The Proper Way to Moon

We had a wild New Year’s Eve party. One guest mooned everyone else. Twice.

I always thought that mooning was just pulling your underwear and pants down far enough to show your buttocks. My party guest bent over. Way over. So far over that we all said hello to Mr. Brown Eye.

I do not believe this is the proper way to moon; I further believe that this topic is too mundane and pointless to put in General Questions. Love, Me.

So, what is the proper way to moon?

I used to be an expert at this (in my younger days!):

Pants down, just below buttocks, with enough bend at the waist to produce that nice full “moon” we all know and…love.

“Mr. Brown-eye”::snooty sniff:: he must’ve been an amature!

I’m afraid your guest has bent over to the Dark Side…

I can’t answer this question, but I can tell you how NOT to moon:

Pull your pants down just enough to expose your butt and go for the “pressed ham effect” – by running backwards into a plate glass window.

One of my younger relatives tried this. Yup, he was picking shreds of glass out of his posterior for days.

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Best Moon…out of a passing car. The passanger side window give you a nice arty framing effect.

From my college, someone told me of a fraat boy doing a pressed ham drunk a bit too hard and shattereed the glass with his ass. Said they had to take the joe bent over with shards sticking out of it cheeks. I dunno if it was true but the guy they pointed too sure walked funny for a while (I assume stiches) and had a blow up doughnut.

Can you imagine having to explain this to a parent?

Tyler Durden: You are not your job. You are not the money in your bank account. You are not the car you drive. You are not how much money is in your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis. You are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

Confucius say: Proper way to moon is on rocketship.

I am thoroughly disgusted with you folks!

A real ladydoes not “moon”!!!

A real lady pulls up her top and shakes her boobs out the window of the car.

Really! You cretins!

Lady Kellibelli

Everybody join in and sing “Oh, Canada…” :wink:


“You know how complex women are”

  • Neil Peart, Rush (1993)
      • In the last couple years I have seen that there seems to be a wilder “Women’s Moon” about: push the pants down to the knees, bend over 90 degrees and “grind” the hips in a figure-8 like a dancer. Sometimes the panties go down with the pants and sometimes not but if they do, everything shows. Kinda a three-second peep show. - MC

Sounds like wishful thinking to me.

Ya gotta spread those cheeks and WINK at 'em!! :wink:

“Boy, wouldja get a load of the cloaca on that one”? -Cecil Adams, october 8 1999

Over Christmas vacation, I saw the musical “Rent” in Toledo. In one scene, the character Maureen moons the character Benny.
I had to admire how she did it.
The audience had a side view of the moon. But she did it in such a way, we couldn’t see her uh, pubic hair. Very effective.
Then I had to explain to my daughter about mooning. “Um it’s to show disrespect…like sticking out your tongue at someone…but wait…next time you want to stick your tongue out at someone, don’t do that!”

“Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place.” --John Cleese

That aint the moon, thats a black hole!

Kelli baby… never ever out the window… last time I did that I got so excited I hit the button and almost left mine on the 401 in Ontario when the window rolled up. We canucks definitely shake em with class.

We are, each of us angels with only one wing,and we can only fly by embracing one another

This reminds me of one of my most memorable childhood memories. My grandmother, who is one of those prim and proper ladies, was driving me to school one day. A car drove by with several teenage boys in it. We both looked over at the car, just in time to see two of the boys mooning us. This prim and proper lady (she wears hats and dress gloves when she goes out) took one look and busted out laughing, really hard. Then she starts honking at them, pointing and laughing hysterically. I’m guessing that was not the response they expected from this middle-aged lady, because they quickly sped off.

(wiping tears) it still cracks me up to this day to think about that.

Anyways, I have to agree with Kellibelli…a real lady “does not moon”. The last guy I flashed my boobs at almost crashed his car into a bridge abutment (sp?).

“We are what we pretend to be.”

  • Kurt Vonnegut

Driving back from Florida, I got multi-mooned by a van full of females. They continued their lunar display while they passed the Greyhound bus in front of me.

Brava! Brava!

How am I missing all these women showing off variouse parts of their anatomy?..(sigh)…I must have been a baaaaaadddd man in my past life.

      • I don’t remember how it sounded but it looked pretty darn good!
  • Actually I have mostly seen it at hip-hop/rap type clubs and parties, so I am guessing that it must be prevalent in the associated music videos. And I’ve only seen the undies go down twice; two different girls at the same party. I didn’t get too close, it looked like teen spirit (dunno if it smelled like it). - MC
  • “Insert Nirvanah Jokes Here”