The Japanese Embassy

Not that I want to stand in the way of progress, but – fuck it, I want to stand in the way of progress.

When I moved into my current apartment 2.5 years ago, I wasn’t terribly pleased with the red brick wall that blocked half of my view, but the rest of the view made up for it. I get plenty of sunshine in the mornings, I look out at a nice big tree (nice greens in the summer, beautiful reds and golds in the fall, brown twiggy stuff in the winter), and below me is the former Japanese Embassy building. I don’t know how old it is, but I’d bet it dates back to the 50s at least, and it’s probably older. It is built in a style that I can’t really describe, but suffice it to say that “They don’t make them like that any more.” It’s really a beautiful building, and I enjoy looking at it in the mornings when I’m standing in the shower and soaping up my 'nads. And I hear tell that it’s a historic landmark. (The building, not my 'nads.)

For decades the building has been serving as apartments. Two years ago it was sold to a major university to be used as a frat house. That sucked. I’m not sure, but I think John Belushi is actually alive and living there. A year ago someone up-ended several trash cans in the back yard and no one has cleaned it up yet. The front lawn has been turned into a gravel parking lot. The law that states that they must shovel the snow from their portion of the sidewalk has been barely adhered to. I think they use a grapefruit spoon. And the parties – Argh! They are the worst during big sporting events. Fortunately Boston has not been doing well in the past couple of years, sports-wise.

Holy fuck, how I’m going to miss that Animal House.

Because, you see, it’s going to be demolished. Probably this summer. A developer is going to destroy the embassy building and put up a 6 story cookie cutter apartment building with a large outdoor parking lot and a 60 car undergound lot. It is going to take up a much larger parcel of land, destroying the wooded back nd side yards. I will lose my morning sunlight and probably my tree. My view will soon be nothing but brick walls. Since the units will be small and cheap, most likely they will be occupied by students. Something tells me that my new across-the-alley neighbors won’t be scantily clad college girls having pillow fights, though. I see all-night keggers in my future.

How did the developer get away with getting permits for this without alerting the neighborhood? I’m not sure, but I’m gussing there’s a door with a sign that says “Beware of the Tiger” involved. My upstairs neighbor, who I think is a lawyer, says that they probably did some stealth dealing, possibly not entirely legally. The last permit they need is for demolition, and there is a town meeting for that tonight. Thank Og for the lawyer atop of me, she alerted everyone in the building to this at the 11th hour so that we may go oppose this monstrosity. Had she not, demolition would have proceeded without anyone having prior notice.

I’ll go to protest it, but I think in the long run it’ll do not good. The worst of it is that I’m going to be living next to a construction site for the next several years. The fucking noise, the fucking dust, and who knows about how often water mains and power lines will be cut. Supid mother fucking fuckity fuck sluts. I fling poo in your direction.

Do you not have the concept of right to light? Also, here in the UK we have things called Tree Preservation Orders.

I just had to say your soaping up the 'nads line still has me laughing 5 minutes later.

[Pastor Richards]
Last I checked, we still lived in the USofA, not Communist China, you pinko-lefto-tree molester. Go back to your daddy’s trust fund and stop trying to impede the progress of freedom with your Lenin-loving wishety-wash!
[/Pastor Richards]
1-866-9-SAVE-ME

And 5 minutes after posting I regretted not icluding a line about watching scantily clad college girls having pillow fights while soaping up my 'nads. 'Cause that woulda been keen.

Yeah. I could understand scantily clas co-eds having pillow fights causing you to rub your nads more than old architecture.

Freak.

Huh?

Celtics, Bruins, etc

Let’s put it this way – during the World Series, I really didn’t need to watch TV to know how the Sox were doing. General noise levels from next door was news aplenty.

So, you have a female lawyer atop you, and you’re soaping your nads. How do you expect people to concentrate on the ranting with all that going on?

If you saw the lawyer, you’d be scrubbing your 'nads too.

“Scrubbing your 'nads.” So, that’s what the kids are calling it these days, is it?

They don’t play football or baseball, and therefore I don’t care.