OK, so I bought a box of condoms the other day, which is a rare thing as I usually get my supply from the local AIDS awareness groups for free, but I was, um, kind of in a bind at the time…
Anywho, there was an insert about usage and special messages about Nonoxynol-9 and such, and I found these gems:
I didn’t realize pregnancy was a disease!
And these were some of the directions of use, in order and quoted exactly:
[quote]
[list][li]After ejaculation, carefully withdraw the penis while it is still erect. Hold onto the rim of the condom as you withdraw so that the condom does not slip off.[/li][li]Store condoms in a cool, dry place.[/li][/quote]
I’m starting to run out of cool, dry places to store my used condoms!
Pregnancy is treated like a disease by a lot of physicians, trying to get rid of symptoms and control the process to a ‘norm’. heaves a pained sigh It isn’t a disease, its a natural process and should be left alone unless something is actually wrong.
[/snotty bitchy mode]
Sorry, issue close to my heart.
Other than that, the image of Esprix in bondage gear is quite entertaining. Ohhh! cool, dry places to store condoms…Altoid tins!
Well I read the other day that you should keep condoms in a cool dry place because heat weakens the latex and you shouldn’t keep them in your wallet because of your body heat. But a lot of guys do. Who knows??
Um, the joke was that that particular direction came after they told you to take off the condom. :rolleyes:
But, yes, keeping them in your wallet is a bad idea. Do like the hookers do and keep them in your mouth in case you need to go down on someone at a moment’s notice.
There was a father and his little boy that went into a local drug store to pick up a prescription. While in the store the little boy was looking around and came upon a rather large display for condoms. The little boy looked at all the brightly colored packages and the different types and the different quantities.
The little boy went to his father and asked “Daddy, what are these condoms for?”
The father, stuttered, and said, “Well, they are for protection from diseases when a man and a woman make love.”
The little boy contemplated the concept for a few moments and then asked, “Then why do these come in a package of three?”
The father coyly answered, “Those are for young men in high school. One for Friday night, one for Saturday night and one for Sunday afternoon.”
“Uh-Huh,” said the little boy, “then why are these in packages of six?”
The father smirked, “Those are for young men in college. There are two for Friday night, two for Saturday night and two for Sunday afternoon.”
“Wow,” said the little boy in amazement. He then asked, “Well, then why are these packaged a dozen at a time?”
The father answered, “Those, my son, are for married men. One for January, one for February…”
