The Holy Grail

Sir,

I read Cecil’s answer to the question regarding the Holy Grail with great interest as he wrote exactly what I would have written - up until about a year ago.

Since that time I have - almost by accident - discovered the Holy Grail and seen it on several occasions. The History Press are publishing my account of the discovery in June next year. It is already being advertised on Amazon under the title ‘The Grail Chroncles’.

Furthermore, if there is anyone interested in the Arthurian legends, the book contains an entirely new account of the origins of the legends.

I cannot, at this stage, reveal the whereabouts of the Holy Grail (as the owners are not yet ready for the inevitable interest which will follow), but I can say that it is in England, and, no surprise, it is a chalice - as suggested by the early Arthurian accounts.

Thank you for this opportunity,

Yours Faithfully,
E C Coleman

I guess this is about this one

You misspelled “chronicles” in your book title? You need a new editor.

Perhaps you should tell The History Press them they plan to publish your book.

Also fill in Amazon that they’re advertising the book, they don’t seem to know yet.

Hold on a second, let’s be polite.

In fairness, there is a Grail book on Amazon.co.uk, to be published next year by the History Press under the name The Grail Chronicles: Tracing the Holy Grail from the Last Supper to Its Current Location, though why the author him/herself would get the name wrong is a bit odd.

Mr/s Coleman, I’m intrigued. While I don’t doubt there are individuals or organisations that hold previously undiscovered chalices, what is it that indicates to you that this is the grail?

On further investigation, there is an established author named EC Coleman who has published several historical tomes.

Here is the aforementioned Grail book at The History Press. Interesting synopsis, though I will warn our guest that the denizens of this board are very sceptical.

They probably already know they’re publishing it, since it’s on their website.

ETA: what jjimm said.

Apologies. My search capabilities must be dwindling, I didn’t find it at either place. I did see several other historical books by the author, and scanned through those results without…uh, without results.

E C Coleman, have you drunk from the grail, and were you consequently rendered immortal?

You’re only immortal as long as you stay in the cave. As soon as you leave you start aging normally.

No, no, no!

I have the Grail. I got it in college, where it was being used as an element in still lifes. If there is sufficient interest, I will post some photographs. I have not drunk from the Grail as I have been unable to get the layer of gunk off the interior.

So the Grail is a chalice, not a serving platter?

Yes, it is a chalice. It is also made of brass, not silver. It is marked in a language that is definitely NOT Hebrew, Arabic, Aramaic, or Greek.

I’ve uploaded a video of the Grail to photobucket.

Behold! The cup of the King of Kings!

“We already 'ave one, I’ve seen it. It is vehry nice.”

jjimm said:

It’s called a typo. It can happen to the best of us. Or are you complaining he only listed part of the title?

Both. But I acknowledge the book’s existence and am tentatively considering buying it.

Silly boy! The gunk is where all the mojo is.

Wait, are you saying if he gives it a thorough cleaning, it will cease to be a magical chalice of immortality and become just a shiny cup?

jjimm, I fail to see the significance of either complaint. Tpyos happen. Thye are easy. As for citing only part of the title, he cited the bold-faced header part that should be easily identifiable, not the extended subordinate clause part that runs on for three pages and people will gloss over and is only there so people realize “Ah, this is an academic.”

I mean, it’s not like he said the title was “The Grail Chronicles” when the actual title was “The Chronicles of the Grail”, or “The Chronicles of Mickey and the Grail”, or “The Grail Really Exists, Dammit, I Saw It, So There!”

We’re delighted to have E C Coleman here as a poster, and you’re very welcomed. However, we are not delighted to have you here if your only purpose is to tout your book.

It’s one of the logistical tangles: we are pleased when one of our posters has a book being published, and we’re glad to allow them some publicity for it. We are not pleased when someone comes here solely for the purpose of advertising their book (or other commercial product.) The former is one of the things we’re all about. The latter is basically spamming. So, we’ll wait and see what happens. If E C Coleman is a serious poster here, we’re very happy. If there’s no further posts from him after a few days, we’ll call this spamming and move it out of sight, out of mind.

Irishman, no idea why you’re persisting to nitpick a trivial, offhand comment I made. I would have expected an author promoting a new book to give the full book title, possibly examining it for for typos. That is all. However, I don’t actually give a monkey’s, and am not going to defend myself.

I just wish EC Coleman would come back and say hello.