The Celebrity Death Pool 2004

The Game Room
221

Lat minute substitution: Scratch Maggie Smith, and replace her with Ted Marchibroda the former NFL coach. I certainly don’t want to see Professor McGonigal buy the farm…

222

Jumping on at the last minute, here goes:

  1. Pope John Paul 2
  2. Ronald Reagan
  3. Johnny Carson
  4. Yogi Berra
  5. Stan “The Man” Musial
  6. Bart Starr
  7. Clint Eastwood
  8. Sean Connery
  9. Bob Feller
  10. Shirley Temple
  11. George Herbert Walker Bush
  12. Paul Schaffer
  13. Mickey Rooney
223
  1. Pope John Paul II (elderly Catholic dude)
  2. Jerry Lewis (mostly unfunny fundraiser)
  3. James Brown (Godfather of Soul)
  4. Lady Bird Johnson (wildflower planter, beloved Texan)
  5. Ronald Reagan (ex-prez)
  6. Vince McMahon (WWE honcho, pushing 60 and still getting hit in the face with chairs)
  7. Hulk Hogan (washed-up wrestler, almost-certain 'roid user)
  8. Joel Grey (actor-singer)
  9. George W. Bush (hopefully soon to be ex-prez)
  10. John Ashcroft (attorney general)
  11. Margaret Thatcher (Bristish ex-Prime Minister)
  12. Mickey Rooney (actor)
  13. Valerie Harper (actress)
224

I would like to revise my nominations, please. My new nominees are:

  1. Pope John Paul II (dob 18 May 1920)
  2. Margaret Thatcher (dob 13 October 1925)
  3. George Best (dob 22 May 1946)
  4. Hamid Karzai (dob 24 December 1957)
  5. Richard Pryor (dob 1 December 1940)
  6. Prince Phillip, Duke of Edinburgh (dob 6 October 1921)
  7. Stephen Hawking (dob 8 January 1942)
  8. Ronnie Barker (dob 25 September 1929)
  9. Mollie Sugden (dob 21 July 1922)
  10. Robbie Williams (dob 13 February 1974)
  11. Ronald Reagan (dob 6 February 1911)
  12. Richard Briers (dob 14 January 1934)
  13. Arthur C Clarke (dob 16 December 1917)

Sorry to be a nuisance. Happy New Year everyone, and good luck.

225
  1. Yassir Arafat
  2. L. Paul Bremer
  3. Fidel Castro
  4. Arthur C. Clarke
  5. Gerald Ford
  6. Charlton Heston
  7. Whitney Houston
  8. Osama bin Laden
  9. Jerry Lewis
  10. Pope John Paul II
  11. Richard Pryor
  12. Ronald Reagan
  13. Boris Yeltsin
226

Wanting to get in under the wire, if the hamsters will let me:

  1. Pope John Paul II (Pontiff, Bishop of Rome, and Polish soul brother)
  2. Paul Williams (singer, songwriter, actor, short round guy)
  3. John Nash (Mathematician, Nobel Prize winner)
  4. The Naked Cowboy -real name apparently Robert John Burck- (NYC attention seeker, pop culture flotsam, and future trivia question answer)
  5. Dusty Rhodes (pro wrestler, redneck)
  6. Jack Higgins (pulpy adventure novel writer)
  7. Mako (prolific character actor)
  8. Melanie -Safka- (former pop singer, 60s footnote)
  9. Charles Taylor (exiled former dictator of Liberia, prison escapee, business associate of Pat Robertson, and nasty piece of work)
  10. Courtney Love (untalented rock star, occasional actress, junkie, nut job)
  11. Herbert Lom (actor, Dreyfuss in the Pink Panther films)
  12. Gene, Gene The Dancing Machine -Patton- (crew member, and “character” on The Gong Show)
  13. Bobby Allison (NASCAR racing legend, member of “The Alabama Gang”)
227

People whose obit I’d hate to see in the coming year :

  1. Albert Feldstein (former MAD editor)
  2. Robert Silverberg (writer)
  3. Harlan Ellison
  4. Ray Bradbury
  5. Arthur C. Clarke
  6. Ringo Starr
  7. Ralph Nader
  8. Al Franken
  9. I’m drawing a blank - will try to get back before the deadline.
228

I might as well get a list in, huh? Here goes.

The Celeb section

  1. Whitney Houston (would anyone be surprised, the real question is if its self-inflicted or not)
  2. Ron Santo (gonna be a real sad day, especially for my dad, but the guy is losing body parts like crazy and the fact that he missed the Cubs playoff run broadcasts tells you how bad its getting)
  3. Vern “Mini Me” Troyer (I almost put Ghorge Muresan on here just to balance things)
  4. Evel Knievel (just cause alot of people are picking Robbie)
  5. Joey Bishop (the last of the Rat Pack is due)
  6. Farrah Fawcett (however it happens, it’ll be portrayed in a TV movie inside or a year)

The Politico Section
7) Pope John Paul II (duh)
8) Ronny Reagan (see above)
9) Pervez Musharraf (its the trendy pick)
10) Fidel Castro (this guy’s fallen off the radar, it’s time for a comeback)

The Sports Section
11) Stan Musial (and St. Louis weeps)
12) Bum Phillips (the Mad Cow scare will be too much for him to take)
13) Vin Scully (and something finally distracts the news crews from Kobe)
There you have my first ever Death Pool list, lets see how it pans out.

229

Count me in.

Ronald Reagan
Robert Byrd (US Senator, West Virginia, I think)
Henry Kissinger
Augusto Pinochet
Princess Anne (revenge of the corgis)
Pope John Paul II
The next Pope
John Wooden (Legendary UCLA basketball coach)
Dick Enberg (CBS Sports announcer)
Rick Wakeman (keyboardist)
Luciano Pavoratti
Courtney Love
Richard Pryor

alternates:
Chris Squire (bass player)
Ringo Starr

230

Since it has apparently been ruled that Saddam will not count if he’s legally executed, even though I picked him before he had been so much as even captured, and the rule states

, and Saddam is under no such sentence, I will retract Saddam and replace it with Pervez Musharraf, president of Pakistan. But dammit, if the lack of Saddam costs me the crown, this whole thing is played under protest.

And if the ruling says that Saddam is valid, even if he’s executed, I want to keep him.

231

For several years now I’ve selected my list of names for this pool but being a habitual lurker I’ve never posted them. Since the only points I would have ever received were for Chris Farley, I’m not sure why I’m finally coming out of hiding to play in public. I obviously stink at this game, but here goes nothing:

Richard Pryor
Pope John Paul II
Courtney Love
Albert Gore III
Arthur C. Clarke
Annette Funicello
Zsa Zsa Gabor
Ronald Reagan
Michael J. Fox
Jerry Lewis
Billy Graham
Michael Jackson
Liza Minelli

scurries back to lurkdom

232

C&P’ed from my entry on the the LJ Death Pool:

Ok, last year, my only scorer was Mr. Zevon, but that was a gimme. Other than that I’ve never come close to picking a winner in these pools. So this year, I’m going for quality of points and not quantity. No old or sick people hovering on the brink of death for me! I’m going with the James Deans and the John Belushi type shocking deaths this year:

  1. Jimmy Fallon - (actor - Saturday Night Live cast member)
  2. Pink - (musician)
  3. Jim Carrey - (actor / comedian)
  4. Jon Gruden (football coach (youngest head NFL head coach ever))
  5. Gwyneth Paltrow (actress)
  6. LeBron James (basketball player / phenom)
  7. Meg White (person who whacks the shit out of the drums in a very untalented way for The White Stripes)
  8. Simon Cowell (American Idol cruelty disher-outerer (hopefully after he trashes someone they’ll stab him with a tuning fork))
  9. Debbie Matenopolous (ex co-host of The View who now seems to host the What’s On TV channel for my cable system)
  10. Mia Hamm (soccer player)
  11. Sean Astin (actor / hobbit)
  12. Gwen Stefani (singer / dream woman)
  13. Michael Jackson (my one hold over from last year, just because him going down in a huge ball of flames would be the most intriguing story of the year … Elvis Presley for the new millennium)
233

I’m still drawing blanks on who to add to the beginners on my list , so I’ll just contribute a few from everybody’s list :
9. Ronald Reagan
10. George W. Bush
11. Pope John Paul II
12. Michael Jackson
13. Osama bin Laden

234

BIH Boy, gimme another name, quick!

Tom Baker? James Doohan? You people are cold!

We have about 7 hours 40 minutes to go, folks…

235

Flymaster, what cazzle said the 28th about picking Saddam.

236

I also have Saddam on my list- I understood the rules to be “no one on death row”. Saddam is not on death row. It hasn’t even been decided where he’ll be tried yet. Anyway, since he might not be a “valid” choice, I’ll substitue Ted Kennedy. How much longer can his liver last, anyway?

237

My list for 2004

  1. Lady Bird Johnson
  2. Ervin ‘Magic’ Johnson
  3. Jerry Lee Lewis
  4. Jerry Lewis
  5. Ronald Reagan
  6. Art Linkletter
  7. Ann B. Davis
  8. William Shatner
  9. Barbara Billingsley
  10. Larry Storch
  11. Professor Irwin Corey
  12. Don Knotts
  13. Jayne Meadows
238
  1. The Pope
  2. Ronald Reagan
  3. Osama bin Laden
  4. Alistair Cooke
  5. David Spade
  6. Peter O’Toole
  7. Meryl Streep
  8. Zhang Zemin
  9. Dick Clark
  10. Bob Barker
  11. Walter Cronkite
  12. Johnny Carson
  13. Fidel Castro
239

I’m jumping on the band wagon for these two:

  1. Pope John Paul II
  2. Ron Santo

Celebs:
3. John Goodman
4. Muhammed Ali

Musicians
4. Robert Plant (Led Zeppelin)
5. Nikki Sixx (Motley Crue)
6. Brian Wilson (Beach Boys)
7. Syd Barrett (original member of Pink Floyd)
8. Billy Joel (pianist)
9. Pete Townsend (The Who)
10. Dave Navarro (guitarist, Carmen Elektra’s hubby)
11. David Crosby (The Byrds, CSNY)
12. Brian May (Queen)
13. Jay-Z (rapper)

Alternates:

  1. Ralph Friedgen (U of Maryland football coach)
  2. Cynthia Lennon (ex-wife of former Beatle)
  3. Ravi Shankar (sitarist)
240

1- Ronald Reagan (Former President)
2- Charlton Heston (Actor)
3- Donald Sutherland (Actor)
4- Julia Child (Chef)
5- Dr. Ruth Westheimer (Sexpert)
6- Jerry Louis (Comedian)
7- Johnny Carson (TV Host)
8- Bob Barker (Game Show Host)
9- Bob Mackie (Clothing Designer)
10- Raquel Welch (Actress)
11- James Doohan (Star Trek Actor)
12- Hugh Downs (20/20 Host)
13- Mick Jagger (Rolling Stone)