Ms Hook is big on hanging wreaths on the front door, gottem for every holiday and occasion it seems. She has several generic ones to cover those embarrassing gaps between major holidays, so we are rarely wreathless.
About 6-8 weeks ago she had one of those bundle of sticks wreaths (about 18" in diameter) with a metal do-hickie hanging in the front saying, “Welcome,” on the door. (As an aside I’m trying to find one saying, “Piss off goat-felchers.” It’s only fair we both have our views represented.) A family of House Finches decided to build a nest between the metal do-hickie and the door.
The battle was on. Every couple of days I’d go out and tear down their efforts, I was sure I could wear them down. But then Ms Hook had a long weekend so we drove around California for three days. We we got back the nest was done and two little eggs were resting happily therein. Ms Hook was unbending in her position that we had to let them stay.
In due time we were the not so proud god-parents of two little feathered shit spreaders. Ms Hook refused to use the front door so as to not disturb these little bundles of joy and lice.
Yesterday the nest was empty, WHOO-HOO. My personal opinion is one of the larger birds, a raven perhaps, got them. This is not shared with Ms Hook for the fear she would want to leave the nest there so the finches could try again.
Down came the nest to discover that finch shit had firmly cemented the nest and wreath to the door. Two hours of scrubbing with various household cleaners finally got off all but 2-3 tiny specks that I convinced myself added style and charm to the door. I’d like to comment here that the local stores had a alarmingly small supply of “Finch-shit cleaners.” Any of you out there looking to make your fortune in a niche market, this is your big chance.
The wreath now graces the garbage can.