The cheapest and/or most money-obsessed person you know - with horror stories, please

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

I’ve got some work-related ones I should add, too.

I worked a couple of summers in this factory near home to earn money for college. The long-timers would all complain that, at Christmas time, all they got for an extra stipend was a ham. They jokingly referred to it as their “Holiday Boneless.”

The last place I worked gave out $50 bonuses at Christmas – and then deducted taxes. So you’d get like $34.86 (??)

These are the same people who, last year, spent $40K to $50K in legal fees suing little ol’ me, for going to a competitor for more opportunity and a 40 percent raise, after 2.5 years of faithful service to them. Seems I violated a non-compete clause that I wasn’t aware I signed when I initially filled out my application and other documents. (Yeah, I felt stupid about that, but I felt a little better to learn no one else was aware they signed one, either.)

Keep in mind, all that document gave them the power to do was to keep me from doing the same job in the same area for 12 months. Thankfully, my new employer picked up the legal fight against them, and kept me on the payroll, working elsewhere.

So, in essence, those penny-pinchers spent 50 large to keep me from doing something that, in ONE YEAR, I could do free-and-clear anyway.

Which I’m now doing, and trying to punish them daily. :slight_smile:

22

Death brings out the uglies in people…

Before my mom died she made my ex her executor thinking that it would make it easier on us kids. Two things happened.

About two weeks before her death, my sisters rolled into town. Mom wanted to talk to the four of us kids. During this, my one sis, miss greedy decided that we should go through mom’s jewellry. She kept insisting even tho the rest of us kept saying it was not the appropriate time. Finally, with tears in her eyes, mom pulled out her good jewellry and as she was telling us “her” wishes as to who got what, miss greedy jumped around the house putting stickies with her name on them on the backs of everything she wanted. She jumped with glee when she received our grandmother’s engagement ring and was irate when mom handed me her engagement ring. She told me she wanted me to have it because I was the one that had always been here, something miss greedy was further pissed about.

It was a dreadful afternoon and mom was distraught. A couple of days later when I got to the house, mom said to me, I really did it today. My sister had called her and mom, thinking it was me said, your sister is one of the greediest people I’ve ever met, I can’t even believe I raised her. Miss greedy asked who she was talking about, mom replied, Miss greedy of course and then realized it wasn’t me. We had quite a giggle as she was telling me this.

The second thing that happened was that my ex, being executor knew all about my mom’s financial affairs and he worked it out how much each of us would get. One night he came into the house, opened his briefcase and handed me a sheet full of figures. It was his list of how we were going to spend my inheritance. I was stunned that he could be so cold hearted. The man was always the cheapest person I had ever met but this just blew me away. The day that I received my inheritance cheque from the lawyer, he stood there with his hand out waiting for me to sign it over. I told him I wished mom had left it all to some charity.

23

I had a first cousin once removed–my great-aunt’s son–who was some 30 years older than I. I didn’t see Bill much, but I saw him enough to witness a particularly disgusting way he had of saving money.

Bill chewed snuff, you see. Now you may think chewing snuff is pretty grody all by itself, but there is a way to extend the stuff that’s grodier still. Bill would put his chew in for however long…and then take it out and put it back in the can so he could chew it more later.

My father and my uncles chewed snuff too. Bill was also good at bumming chews from them, which he could then spit back in his own box and rechew. Nobody else everaccepted a chew from Bill, unless they personally witnessed him opening a new can.

The hell of it was, Bill had money–he’d gotten into oil stocks well before the OPEC crisis of the early '70s. But he was apparently determined not to spend any of it.

24

My grandmother in law once drove 20 miles to a different county because they had 4% sales tax instead of 5% in her county.

She was buying 1 can of tomato paste.

25

I love that sort of logic, Mully. Reminds me of the people that say: “I don’t give a damn if they raise the fuel prices. It doesn’t affect me - I only tank for 10 bucks anyway!”

26

The miserly lady was Henrietta Robinson
Green. She was a distant relative on my
mother’s side (who was a Robinson). I heard
about her as a child. Her son (the one
with the amputated leg) and daughter spent
the entire inheritance!

I also have distant relatives whose parents
worked all their lives, saved a bundle, and
after they retired started spending a lot
of the money travelling. The relatives went
to a lawyer and tried to file a lawsuit
to keep their parents from spending the
children’s inheritance. The lawyer’s reaction?
“This is the first time I’ve heard of an
inheritance without the people being dead.”
So maybe compulsive miserliness is a genetic
thing in my family.

27

Rudy. Rudy would count toilet paper pieces & allocate them to his girlfriend each day.

He would also show her on his computer each day how much money he was making from his stocks.

28

My aunt Patsy. She is evil incarnate when it comes to greed, and gets worse as time goes by.

When we were kids, Patsy would return an item to a store for a refund if she found it at another store for even two cents less. We got recycled Christmas and birthday presents. One year, she gave my baby sister a toy. She had wrapped the box in such a way as to allow the box to be opened without removing the wrapping. I thought I recognized the toy, and later removed the wrapping paper. Sure enough, the box had my name on it. My mom had given it to one of her kids - not represented as a new toy, but just in a “Would your kids like some of Kim’s old toys?” way, as her children were younger than I was. My sister was younger still, and ended up receiving many of those toys back, newly wrapped and represented as new. Patsy was also fond of filling out mall store credit card applications for the “free gift,” then using those as her gifts to other people.

But the real evil came out when my grandmother died, and then later my grandfather. On my grandmother’s death, granddad decided to sell the house with the assistance of my mother, whom he knew he could trust. Once this was decided, Patsy would show up for random visits and steal everything she could get her hands on - from the photo albums to the bathroom towels, from the knick knacks in the living room to the bottle of dish soap in the kitchen. She was brutal.

When granddad died, she took jewelry off of his body in the casket. My stepfather confronted her and offered to forcibly remove granddad’s wedding ring from her person, wherever she had put it, if she didn’t put it back on him. That one thing, she did put back. Other things, she did not.

She put together a collection of photos for the funeral, photos she had previously insisted that she had not stolen from the house. My mother asked her if she could have some of them. Patsy burst into tears and said no, they were all she had, and accused mom of having everything else. B**ch. My brother snuck one of the photos out, leaving an IOU note in its place, so that he could have a photographer friend make copies of it for the other two siblings. Patsy, convinced my mother had done it, threatened my mother with police action and lawyers. Once the copies were made, I gave the original photo to a friend who was going to New York and had him mail it back to Patsy from there.

My mom was executor of granddad’s “estate.” He had been living in a nursing home for his last years, and was existing only on his pension. What little money there was left from the sale of the house had gone to cover the two funerals and a few other expenses. All he had was his clothes and a few possessions with sentimental value only. Patsy threw a screaming fit when there was no public reading of his will. (She has watched too much TV - that almost never happens in reality.) She is convinced that there is money, plenty of it, and that she is entitled to it. She has convinced a lawyer of this, and my mother is still being harassed because of it. Mom has cut off all contact with Patsy except through lawyers. I don’t blame her one bit - this is only some parts of the whole story.

Thanks for letting me rant.

29

People who think money is the root of all evil have never had to work for it.

30

When my paternal grandmother died, she’d been living with her daughter and son-in-law. She’d paid rent, even asked ot be allowed to move into a nursing home because she didn’t want to be a burden. After her death, when the children where dividing up the estate, that aunt announces that she thinks she should get an extra $10K from each of the others ($50K in all) to compensate her for having my grandmother live with her. The sibs all said no, but gave her an extra $1000 each. She wouldn’t talk to them for years, until my father was dying of cancer.

My mother has made me the executor of her will. I told her I would only do it if she explained to all of us, as a group, what her will contained. I didn’t want to be made out as evil because my mother decided to give less to those sibs she’d helped out all there life. We all listened to her wishes, and agreed on them. Because my mother has a lot of antiques, we asked if she’d have an appraisal done so we wouldn’t get ripped off by an art/antique dealer. Also, since she’s remarried, her husband has stipulated that if he predeases her, she gets all his assets. He says he’s given each of his children a million dollars, and that’s enough for anyone.

StG

31

Whew! After reading this, I’m sooo glad my family all gets along very, very well.

My mom may be cheap, as is the rest of her extended family, but none of them are greedy in the least. Thank God for that.

–Tim

32

I don’t quite know if this qualifies as cheap or miserly, but my uncle, who is an art appraiser, has cheated various members of my father’s family (9 siblings) out of several million dollars, by some people’s estimates. However, he also spends like crazy, so it’s not like he hoardes the stuff. And I won’t even get into the pedophilia . . . some members of my father’s family are truly not right in the head.

Same uncle bought my grandmother’s house several years back . . . the one in which she grew up in France in the early part of this century. I don’t know how much he paid for it, and it doesn’t really matter to me, but when we went to stay in it we paid for an entire month. 2.5 weeks later he came by and pleasantly forced us into the smaller guest house, which uncomfortably housed myself, my brother and my parents, while my sisters stayed in the other house. I still wonder if he did anything to them at night . . . he has daughters, you see.

Anyway, to get hot water we had to heat it up. There was no hot water faucet and no shower. The place had no heating or AC. The loft had been built into the house, and was about four feet high . . . you get the idea. Put this together with a very dry French summer (rained twice all month) and 40 cows and you begin to get a sense of our displeasure.

I’m going to restrain myself from telling you the entire history of abuse in my family, but suffice it to say the behavior was learned by my uncle. My father is the youngest in his family.

33

While this is not nearly as bad as some of these stories, it did make me furious.

My father’s oldest sister is a real bitch. Being the oldest, she thinks she is in charge of everything!(remind me to tell you about how she ruined my wedding just for spite some time) Anyway, when my grandmother got sick and was dying (we didn’t know she was dying at the time, she was just really sick) my aunt hounded her day and night about where the deed to her house was and what the account numbers were to her bank accounts because “We’re going to need to know any day now–no use putting it off!”

After complaining one day about how stubborn my grandmother was being, my aunt said, “She needs to just face reality.” So I said, “Maybe she needs to concentrate on getting better without you constantly telling her she is going to die!” Well, then she puts on her sickest smiling face and speaking very slowly and condescendingly says, “Noo, what she needs is someone to keep on her about this.” But, I digress!

Anyway, my grandmother was the most generous person in the world even though she didn’t have much at all. She would give you anything you needed or asked for, no questions asked. She didn’t have anything of real monetary value but when she eventually did die, my bitch aunt decided that all my grandmother’s kids (6 of them) would go and clean out the house and if anyone of them or the grandchildren wanted anything in the house–including individual family portraits in frames–we would have to bid on it!!

Now, this was not an estate. It was a little run-down house with really old refurbished (and refurbished and refurbished…) furniture. Except for clothes and food, I doubt anything in that house was younger than me. My bitch aunt decided that the money that was “raised” from the sales would be used to fix up the house so they could sell it. After paying for all the repairs with the money, having her brothers and sisters clean the house from top to bottom and getting the house ready for sale–surprise!! She “sold” it to her son for a fraction of what the siblings had decided to sell the house for. Her reasoning? “Well, I thought you wouldn’t mind since it was family.” I hate that woman.

34

My grandmother, who has eight banks because she’s reached the limit on what the FDIC will insure at each, eats at Drake Hospital, the local long-term care facility’s subsidized cafeteria in order to save a buck on lunch.

A lot of parents eat lunch in the cafeteria with the patients. So picture a bunch of people in wheelchairs, in semi-vegetative states, drooling and being fed slowly by their anguished parents…and at the next table my grandma sits oblivious to their plight, happily munching on a roast beef sandwich that only cost her $1.95.

35

OMG, all you folks with greedy, grab everything before the body is cold relatives, I think we’re related! When my Grandmother died, my Aunt got everything in the house. Not that it was anything valuable, mind you, it just really sucked not having anything tangible to remember my Grandmother by. My parents asked if they could have back the jewelry that they had bought her in Korea to give to us kids, but my Aunt said that it was tradition for the daughter to get the mother’s jewelry. Okay, maybe, just maybe that could be a valid arguement except that they had another sister who didn’t get anything, either!

I have this sad feeling that my sister will be the same way when my parents die. My mother already has warned me to make sure I’m in the house when they die or I probably won’t get jack. She has already “borrowed” my mother’s first wedding ring & engagement set (my dad bought her a bigger diamond) and “lost” it, even though my Mother was going to give it to me! Same with my Father’s class ring, which was supposed to be mine, too, because we share the same birthstone. Arghhh! It’s not like they haven’t bought her enough jewelry as it is.

Getting back on track, don’t you hate those people who want to divide the restaurant bill to the penny when you go out to eat with them? What’s wrong with rounding up to the nearest dollar and letting whatever is extra go to the tip? And they never, ever include the tax, so you wind up paying extra. Well, unless they are seriously anal, which is another trait all together…

36

I forgot to mention this. When my son was born, because of some serious complications, he had to be born at a downtown hospital with a newborn ICU instead of the suburban hospital like planned. It was terrible, both of us nearly died. So, my mother in law comes to visit us and the first words out of her mouth were, and I quote:

“I’ll have to make this a short visit, because the parking here is too expensive.”

It was something like a dollar an hour! Yes, it sucks to pay for parking, but come on. And she wonders why I don’t like her very much.

37

My brother-in-law. Good Goddess, he makes me mad.

Last year, my father-in-law died. Prior to his death, my brother-in-law Tony was driving us and his other brother-in-law nuts about John’s (my father-in-law) money. He swore up & down there was a lot of it, and he kept saying “we’re entitled to it.” Sorry, dude, but we’re not entitled to jack diddly, unless your dad says we are. He’s not dead yet, asshole. Besides, John had remarried after my husband’s mother died. John’s marriage to Marie, my husband’s mother, was not a particularly happy one. They stayed married, but they weren’t happy. John’s second marriage, to Dottie, was blissful. Only four years, but those two were just made for each other. As far as I was concerned, if there was any money to be had, Dottie deserved every dime, just for bringing John so much joy, and taking such exquisite care of him in his final days.

Tony was just crazed. He didn’t want Dottie to get anything that he felt he “deserved.” As it turns out, Dottie really didn’t get much. John and Dottie had a pre-nup. They both had assets of their own, and they wanted to make sure that their children were taken care of. We had to make some changes in John’s will, so that Dottie would get a little something, though. My husband and his brothers did get the money (there actually was some). It was divided equally.

One good thing came out of it, though. After John’s death, Tony sort of realized he’d been a jerk. He realized that he’d treated Dottie terribly, and he apologized. Dottie, being the kind-hearted, beautiful lady that she is, accepted his apology.

38

I’d pay a dollar to spend an hour with you, tt!

39

How do you think they got a home like that ? Maybe by being frugal and living under their means ? There’s a book called “The Millionaire Next Door” that talks about how a lot of “wealthy” people live and they’re not driving BMWs and drinking Becks. They drive beat up Buicks and drink Genesee. A real skinflint would NEVER hire anybody to do lockwork, they’d get a book at the library for free and learn how to do the work themselves. Just because you’re cheap doesn’t make you mean, it just means not being wasteful. I’m outta here, I have to go to Aldi.

40

Is that your highest offer, Chief? Looks like we might have to add you to the cheapskates list…