Posted with their consent - here are responses by my friends Dan and Steve. Dan wrote:
I interpreted the rejection as a delineation of what separates them. For some Israelis, there is only them, and the rest of the world. For example, many feel that American Jews literally have no right to judge them and Israeli behavior, and resent any effort to do so.
To put it more personally, Ephraim believes that he is struggling for the survival of Israel, and that Avner has chosen not to help in that struggle, and so Ephraim rejects Avner both because he is bitter about that rejection, and because Avner cannot pretend to be an Israeli without shouldering the burden of defending it.
I found it an upsetting ending, but an understandable one. I know that Steve feels closer to Israel than I do, even though I have relatives there and my relatives participated in the founding of the country – living in the region before Independence… Steve may disagree with this example, but not everyone who considers themselves a Jew can simply come to Israel; an orthodox rabbinim has taken control of a government group that determines who is Jewish and who isn’t, and if you cannot trace your ancestry to someone they deem sufficiently observant – No Jew for You!
My comparison with the film is that when Avner refused to return, he died to Ephraim and effectively ceased to be a Jew as far as Ephraim was concerned, and that is a very Israeli perspective. Of course, even though Israel would seem homogenous, it really is diverse in terms of not simply Muslims and Christians as well as Jews, but also Jewish refugees from Europe after the holocaust versus Jewish refugees from the Arab world. . . Orthodox versus non- might be a more important divide, and the population growth of the Orthodox may be more important than that of the Palestinians in terms of what Israel will look like in the future, but I’ve probably already gone way out of the scope of your question.
Steve responded:
It’s been a while, but I think it’s simpler than that, but then again so am I.
I think Eric Bana wants out, and when the handler realizes this he is simply ready to go home.