Romeo and Juliet - 98%
Ted Bundy and Cheerleader - 39%
Adoph Hitler and A jewish person - 46%
Jack Chick and Eve - 59%
Jack Chick and Satan - 1%
:: wiping tears ::
Oh, how I wish I could send a link to this thread to the author whose novel I just finished copyediting, and whose characters swear by the accuracy of the Love Calculator.
But that would be unprofessional. 
The chances of my marriage working out increase radically once I change my wife’s surname to match mine. Just as well she didn’t keep her own name then. I had no idea it was so important!
(doodling in notebook)
“Eve Chick . . . Eve and Jack Chick . . . Dr. and Mrs. Jack Chick . . .”
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between John Ashcroft and The Lady Bunny has a very good chance of being successful, but this doesn’t mean that you don’t have to work on the relationship. Remember that every relationship needs spending time together, talking with each other etc.
Hmm sweetie wannabe and me…
Both our full names: 47%
Names we go by: 67%
Because of course the names we actualy USE are more important than the names we were given.
Cecil Adams and Ed Zotti - 68%
Lynn Bodoni and Banning People - 53%
When come back, bring pie and Og Smash - 14%
George W. Bush and Drinking and Driving - 96%
Please stop me and From Using the Love Calculator - 92%
I’m not joking and I’ve got to stop this - 16%
For the love of all that is holy and Stop using this infernal thing - %
No matter how I enter it, we’re detined for doom. 
Also detined for a pell hecker.
I have only a 36 percent chance of a successful relationship with myself, which is odd considering all the masturbating I’ve done over the years.
Our favorite vampire slayer, Buffy Summers, doesn’t really belong with any of her three primary suitors, with Angel and Riley tying for top honors at 38 percent (technically, Angelus is a slightly better match at 39 percent).
She belongs with Cordelia.
Yes, of all the pairings I tested, and all of the permutations (first and last name, just first name, etc.), only “Buffy Summers” and “Cordelia Chase” exceeded 80 percent (84, to be precise). All four permutations of those two names exceeded 50 percent, actually, which only cements my observation.
But there will be no hot carpet-munching action between “Buffy” and “Faith” – they scored a perfect 00. Sad, but not unexpected, either.
Heterosexual love seems hopelessly out of reach for Buffy. “Buffy Summers” and “Rupert Giles” crawled above the 50-percent mark to 53, as did “Buffy Summers” and “Wesley.”
Interestingly, “Buffy Summers” and MY full name tested a healthy 77 percent. 
Here are the rest of Buffy’s results:
Buffy Summers and Spike, 29
… and Riley/Riley Finn, 38
… Angel, 38
… Angelus, 39
… Tara, 15
… Willow, 66
… Willow Rosenberg, 47
… Cordelia, 69
… Cordelia Chase, 84
… Rupert Giles, 53
… Giles, 39
… Ripper, 28
… Xander, 28
… Wesley, 53
… Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, 17
… Faith, 15
… ME (full name), 77
Buffy and Spike, 14
… and Riley/Riley Finn, 23
… Angel, 23
… Angelus, 24
… Tara, 00
… Willow, 51
… Willow Rosenberg, 19
… Cordelia Chase, 68
… Cordelia, 54
… Rupert Giles, 37
… Giles, 24
… Ripper, 13
… Xander, 13
… Wesley, 37
… Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, 51
… Faith, 00
… ME (first name), 62
Rachel and Ross - 56 %
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between Rachel and Ross has a reasonable chance of working out, but on the other hand, it might not. Your relationship may suffer good and bad times. If things might not be working out as you would like them to, do not hesitate to talk about it with the person involved. Spend time together, talk with each other.
Add their last names and the chances go down to 44%.
Monica and Chandler - also in at 56%
Phoebe and Whatshisname - 73%
Phoebe and Joey - 12%. Odd; the rocks in his head fit the holes in hers so well.
Joey and Chandler - Okay, now I’m beginning to question the accuracy of this thing. Anyone can see those two are meant for each other!
And one more
Ross and Marcel the Monkey - 41%. That’s it. I’m done with this thing!
If it can’t determine a deep and meaningful relationship by simply analyzing letters in a name…
Never mind.
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between Fred Phelps and Paul Lynde has a reasonable chance of working out, but on the other hand, it might not. Your relationship may suffer good and bad times. If things might not be working out as you would like them to, do not hesitate to talk about it with the person involved. Spend time together, talk with each other.
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between Divine and Dick Cheney has a reasonable chance of working out, but on the other hand, it might not. Your relationship may suffer good and bad times. If things might not be working out as you would like them to, do not hesitate to talk about it with the person involved. Spend time together, talk with each other.
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between Josef Stalin and Jayne Mansfield has a very good chance of being successful, but this doesn’t mean that you don’t have to work on the relationship. Remember that every relationship needs spending time together, talking with each other etc.
Dr. Love thinks that a relationship between Judy Garland and a handful of pills has a reasonable chance of working out, but on the other hand, it might not. Your relationship may suffer good and bad times. If things might not be working out as you would like them to, do not hesitate to talk about it with the person involved. Spend time together, talk with each other.
Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck = 96% (hmmmmm)
Charlize Theron and Sunbed Tan = 82% (dead on here)
Straight Dope and Total Dipstick = 87% (?)
Hamsters and Asshats = 18% (that figures)
** Han Solo and Princess Leia** = 23% (this is an outrage!)
Ghanima and Heath Ledger = 49% (hey, it can work!)
My daughter tested a few:
George Bush and Dick Cheney - 85%
George Bush and Susan Sarandon - 93%
George Bush and Michael Jackson - 12%
Frodo and Sam - 65%
yet…
Frodo and Sauron got 93%!
I just don’t get it!
Me and my wife (using first names): 0%!!
Me and Me (full name): 88%!!!?!