When you asked last week how much time I needed, I told you I needed four days. You said that wouldn’t be a problem, they almost had it ready to go.
Then you came back on Monday and told me it wouldn’t come in until yesterday.
Yes, technically two minutes before quitting time qualifies as yesterday…
Now I have two days to put it together when I told you I needed four.
Yes, I know you don’t give a damn about how much stress you’re giving me. I know you don’t give a damn if I have to stay late rather than going home to take care of my wife who’s seven months pregnant.
And I certainly do appreciate you and my boss coming by every thirty minutes to see how much progress I’m making. Yes, I am certainly aware that this is our biggest product, going out annually to every one of our customers. I’m also aware that the brilliant committee has been fiddling with it for the last three months but was only able to get me the final version of the copy “yesterday”.
Oh, wait, that’s NOT the final version? Committee’s still trying to wrangle the numbers so they all don’t get egg on their faces? And you’re not quite sure exactly when they will get them to me. Let me prognosticate: I predict a delivery time of two-minutes before quitting time tomorrow.
I’ve been ninety-nine percent stress-free for the past three years. But now I can feel that my entire body is completely tense. Today I’m going to go out and buy a pack of cigarettes at lunch because that’s the only quick-fix for stress that I have left. I used to savor that nice little buzz they gave me that sent away the stress, but I haven’t had need of that until now.
NO, please, no, don’t do it! Think of your lungs! Think of all the cancers! Think of the children! (I don’t know exactly where the children fit in, but everyone’s always saying it.) Just keep saying to yourself, “This, too, shall pass.” Maybe yell at a few people, too. That usually helps.
Tygr, how about instead of smoking the cigarettes yourself, you tie your boss, his imp, and all the other enema-guzzling ass weasels to their chairs and force them to smoke a pack each? I bet that’d help your stress even more.
You want some REAL stress relief? Try smoking crack. Then you’ll have an excuse to kick some ass around the workplace, and hell, the way things are going you might even be able to claim it as a disability
[sub]And here’s some good news for all the none of you that care: Smarmy little ass-monkey just came by and told me that the committee’s numbers won’t be in until Monday anyway and he went ahead told them that because of the delay I couldn’t be expected to have anything ready until Wednesday. This is the sound of me breathing deeply as the tension and stress flows out of me, unclouded by cigarette smoke. Yes, I knew you’d be proud of me.[/sub]
Don’t smoke; go to the gym instead. You can work off your frustration by punishing the weights, and if you have a speed bag handy, you can punch that baby and pretend it’s your boss’s face.
Um…not to tell anyone what to do, but since I’m kind of partially responsible for this little hijack, can I please ask that if we’re going to have ButchGayGuy vs. FemGayGuy again, that we take it to either a new thread or continue it in an existing thread of that subject (if any are currently open)?
Well, I’m just saying that going to the gym is better for working off stress than smoking. And I’m reliably informed that, with respect toMatt_mcl’s Gorgeous Guys list, some folks find in-shape guys kind of, well, “hot”.
Not that being in-shape is a necessary criterion of sexual attractiveness. My BF is short, tubby, and absolutely smokin’ hot.
Also, does it need pointing out that going to the gym does not automatically turn a man into a hulking neanderthal? A man can be “in shape” and still be remarkably svelte.
I’m with gobear on this: exercise is a great stress reliever. So is sex. And kicking puppies. And pushing old people down the escalators at the mall.
Well, since I knowI am on that short list (and if I’m not, don’t even tell me), I must respectably contradict my dear matt; I have, indeed, seen the inside of a gym (and no, not on my knees in the shower, either! ). I haven’t been there in a few months, though…
I will also agree that it’s as good a way as any to relieve stress, which I believe was at least a small part of the OP.
). I haven’t been there in a few months, though…