So, what do you think happens when you leave a tub of Philadelphia Light Cream Cheese in a dorm fridge in your parents’ attic for 8 years?
I’ll tell you.
It turns brown. And hard. Like plastic. Well maybe more like peanut brittle sans peanuts. Unfortunately I didn’t squeeze it in my hand to feel the exact consistency. Picked it up with two fingers - it FEELS like plastic.
There’s not too much green mold, but there’s some. There are some tiny crystals.
It has no smell.
I am not sure that Philadelphia Light Cream Cheese contains as much milk as we’d like to think.
Don’t worry…i took a picture before throwing it away.
Then I washed my hands.
What, you didn’t taste it?
“Light” cream cheese that’s been buried for eight years is a delicacy amongst the tlhIngan people of Central Asia. Just scrape the mold off, hide any sharp pointy knives you might have lying around, and have someone tie you to a chair first.
That is what happens when you let the spores get out of line.
They… get all hard. And brown.
Consolidated evil!
Surely you’ve just made something a bit like ordinary hard cheese, haven’t you? OK, the conditions are not exactly controlled, but your end result doesn’t sound terribly different to something like parmesan.
You can make glue from milk, so plasic cream cheese is not a supprise. I bet it was a lot like parmesean in a block.
The glue from milk was a Mr. Science experiment from about 1970. It made a great tree wound sealer. I seal a 12 inch wound on a tree and it barked over the wound in about 3 years.
I swear Mangetout wasn’t there when I started typing a response.
I know a girl who owns a 7 year old container of macaroni and cheese. For a while, I thought she meant it was an uncooked box. Wrong.
She said the last time she opened it, it “smelled like sharpie markers”.
Philadelphia cream cheese is brown and one molecule away from being plastic!!!