I agree with Ruby about the dog. As long as the dog doesn’t do it very often, he’s most likely fine. My pup does the scoot from time to time when he has a particularly persistent cling-on caused by passing long strands of my girlfriend’s hair that he picks up off the carpet/furniture/etc. He gets kind of a dangling dingleberry, so to speak. It’s funny because whenever he sees me looking at him, he looks so embarrased and immediately plops into a rigid sitting position, like “nothing to see here, I’m just sitting, don’t bother me, go away now. . .” Then I have to come outside with a paper towel, and I have to pry him up out of the sit position as he looks at me like he’s going to die. He’s a funny pupster.
Back on topic. . .sitting, for goodness’ sake, sitting! And, at least for guys (or maybe it’s just me, heh heh), I would think the reach-around is the only possible way. . .there’s barely enough room up front as it is, let alone if I tried to put my arm there. A little bit of a lean forward, reach back, and that’s all there is to that.
I was going to post here that I prefer the stand up method, but then I realized that I’d already started a bathroom themed thread here and I don’t want to develop a reputation as a one trick poster.
She just got upset, saying, “It’s not a pull through, it’s a push back. You always wipe back. That’s how they teach you.”
I tried to ask who taught her this, but she kept on going: “No, you always wipe backwards. And you never wear panties at night so your tunty can breathe.”
Don’t ask for the etymology of “tunty” (toon-tee) by the way.
As I’m writing this, she’s leaning over chair, repeating, “You always wipe from front to back. From front to back. From front to back. You always wipe from front to back.”
Let me get this straight, she claims to go between her legs and swipes backward?
Is it me?
At the risk of another lock-out for giving TMI, I wonder, can anyone get clean that way?
I’m not questioning anyone’s oral hygiene but, I think that when one is cleansing one’s “Tunty”, the hand with the paper in it should come no where near one’s “Yummy” lest one’s other oral activities be compromised.
I don’t question the sanitation, she starts near the tunty, pushes back past the anus, drops, and gets another sheet. What I question is going in through the legs. That just seems like madness to me.
Eh? I can’t imagine how many extra joints I’d need in my arm in order to reach all the way back around my butt, and all the way forward to the front of my… uh, tunty in order to perform the correct front-to-back wipeage. Where’s the madness in performing a quick front to back tunty-swipe, then a couple short spot-wipes at the backdoor? I don’t even have to fully extend my arm. Maybe it’s madness for you folks with all the jumblies down below, but for us it’s a free path, baby.
See, I knew that this act was not as “cut-and-dried” as many of us would have thought.
The confusion justifies the post.
Now, just to add a little twist to the whole thing, what would REALLY be strange is to have to perform this act with the opposite hand then the one you’d normally use.
You know, what if the hand that you normally use is in a cast or something. Doing it with the opposite hand would seem impossible to me.
Omni–It is impossible!!! My right arm is in a cast right now and I can’t decide which is harder: signing my name with my left hand or wiping my hienie with my left hand.