If you want to read it:
http://homepages.go.com/~howardandadele/paradox.htm
Who wrote it? My friend said George Carlin wrote it. I don’t disbelieve him (it sounds Carlin-esque), but I’m not convinced.
SterlingNorth
To lying, cheating, stealing, and drinking.
Always lie to save a friend, cheat death,
steal your love’s heart, and drink with good friends.
—*Madison Michele
*
I don’t know. That last part sounds a little too positive to me to be Carlin. But who knows? Don’t take my word for it. That’s just MHO.
White Wolf
“Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.”
“Half the world is composed of idiots, the other half of people clever enough to take indecent advantage of them.”
The last part sounded a little too cliche and “net-trendy.” Unless it was emailed, the part would make no sense.
To lying, cheating, stealing, and drinking.
Always lie to save a friend, cheat death,
steal your love’s heart, and drink with good friends.
—*Madison Michele
*
Carlin? Are you kidding? Find me one clever or original thought in that piece. It’s never Carlin.
This sounds much more like something someone sends to Dear Abby. Or an Amway pitch. (Click here to find out how you can make a difference, style of thing.)
It’s not only not funny (though it’s the sort of thing that should be) but it’s also inaccurate. I see very little there that could really be considered a paradox.
“Waheeey! ‘Duck!’ Get it?”
“Errr… No…”
“Duck! Sounds almost exactly like fu-”
For the record, I got one of these in my e-mail yesterday.
And no… It doesn’t sound like Carlin.
“You can’t run away forever; but there’s nothing wrong with getting a good head start.” — Jim Steinman
Dennis Matheson — Dennis@mountaindiver.com
Hike, Dive, Ski, Climb — www.mountaindiver.com
aseymayo - I agree - sounds exactly like something someone would send to Dear Abby.
IMO, not Carlin…
To me it sounds like Sidney Harris. (Is he still alive and writing a column?)
This site claimes it was written by Rodney Brainard, a student in Texas http://www.bible-reading.com/paradox.html
This site claims it was written by Robert M Hutchins in 1953
http://www.pkal.org/pkal/wisdom/11_16_98.html
This site claims it was George Carlin
http://www-s.cen.uiuc.edu/~eriksson/tqotd/specials/paradox.html
A dozen or so others just say “author unknown”
“The world ends when I die. And as far as I’m concerned, the rest of the universe might as well call it a day too.” – Matt Groening
Ooops. A great example of half-ass researching 
The Robert Hutchins quote is not the OP’s. It’s just a quote that happens to begin with “The most remarkable paradox of our time is that…” It’s not the one in the OP at all.
Reading is Fundamental.
“The world ends when I die. And as far as I’m concerned, the rest of the universe might as well call it a day too.” – Matt Groening
Funny, I got this as an e-mail and it was credited to a student from Columbine High School.
Sorry to all you Carlin fans (of which I am one) but I saw him do that monologue on TV. It’s his. Maybe the man is finally getting a little soft, but hey – how many other comedians can you name who have stayed wickedly, bitingly funny (and timely) for forty years? Not many, I bet.
Live a Lush Life
Da Chef
“For what a man had rather were true, he more readily believes” - Francis Bacon
This kind of thing is so cliched I don’t even know why it is associated with our times. Take out the “hit delete” reference and it could be a reference to someone at any time, harking back to the Golden Age which always took place when the writer was young. If you were born in 1890, you were too young to know that people could be materialistic and selfish until 1907 at earliest. Thus, the Golden Age was the 1890s.
Personally, I think the Golden Age happened from 1992 to 1994. That’s when people played computer games with scaled bitmaps instead of real 3D imaging. They might not have had all the gloss, but they had character. That’s the way it was, and we liked. When I was your age, our computers didn’t even have gigabytes! We dreamed of owning a 500 meg hard drive! My daddy worked as a day trader, 30 hard hours every week, to buy me a 248 meg computer, and I was thankful! And our cell phones were so big you couldn’t fit them in your hip pocket! Oh, you don’t know hardship, my son.
I’ve made my share of typoes, and don’t normally pick on them. But this one was too good to pass up. I wonder how it tasted?
Sidney Harris, late columnist for the Chicago Daily News, passed away a good 15, maybe 20 years ago. If I had any gumption I’d do a web search, but I just don’t care enough…
Is this the same Sterling North who wrote Rascal? I still have my original copy…