for Heaven.
I did talk to his teacher this morning (who is a Baptist minister’s wife, btw), and she said she would handle it, but we were up half the night worried about him going to heaven.
Kids can be cruel to each other. Unfortuante, but true.
My oldest is nine and, for whatever reason, always seems to need to blow his nose.
One day, he needed a few dollars for something (I don’t remember what). So my wife goes to the classroom to give him the money. However, the teacher had already started the lesson, so my wife didn’t want to disturb the class. Just at that moment, a classmate was arriving (late) for class. My wife (who knows just about all the kids in the class – she’s one of the “class mothers” and is involved in school activities) asks him to hand the money to her son. The kids walks into the classroom, holds up the money (dollar bills), and says out loud “Hey, Steinhardt, you can blow your nose in these!”
Later on in the day (a few hours later) when my wife went to pick him up from school (there was no bus service because it was a legal holiday), she asked the kid why he did what he did. He had no idea what she was talking about.
Kids can simply be cruel to each other. I work with mine so as to make them aware of other’s feelings (maybe that’s why both my boys get picked on in school?), but most kids simply don’t gain the level of maturity necessary to avoid this until later in life.
Talk to that kid’s parents. Set your boundaries now. Tell them what is and is not acceptable, because you are the one who is responsible for your child’s religious upbringing.
And then tell them to reign in their little Hellhound.
If necessary, sever this ‘friendship’ for your child’s good, because it’s not really a friendship.
I went through a similar experience as a child. I was raised in a loving Christian family, but thanks to over-zealous teachers, group leaders, etc. I was sometimes terrified of the idea of going to hell, and was convinced that I was not “sincere” enough in my faith, or doubting myself. I remember crying myself to sleep one night, begging God not to send me to hell. It is a terrifying concept for a child to consider. I did not tell my parents about this (it was one church leader in particular, who, strangely enough, was not even teaching us in accordance to our denomination).
Reassure your child that God loves him (if your faith disagrees with the literal interpretation of scary things like the end times, tell him why). Do not let your child hang out with this child if it continues to be a problem. It might be worth a try to talk to his friend’s parents and explain that if they are to continue to be friends, you would prefer that he not be preached to anymore. If this child comes from a fundamentalist family, it might be hard to get him to stop trying to preach to or convert your child, though. Be prepared to cut off this relationship if it continues to harm your child.
If he has a trusted church leader or teacher that might be able to reassure him, that could help also.
:rolleyes: So basically, Unwashed, you’re saying that people who have beliefs have no justification for complaint when people with different beliefs mess with them? :rolleyes:
Ditto contacting this kid’s parents. Quote HEAVILY from the Gospels-about love, acceptance, friendship. Remind them of the goats and the sheep-that whole parable about how “Whatsoever you do to the least of them, that you do unto me,” and tell them that when their son says that kind of thing to your kid, that he’s doing it to Christ.
If your son keeps being afraid, maybe there’s a minister of your denomination who could reassure him?
I would also tell your son to simply say, when this kid continues on, “Forgive him Father, he knows not what he does.”
If people try to harass others with the Bible, be prepared to use it right back at them. Use it the way Polycarp does. Speaking of which, he should see this.
Thank you, Thudlow. I have told him differently, and will continue to do so, but I don’t take it to the extreme that this family apparently does. I don’t believe the “fairy tale” explanation, but I might lean more towards a “collection of stories intrepreted by different people in an effort to guide our moral character.”
I did talk with his teacher this morning, and I believe she will attempt to correct the situation. Part of the problem will be that these two kids are paired up together based on abilities, and will likely continue that relationship, due to the size of the school and their ages. But everyone is right - if it continues, and I’ll be monitoring it very closely - I will contact his parents.
Without meaning to flame, I believe that part of the problem is the demoniation that the family belongs to - they are highly fundamental, leaning towards charasmatic (?) Baptist. I attend a Baptist church, mainly for the size of it - many different options involved - but was raised as a Methodist, so our grounding is much different. The child is basically witnessing - I know he has good intentions - but my child is extremely literal, and just isn’t ready yet for all this death and destruction. Where all the kids he attends church with have been pressured to be baptised, and have done it, I can still see my son yelling out “I’m drowning, I’m drowning” while he’s in the baptistry in front of the congregation.
I have no problem with any religion and I see it as a very important thing for people have and understand - but if your kid is so into your particular faith that he actuall believes people when they tell him he’s going to Hell, maybe you try some moderation.
He’s 7? I’ve never even heard of a seven-year-old with convictions to begin with. Do you live at church?
At age seven I was told by my teacher that I was going to hell because I did not know how to tie my shoelaces. Since I did not know what hell was, she educated me in detail. I found it very disturbing, despite not having any religious beliefs or convictions.
I’ll bet his friend’s family does the whole Saturday evening, Sunday morning and afternoon and Wednesday thing. Mine’s more into GameCube than religion. My kid is literal - if someone told him that the sky was purple with orange spots, and insisted on it, he would walk outside and check.
He understands that something like Harry Potter is a story, but the concept of God and all that goes with it is a little overwhelming right now. Throw in all that’s happened in the last year or two in the world - 9/11, the space shuttle, Iraq - can you imagine how inconceivable that would be to a 7-year old? And there’s his friend, who has all these terrible things to say. Add it all together, whether he realizes he’s doing that or not, and he’s thrown for a loop.
We don’t attend church regularly - in fact, this last weekend was the first time we’d been in about 7 months, and even then he stayed home with his father because he’d been up late the night before and I wanted him to sleep in - It was just me and the 5-year old.
I just think that’s a little deep for kids that age - not yours, the other one. It’s one thing to teach your children the values of your faith, but quite another to make’am into little versions Billy Graham or Jack Chick.
I think The Great Unwashed has a point. I don’t have kids, but when I do, I’ll avoid this sort of problem simply by telling them that there is no God, and when we die we cease to be; that life is a brief flicker in an all-encompassing void that waits with a terrible and eternal patience to swallow us all. There ya go! No more sleepless nights worrying about eternal damnation!
This really makes me mad. If someone did this to my child, I would have to inflict some mental damage back.
I would find the child, prefferably alone, and tell them in a deep dark voice that I am the devil and he is in deep dung with me. Scare him. Tell him that you will stick the mark of the beast on his ass a few dozens times and the stamp is on the tip of my steel toed boot! AMEN.
If you are not that low brow (I am), call that little bastards parents and tell them off. Tell them to keep their stinker 1000 yards away from my child or else. QUOTE Ezekiel 25:17 (if you don’t know 25:17 watch the film Pulp Fiction or look it up on Google). Tell them that yes, your child is a loving, darling child, but YOU are the antichrist. Again, scare them.
I do not have a child, but MY FAMILY is and will be very important and I will be damned if sick people screw with them.
“VENGENCE IS MINE SAYETH THE LORD” (BEST BIBLE VERSE)
You know, the kid, the “witness” is probably going to grow up to be a very messed up individual.
Seven years old isn’t too young to get scared when a friend tells them something. Hell, I remember being 14 and being petrified to go to sleep because my cousins told us about Bloody Mary.
So far, my kid seems better. He did get up the next day and went to check on his little brother, to make sure he was still here. My lame attempt at humor to try and keep him from thinking about it was “Well, I guess you two haven’t been good enough to go yet”. (He did smile, at least). And while he doesn’t talk about it much at home (at least yesterday), he did ask me when I tucked him in last night if “tonight was when the Rapture was going to happen.”
He said that his teacher asked him if the other kid was scaring him, and he told her no. Turns out, being 7, he thought she was asking about “right then”. She pulled him aside on the playground as she didn’t want to make a big deal about it in the classroom just yet. I don’t know if she talked with the other kid yet or not. I sure hope so.