eschereal added to The List
But wait… wouldn’t that make the car a…
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It would make them a bunch of kamikasbees
::snfaulkner adds himself to The List::
Beeshido Code?
I was quoting futurama. You guys were the ones who made the awful puns. 
But yeah, my name is and always has been at the top of The List.
See? Portmaunteaus like this (and kamikazbees) are funny. Puns are not.
I feel your pain.
I was clearing a former pasture of overgrown brush with a bulldozer, when a basketball sized Bald-Faced Hornet nest rolled into the cockpit, amidst the levers and pedals.
I was lighting fast, but the bees were faster. I bailed, swatting half the nest off my body, leaving behind a trail of quickly discarded clothing and watched as my dozer carried on without me.
The creek came to the rescue and trapped the runaway dozer, but not before dragging a quarter mile of fence with it.
Having just filled the fuel tank, there was plenty of time for the neighbors to gather to watch and offer advice to a naked man, as the dozer wallowed and churned in the creek.
A couple brave but foolhardy souls assessed the situation and tried to shut the thing off before it was decided that it was just wiser to leave the thing chugging away until it ran out of fuel or wallowed a hole big enough to drown itself.
Great story!
Wish that was my only bee story, but bees and I go back a long ways.
In my surveying days, three of us were surveying a new road. The new guy was brushing line with a machete at the bottom of the mountain. I was watching his progress through the instrument as he started whacking a tree. He’d take whack, stop. Whack, stop. I was wondering what was going on, when the tree dropped and the guy hit the dirt before the tree did.
I hollered at my uphill partner and we beat feet down the mountain to rescue the new guy. Apparently, he was unfamiliar with the sound of angry bees and couldn’t figure out where that buzzing was from. As it turned out he was highly allergic.
He was out cold, swarmed with bees. I sluiced the bees off best I could, and picked him up and hauled him up the hill away from the nest. He swelled up so fast we knew we were in trouble. My partner and I took turns chugging up the steep mountain packing the guy as far as we could and throw him down for the other one to try and force air through his throat.
Dang near killed all three of us before we got him to the hospital.
Cripes!
One thing to think about - those were probably European Honey bees. If they were Africanized, he’d be dead. They attack in 10x the numbers.
Fortunately Africanized honey bees haven’t made it this far north yet. We’re mostly troubled with Bald-faced Hornets and ground nesting Yellow Jackets.
Honey bees can only nail you once each, while hornets can hit you with a fiery hammer time after time.
I used to raise honey bees and never had to use protection other than a puff or two of smoke. The sting of a bee doesn’t even compare to a hornet slamming you over and over.
Had a goat crawl into a junked car once and came out with a yellow jacket nest stuck on one of his horns. He went tearing though the woods with me in hot pursuit but I didn’t find him until he came back home a few days later. He was lucky to have survived.
Heh, another surveying story… we were putting in a road and one of the guys took a dump on a bees nest. Again, I was watching from a safe distance when I saw the guy rolling down the hill with his pants around his ankles and bees hanging off his balls. He was able to walk back to the rig, but he was walking pretty spraddle legged.
Good username/post combo!