The odd beauty of insomniac crockpot cooking

It’s been a long week here at the Visible household. The flu got us, one by one, taking my boyfriend first, and then me as soon as it was through with him. Some other dramas took place, a few weirdnesses, a couple of stressors. Nothing major; just a long week.

Up until today I was feeling pretty rough, so I spent a lot of time in bed. Now, combine that with the fact that I’ve been sleeping late, and a big strong glass of green tea of dubious origin and staggering caffeine content way too late at night, add in a novel and a few levels of Diablo II, and you’ve got insomnia.

It’s nice, though, these days. In the days before the VisiBoyfriend came along, insomnia nights were terrors, lonely distraught vigils beset by self-doubt and all sorts of angstiness. Now, I just don’t sleep. No biggie.

I’m in the middle of kicking some skeletal ass deep in the second level of The Cave,when it comes to me that I bought a pork butt. A big, four pound pork roast, for no earthly reason except that it was on sale for about seventy cents a pound. And it occurred to me that I am the proud owner of a trough-sized crock pot. Somewhere between quaffing a healing potion and checking my inventory, it suddenly dawned on me that if I were to put the roast in the crockpot at about five a.m., it’d have twelve full hours to cook before dinner tomorrow night.

I continued on my ass-kicking endeavors for a bit, until it was past four, and went to work. Started the broiler, sliced some garlic. Washed the roast. Gave it a salt and pepper rubdown, then tucked garlic slices into little slits I cut all over the roast’s surface. Put it under the broiler for fifteen minutes. Laid a bed of sliced onion in the crockpot in the meantime. Out of the broiler, into the pot, there to be joined by bay leaves, clove, more onion, hot water, and soy sauce.

It looked magnificent. Really; the browning from the broiler, the onions festooning its surface in their circular cheerfulness, the tiny touches of green the bay leaves contributed, all of it amounted to a picture that, in my massively sleep-deprived state, moved me nearly to tears. The onions probably had a lot to do with it.

And I did it all without even waking the dogs.

It will cook all day while I get a protracted nap; it’ll simmer while I get blearily ready to face whatever remains of the day when I wake up. It’ll be poaching itself in its succulent juices when I come home from tomorrow’s expedition north, bearing a barbeque grill. And it’ll be ready when my boyfriend gets home from work, and our friend and barbeque donor arrives.

There’s something really strange about putting dinner together at five a.m. It feels like I took a sleepless night, and wrestled a prize from it. I can’t wait to smell that roast cooking all day tomorrow.

Damn, that’s a beautiful story of one man and his pork butt.

'S making me salivate, to be honest.

Dang it! I’m at work already! Now I’m hungry for pork roast and all I’ve got for lunch is a baloney sammich.

<grumble grumble grumble> goes Devena’s tummy.

MrVisible I just now noticed you are in Tucson. I was there March 1 - 4 and coulda said howdy and all, if I had paid attention earlier. Course, with y’all being sick and all, it prolly wouldn’t have been a good time anyway, huh? Oh well…so much for hindsight.

The pork roast sounds yum! You put way more effort into stuff than I do. My favorite chicken crock pot recipe is to salt and pepper a big ol’ hen, plop it down in the pot, pour a bottle of Italian salad dressing over it and let it cook all day. And here you are shooting down my theory that crock pot cooking is for us lazy cooks. :smiley:

Darn it! I would’ve love to have met you, and introduced you to the VisiBoyfriend. I think it’d reassure him to know that the people I talk to on the Web are real.

But the flu would’ve messed things up anyway, so I suppose it’s all for the best. I hope you had a good time when you were down here; you seem to have caught the worst of our winter weather. Today, it’s about 80 degrees and sunny.

And yeah, the roast is too much work for my regular crockpot cooking style, but a pot roast has always been a special meal for me; it doesn’t happen often, and when it does, it deserves some extra treatment. Besides, I did one of these months ago, and it was amazing.

Usual crockpot recipe: Split pea soup. Toss in peas, water, onions, ham, and leave it all day. If you want, throw in kielbasa a couple of hours before you’re gonna eat. Extra bonus points for making a loaf of bread from a mix. Yum.

Meanwhile, the roast is making the whole house smell delicious. I’m fighting off an urge to eat my desk. Can’t wait for dinner. I hope I’m awake when it happens, as I got about five hours of sleep…

<sigh> Maybe next year MrVisible. I usually go to the same conference bout this time every year. Yeah, the weather was bad but I spent most of my time sitting in training. Since I had to suffer, everybody should suffer, I say. :smiley:

Now I have a craving for split pea soup with kielbasa. yummmmmmmmmmmmm.

The hell with the pork, do you happen to play on US East? :wink:

I have no response to that.


US East is one of the Diablo2 multiplayer “realms.” I take it you play single player then.

Yeah. I don’t have much patience for online play. I’m not leet enuf.

LAN parties, however, are a blast.

Bah, playing with the usual bnet pubbies is a waste of time, especially with the nonsense dupehacking. Hate to sidetrack a cooking discussion with D2, but if you ever feel like playing with a few reliable people, let me know. A bunch of SDers occasionally play on US East and have quite a bit of fun.

Thanks, Maeglin! Let me know when you guys are planning on being on sometime, and I might join up. Could be a blast.

Hey, maybe we could bring the two divergent discussions together and swap Horadric Cube recipes.

Excellent idea, here you go!