Poor little Cookie Monster has a problem, which means I have a problem: whenever she takes a dump, she hops out of her tray and drags her butt across the kitchen floor. While this is amusing to watch, it makes a dreadful smear of shit on the tiles which I have to clean with bleach, on a daily basis. (Added to this is the problem that Cookie absolutely loves the smell of bleach, and tries to lick it off the floor, which is rather dangerous.)
Cookie, who is a good-natured cat normally, really doesn’t like going to the vet. She lets us know this by going completely and utterly ballistic in the surgery, flailing around the room, growling, howling, and slashing at anything she can reach. One time she bit me so hard on the hand that she hit an artery, and the vet ended up dressing my wound instead of treating the cat.
So now, when I turn up wearing a zipped-up heavily scratched leather jacket and thick gardening gloves, I see the vet go pale. But clearly there was a problem, so I took her anyway, and, after I’d retrieved Cookie from the ceiling and got her in a vice-like headlock, the vet gamely squeezed her her anal glands. A nasty stinking liquid squirted out of them, and after I’d got her home, she no longer did the butt-smear thing. Unfortunately, a few weeks later, she started doing it again. So back down to the vet, who by this time was clearly terrified of Cookie, another wrestling match and another squeeze.
Alas, this week she’s started doing it again.
Now, I’d like to save the expense of repeated visits, and for the sake of the vet’s nerves, the cat’s sense of serenity, my kitchen floor, and my sanity, does anyone know how I could perform the procedure myself? It doesn’t seem to be that difficult once we’ve got the cat restrained for a few seconds, but I don’t want to hurt her. Is this a simple procedure?