The headache I have: Near-miss on roadway with idiot of the day.

The BBQ Pit
1

A throbbing headache I’ve got now, after coming within a millisecond of plowing into the back of a Hummer at 75 mph and getting made into mincemeat.

A group of cars, of which I am part, zipping along on a four-lane major thoroughfare. The speed limit is 70 on this road. I usually keep a very good distance between my car and the car in front of me, especially when traveling at high speeds. Wow, it saved my life today.

I estimate there’s about seven or eight cars directly ahead of me, maybe four or five alongside in the right-hand lane. Suddenly traffic seems to slow, so I ease up and let even more air between me and the car in front.

In the next moment, the back end of this black Hummer is fishtailing and coming towards me (in reality, I’m traveling towards it) at a really disturbing rate of speed. I hear brakes screeching all around and I too slam on my brakes, skidding as I go. There’s oncoming traffic in the opposite lanes. There’s cars to my right, cars in front of me. OHHHH SHIIIII…

I’ve finally stopped, the front of my car almost kissing the rear of the black Hummer. I hear car horns going off, and as I shakily check my right blind spot to see if I can move over, I see the way was clear (and it was clear because there were about three cars that had run off into the grass off the roadside) and slowly maneuver into the right hand lane.

I putter carefully along in the right hand lane, scanning the area to make sure no one actually crashed their vehicle, and look ahead in the left-hand lane to see what might have caused all the commotion.

The idiot of the day: A blue SUV is stopped in the left hand lane, left-turn blinker on, the driver still intently peering into the distance, observing the oncoming lanes of traffic for an opportunity to hang a u-turn.

No, she wasn’t in a dedicated left-hand turn lane. She just stopped in the fast lane on a major thoroughfare, put her blinker on and even as I wobbled past, a good portion of my brake pads eaten, she was waiting intently for the rest of the oncoming traffic to pass so she could hang that illegal u-turn. There was still a cacophony of car horns going off and someone leaned on their horn and let it sound continuously.

As I passed I saw a small red car that had driven off into the grass suddenly dart back out into the road and nudge itself right behind the blue SUV - I’m assuming it was confrontation time. Eeesh. I counted my lucky stars I still had all my body parts in the right place and got out of there.

I’ve got a monster headache now and I wonder if the driver of the SUV realizes or even cares what sort of tragedy could have been caused today. All because she didn’t want to drive a little further down the road to find someplace safe to turn the car around. What a buttmunch.

2

But, don’t you understand? The Empress of the World just had to make a u-turn at that exact point, and all the rest of you mere mortals should have known that and simply cleared out of her way. Why were you looking at her like that? Don’t you know who she is?!

On a more serious note, I wonder if she has any idea of the chaos she caused. Maybe someone called 911 so the police could explain it to her? I’m glad you’re all right, except for the headache.

3

I’m glad you are okay. Some people are just idiots I guess.

4

Here’s hoping that all of the cars that were run off the road called the cops, and the SUV driver has to pay for new brake pads for every one of them. And hoping that no further accidents were caused by anyone approaching the scene after you drove away. Some people are just, to quote a Dan Savage reader, “dumber than a bowl of hair.”

5

The thing that’s scary? It makes the person who caused a huge pile up on the Mass Pike, back when I was learning to drive, look like a rational, thinking driver. The person I remember had slammed on the brakes and stopped in the travel lanes on the Pike because a school bus was stopped in the breakdown lane, going the other direction on a divided highway!

I’m glad you and your fellow travelers weren’t killed by this self-absorbed idiot’s actions.

6

Was she on her cellphone? …

7

I’m really glad you were practicing safe driving, and not tailgating. It’d be great if that lady got a ticket; maybe she’d use her brain next time.

(And fortunately, what you had was an actual miss, not a near-miss. You had a near-collision. Sure gets the ol’ adrenaline going for a minute, doesn’t it?)

8

Jesus. Effing. Christ. I might get a headache later from just reading about that. That’s incredibly scary. I wonder how many people got minor injuries because of this idiot?

9

And wearing a mink coat, and taking her cats to be declawed.

When I bought my car in 2002, the only non-standard option I required from the dealer was anti-lock brakes. Partly because I was seeing more and more of this sort of stupidity, and partly because the increased traffic on the roads means more and more drivers encroaching on that safe driving distance between cars. I try to be careful, but I still believe that it has prevented a few fender benders.

Glad you’re okay Electrical Storm.

10

You didn’t shoot lightning up her ass? :wink:

11

It wasn’t for lack of trying. :stuck_out_tongue:

Thanks for the support, you all. It’s great to finally be rid of that adrenaline headache too.

I’m wondering now if anyone had anything in the car that might have been damaged or might have gone flying and hit someone in the car during the near-collision (Thanks Baldwin :slight_smile: ), or if anyone’s car was damaged in some way after running off the road.

Come to think of it, I don’t recall seeing idiot of the day holding a cell phone. I don’t know, in some way that’s almost scarier. She’s that clueless and inattentive without any additional distractions? Yikes.

I hope that no one got hurt or had their car damaged. sigh

It’s baffling that Empress of the World, aka Idiot of the Day, didn’t appear to even acknowledge the chaos all around her that she caused. As I passed she was looking off towards the oncoming lanes of traffic waiting for a chance to turn.

Eeep. And she’s still out there.

12

:eek: Here’s hoping all that karma comes back to bite the Empress in the ass.

And I’m glad that you and everyone else are okay! If a bit less endowed with brake pads…

13

Not really. TEOTW simply stopped, and was waiting for the world to revolve around her.

14

[raises hand] I was an idiot driver today, and I almost caused an accident.

I was stopped at a red light at a highway intersection, totally caught up in my own thoughts. Light turned green, and I accelerated across the intersection, only to see traffic coming at me out of the corner of my left eye. I freaked, floored it, and made it across without getting t-boned.

I didn’t for a second think it was someone else’s mistake. I just took me a couple of moments to realize what my mistake was. I had seen the traffic light beyond mine turn green, and my brain flipped a switch.

I could have been killed. I could have injured someone else (though, I don’t think I’d have gotten anyone else killed, as they were just starting from their green light, and they had half their cars in front of them). At the very least, I would have ruined a lot of days and many, many more mornings.

So, on behalf of the lady who seriously fucked up, and for all the motorists I couldn’t directly apologize to:

I am SO sorry. What I did was stupid, thoughtless, dangerous, and deserving of a hefty traffic fine. I endangered myself and others because I allowed myself to drive on automatic instead of making a conscious decision. I wish to God I hadn’t done that, and every time I’ve thought of it, I’ve mentally kicked myself.

I abase myself. I grovel in mortification. I pledge to do better.

15

My dad told me once that it usually takes two people not paying attention to cause an accident (though I’ve seen exceptions to that…and just one person not paying attention can make things awfully tense). When I think of the times I’ve slipped up, I try to be grateful for the drivers around me that were paying attention and kept me out of an accident. And I try (not always successfully) to be understanding when someone else screws up.

Though someone coming to a complete stop in the fast lane would have jacked up my blood pressure.

16

Beat to the punch.

About a month ago I was rear ended at a stoplight by a woman who was talking on her cell phone. She even got out of her car, still talking on the phone, and ended the call by saying, “I’ve got to go - some asshole just stopped short in front of me and I think I hit him.”

That was followed the very next morning by a call and letter to my state legislator to make talking on a cell phone while operating a moving motor vehicle against the law.

17

I now feel more solidarity with the OP:

Last night Mrs. J. and I were headed home on our narrow two-lane road in Darkest Suburbia, when an oncoming car came screeching around a curve right into our lane. There was nowhere to pull off, so I got over as far to the right as I could, hit the brakes, and hoped for the best.

Fortunately the other driver regained control in time not to hit us head-on. I proceeded onward slowly, wondering if a possum, deer or maybe Bigfoot had caused him to swerve.

Nope…just driving way too fast to make the curve. Moron. :rolleyes:

18

I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the possibilities - I hear that Bigfoot can move fast when evading cars.

19

That “near-miss” bugs me too, but it’s correct:

near miss
–noun 1. a strike by a missile that is not a direct hit but is close enough to damage the target.
**2. an instance of two vehicles, aircraft, etc., narrowly avoiding a collision. **
3. something that falls narrowly short of its object or of success: an interesting movie, but a near miss.
My brother was four or five cars back from the same kind of idiot on the NJ Turnpike some years ago. The driver realized they weren’t sure where they were going so they came to a dead stop in the lane. Pile-up ensued. :rolleyes:

20

:dubious:
Was the Hummer in your lane, or in the lane next to you? If it was in your lane, and you ending up “almost kissing” it, then you were not keeping “a very good distance”, or you weren’t paying attention, or your car needs better brakes and tires. If the Hummer fishtailed into your lane, then that driver was not keeping a safe distance, or wasn’t paying attention, or is just a bad driver.

Why were there “brakes screeching all around”? Were none of the drivers paying attention, or did the woman’s car drop from above onto the road?

Just curious.