The Impossible-To-Shop-For Thread

We all have at least one person who is impossible to shop for.

Most of my family is easy. Mom is a crafter and always enjoys jewelry and beading books. My siblings and nieces and nephews, also easy.

Dad, not so much:

[ul]
[li]He’s 73, a retired pharmacist. [/li][li]Doesn’t smoke or drink. [/li][li]He did a lot of household carpentry and automotive work back in the day but hasn’t touched his tools in at least a decade (and has been slowly giving them away to my brother and I over the years).[/li][li]Not a fisher, hunter, or gardener. [/li][li]Not a foodie or griller. [/li][li]Hates golf; was never really a sports guy at all. [/li][li]Not into fashion/clothes or interior decorating. [/li][li]Not a reader. [/li][li]Was a computer guy back in the day, but now he just uses it to browse Amazon.[/li][li]Anything even remotely resembling a toy, like a car model or a little drone or something, he’ll immediately just give to the grandkids. [/li][li]Loves gadgets, but anything he doesn’t already own that he’d want is likely well over my price range (up to $100).[/li][li]If he ever had a hobby, I would say it’s car shopping. Shopping, mind you, not buying. He would often go out on a Saturday morning by himself and come back late in the afternoon, just spending the day hanging out at various dealer lots and bullshitting with the salesmen. About once a year he’d come home with a different car, just about every year I’ve been alive until just a few years ago, and he officially announced he was done with that.[/li][/ul]

Things I’ve gotten him in the recent past:

[ul]
[li]International snacks of the month[/li][li]Classic car books[/li][li]Board game (Blockus, I think)[/li][li]Once he’d shown an interest in learning the guitar so I bought him a classical guitar that I don’t think he’s ever played[/li][li]One of these railroad spike guys[/li][/ul]

Any ideas?

Who is your impossible-to-shop-for person?

My wife.

I’ve learned that it’s no use buying her a gift unless she’s standing there pointing at it.

In all fairness to her, I’m almost as bad.

Gift Card to a favorite restaurant.

Older people have hearing loss and poor vision. Perhaps something which would help with that - magnifying glasses, amplified telephone, etc.

Favorite foods. That could be something home made - pie, peach cobbler, fried chicken dinner w/mashed potatoes, home made jelly/jam - home canned stuff.

And there is now internet TV. I just got this and have been watching YouTube ONLY for the last two months! Endless stuff on there which is educational - documentaries, old candid camera shows, old I Love Lucy shows, how things are made in factories shows - even how pharmaceuticals are made! Intelligent people would LOVE this!

And every TV related gizmo has YouTube on it these days - smart TV, Android TV boxes (Minix U1), DVD players, Blu-Ray players, PlayStation 3/4, etc.

Just need fast internet like 15 Mbps or faster, VDSL2 on “newer” internet router, and a better quality “Cat 7” wired Ethernet connection from the internet router to the TV gizmo box. (Cat 5 will not work much at all, cat 6 better, cat 6e even better, cat 7 best - wireless is too slow.)

This is why I’ve grown to hate xmas.

All year long whenever i see something I think my gf or kids would like, I buy it and give it to them. Then December rolls around, the pressure is on, and I am unable to perform. :frowning:

The two obvious answers are:

  1. Ask them.
  2. Cash which they can spend however they wish.
  1. Asked him dozens of times over the years. He never has an answer.
  2. I really dislike giving cash or gift cards. Seems particularly crass to give cash to a parent.

A Leatherman Micra usually makes a good gift for someone like that. It’s a well-built keychain multi-tool.

My father-in-law used to be one of these. Two ideas which have worked in the past: His favorite kind of chocolates and a framed set of three photos of his son and grandson at a local
playground. You could take a candid photo of him with his grandkids and frame it. Or if he’s the sort of person who hates having his picture taken, just take a photo of the grandkids.

Hell, how about me? Everyone asks me for ideas. I have none.

I’m 45. I have the things I need.

We went to a Secret Santa just-one-gift-for-every-adult thing a few years ago and it was the best idea ever. But spouses have unlimited rights to buy gifts for each other and I’m stumped for what to ask for for myself.

As just such a Dad, although a bit younger, I can take a stab. At 73 I doubt I’m going to want anymore ‘things’, since I’m already full up. Perhaps he wants to do things instead.

The interest in cars suggests he’d like tickets to something like a car show or a day driving a sports car perhaps.

Does he travel? Take him somewhere. Even if he doesn’t travel take him somewhere.

I just got a great haircut: Ear hair, bushy eyebrows trim, neck shave and everything. It was nice. Maybe he would like an expensive haircut (not at a beauty shop.)

Find the dude a hobby.

I’ve just given up, and am buying everybody gift cards.

Another thought: does he have a cause or charity that he strongly supports? Maybe you could make a donation in his name. (That presumes you support it too.)

He’s apolitical. Doesn’t really care about anything. But a good idea for someone else.

Does his place need work / repairs /painting? Would he be offended at you paying to have something that would make his life easier done to his home on your dime?

Way back in the day, a friend of a friend paid a cleaning service to send someone over once every two weeks for some general cleaning and pre paid it for a year.
(But would it make him angry or resentful?)

My husband’s siblings, my husband, and I all kick in a set amount of money every year to pay for my MIL’s landscaping. It’s the only thing we all know she’ll appreciate (she’s in her late 70s).

Asking is always good. But, you might consider a neat toy he might have had (or wanted and didn’t get) when he was a yout(h), something like Lincoln Logs or an Erector Set. He could play with them alone or with the grandkids.

Don’t underestimate the potential appreciation for a gift card. One year Hallgirl1 got me a gift card for Lowe’s. Now, I have a Lowe’s charge card and use it often, but Lowe’s is one of my happy places–I could, and have, spent hours browsing through that store. To get a gift card…I was very, very happy. It took me quite a while to decide what to get with it and I had a lot of fun trying to decide.

So, give a gift card to a place they like. (You mentioned Amazon–get him a gift card for Amazon! Speaking of Amazon, see if he’s dropped anything into his Wish List on Amazon.)

You cannot go wrong with photo albums or picture mugs.

Nobody ever asks for that, and they rarely make them for themselves, but they always appreciate having a mug with the photos of the grandkids on it.

We’re kind of in the same boat. The in-laws are in their 70s, and have specifically asked for only consumable gifts, on the theory that they are in the stage of life when they are trying to get rid of things.

Oh, and they live in Cyprus. I tried buying them a gift on Amazon UK once, but the shipping was a train wreck - it took more than a month. When I inquired as to why the package had been sitting at a sorting center in Germany for 2 weeks, Amazon unprompted) sent a duplicate and then tried to have them return the duplicate at their own expense. Oh HELL no. One nastygram cleared that right up.

So can anyone recommend EU-based places that will ship consumables to Cyprus? Chocolates, jam, something along those lines? I can deal with shopping in English, Spanish, French, or probably Portuguese or Italian in a pinch…