Inky you have touched my heart with this topic and your efforts to preserve and protect the endangered flash in the pan bands of the last couple of decades.
I would be glad to make a donation to your fine cause, but I regret to report that Ayesha has already touched my wallet,leaving me unable to donate more than a postdated IOU.
Keep Up The Good Work!
Peace
“I believe there are more instances of the abridgement of freedoms of the people
Hate to quibble, guys…Okay, I really enjoy quibbling, so here goes:
(note: This is all off the top of my head. I didn’t look anything up–so you know that this is from the heart, not the reference book. I am sure I got some song titles wrong.)
I truly admire the work of the OHWRP. But I think your standards for admission are awfully loose.
Toto: Toto’s status as a OHW band has already been refuted by Coldfire, but let me say that they had at least 3 genuine hits: Rosanna, Africa, and that one where I can’t understand what they are saying: “blahblahblah, love isn’t always on time…”
Billy Squier: A one hit wonder! Hah! I wonder which one of his hits you consider the “one hit.” Maybe you are thinking of “The Stroke.” Big hits also include “Everybody wants you,” “Lonely in the Dark,” and “Rock me tonight.”
Thompson Twins: Had at least a few hits off that one album. A OHW, no. A Flash in the Pan, yes.
Belinda Carlisle: She was the lead singer of the Go-Gos. Therefore, I am not sure she can qualify as a OHW. Also, I think she had more solo hits than just that one, but I’m not sure.
Tom Cochrane: He was also in some incredibly well-known band, but I can’t think of the name.
My nomination for the OHWRP (feel free to quibble):
Dexy’s Midnight Runners: “Come on Eileen.”
You’re thinking about Hold the Line.
Toto hits in Europe include: Hold the Line, Africa, Rosanna, Stop loving you, and Mushanga.
Okay, John and Cold. In the spirit of Bricker’s “3 Minute Mysteries”, here’s a lyric for you.
“Tanya, Turkish, liked to fuck while wearing leather biker boots…”
The Nails, 88 lines about 44 women.
Whatever happened to Buckner & Garcia? I didn’t think that Pac Man Fever was fatal but it seems otherwise- thank god it wasn’t contagious. I barely overcame my Robotron Rubella.
As for what the guy from Men Without Hats is doing, here’s his website: http://www.holdman.com/
If you should stumble across Martika (Toy Soldiers) do us all a favor and put her to sleep.
Tom Cochrane fronted Red Rider, but in the U.S. this group was didn’t have any Billboard Top 40 hits. (In fact, “Lunatic Fringe” never charted at all on the U.S. Hot 100).
The Belinda Carlisle reference should be ignored, because it was part of a blatant attempt by Coldfire–who apparently doesn’t know what the New Topics button is for–to hijack this thread and make it into an 80s trivia hot spot.
Getting back to the original post, I find it hard to believe that a group affiliated with someone of Inky-'s stature isn’t aware that a better term for describing these individuals is “Unitary Hitmakers”. Frankie Ford (Sea Cruise, 1959), noted: "I have a quote for you on this ‘One Hit Wonder’ thing. I’d like to go on record right here saying, whoever that disk jockey was that coined that name, well he’s a no hit wonder! I mean, it can get rude. A jock did that one time in his introduction. I turned to him and said “Well then, you’re a no hit wonder. What have you ever done? Some people have five records that sell a million each. Some sell none. I’ve had one that sold 30 million!”
Also, I hope that the whole emphasis isn’t on those “cute 80s groups”, when so many worthies from the 50s and 60s are ignored. Don’t forget how many fledgling careers were brutally stamped out by the Beatles and the hordes of British invasion groups. Remember these sad stories from Jancik’s book: “Near zip is known about this Cleveland saxman” (Eddie Platt, Tequila, 1958), “Nothing is known of Renato Carosone” (Renato Torero, 1958), “They were no Sonny and Cher”, (Gino & Gina, Pretty Baby, 1958), “Rock and rollers never gave more than a passing notice to Earl” (Earl Grant, The End, 1958), “Good timing was not one of the Virtue’s virtues” (Virtues, Guitar Boogie Shuffle, 1959), and perhaps sadest of all, because it reminds us that we are talking about an era before music videos “Pictures of Rosie are a rarity so most fans don’t know what she looked liked” (Rosie & the Originals, Angel Baby, 1961).
Jesus whitetho, an insult without smilies?
Time for some coffee dude… sorry to disturb your peaceful morning.
:rolleyes:
Defect borg:
“Refutile is sistance. Your ass will be simulated”.
WallyM7 on Coldfire:
"Yeah, he knows a little about everything because they have a good prison library."
I’ll have you all know Escape Club has been spotted lurking under my neighbor’s deck. A humane trap baited with Taco Bell chalupas is being set up right now…
Ram Jam ran off with “Black Betty” and were never seen again. I saw it on Unsolved Mysteries.
“We are here for this – to make mistakes and to correct ourselves, to withstand the blows and to hand them out.” Primo Levi
.
Uhh, no that was the former lead singer of the New York Dolls, David Johansson.
Keith
You want brilliance BEFORE I’ve had my coffee!!!
[Int: closeup of a man]
Man: Hi. I’m Morty Sline. You may know me better as “M,” the creator of the late '70’s hit “Pop Musik.” I’d like to take a few minutes of your time to tell you about the good work being done by the OHWPA.
[Fade in to: Ext.-- a disheveled man in a tattered overcoat is lying semi-conscious in an alley.]
V.O.: Peter Schilling. Back in 1982, people on two continents wept openly at his sad tale of “Major Tom,” the austronaut whose final goodbye to his wife from outer space poured out of radions in both English and German. Peter was a huge star…
[The man half-heartedly gets up and begins rummaging through a trash can]
…for about 15 minutes. Then Peter’s royalty checks quickly dried up. He was forced out of his extravagant apartment in Berlin, and turned loose on the street.
[A woman in a long, plain dress and bonnet approaches. She touches Peter gently on the shoulder. He jerks back defensively at first, but calms as she speaks to him.]
V.O.: But thanks to the tireless efforts of OHWRP Missionary Nena, we were able to reach Peter, and help him back on his feet. Nena was able to communicate with him in his native language, and share her own experiences as a one-hit wonder, putting Peter at ease.
[Dissolve: Peter is sitting in a small dorm room, listening to the radio. His face is blank but for a small grin.]
V.O.: Peter is now in rehab at the OHWRP’s Solo Artist Recovery Center in Dresden. OHWRP’s recovery centers have been successful in rehabilitating talentless but lucky solo artists like Peter, Thomas Dolby, and T’Pau.
[Scientists in lab coats and clipboards come in and examine Peter, while his expression stays the same.]
V.O.: Our trained rehab specialists carefully stabilize patients by immersing them in their own hit for several hours. Then, we slowly and carefully begin mixing in music of substance, in an effort to wean them off the shallow melodies, pointeless themes, and senseless lyrics of pop hits. Treatment can take months or years, but with a lot of perseverence, we can return these poor creatures to their natural habitat: the entertainment industry.
[Dissolve to Peter in a track suit, shaking hands with the scientists.]
V.O.: With a few more years of intensive therapy, Peter might be back on his feet as a D.J. in a Trance-Techno club on the outskirts of Prague. He could be writing copy for the BMG Music Service newsletter. Or, if he’s really lucky, he’ll get back into the recording industry, singing harmony on ad jingles for soup.
[Fade in to the grassy lawn of a mental institution. Various patients in straitjackets skitter around on the lawn or stare up at the sky as doctors look on.]
V.O.: But OHWRP needs your help. We’ve had good luck rehabilitating individual solo artists, but for every Peter Schilling we help, we lack the resources to provide suitable treatment to entire bands. The two members of Timbuck 3, four members of Big Country, and the entire nine-piece ensemble of The Jets need the kind of individual attention that we give the solo artists, but there just aren’t enough qualified therapists to go around.
[Morty walks out onto the lawn, and pats a babbling Scottsman on the hea, then turns to the camera]
Morty: We need your help. If you can, send your tax deductible donation to OHWRP, Men’s Room, Penn Station. If you can’t afford to donate, you can still help by refusing to listen to Top 40 radio. We all have to make sacrifices…
[the Scottsman grins crazily, displaying a handful of teeth, and holds up the “Big Country” map]
… but aren’t thse little fellas worth it?
[Cut to OHWRP logo.]
If the OHWRP don’t speak up real soon, I have no doubt about which '90’s band is going to be panhandling for pennies soon.
Speaking of '90’s bands, did the Wallflowers get hit by a car with One Headlight? (Or maybe Jakob Dylan’s father paid him off so he’d stop besmirching the family name in the music industry.)
And, the biggest question of all…does the “Soy Bomb” guy qualify for assistance under the OHWRP?
Chaim Mattis Keller
ckeller@kozmo.com
“Sherlock Holmes once said that once you have eliminated the
impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be
the answer. I, however, do not like to eliminate the impossible.
The impossible often has a kind of integrity to it that the merely improbable lacks.”
– Douglas Adams’s Dirk Gently, Holistic Detective
Not to take any imortance from this worthy cause,
but,
Does anyone know where I can get a copy of Tarzan boy I love that song…
sings off-key…Oooo —A---ooooaahhoaooOaoooahhh…
That song’s got to be on at least one Eighties greatest-hits compilation.
Anyone have any news on the whereabouts of Tiffany, Romeo Void, or the Fat Boys?
TMR
If you believed in yourself, and tore enough holes
in your pants, there was always a mist-filled alley
right around the corner.
Alas, I can not donate any money, but I have a nice fenced in back yard. 
I’ll be glad to use it as a holding cell (er…pen) until rooms are obtained. Or I have a large wooded area behind my house where blinds can be set up to study the subjects as they readjust to “real” life.
well, I have an mp3 of it…does that help?
There is one safeguard known generally to the wise, which is an advantage and security to all,
but especially to democracies as against despots. What is it? Distrust.
– Demosthenes
Joe Cool
What about Golden Earring? They just dropped right off the radar, love. Missing, presumed dead?
Sig! Sig a Sog! Sig it loud! Sig it Strog! – Karen Carpenter with a head cold