The SDMB Devil's Dictionary

The original Devil’s Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce, was a list of satirical and often rather cynical definitions. For example:

I thought it would be a fun game to come up with some more.

Compromise: 1. Loss of integrity, as in a structure. 2. Loss of integrity, as of a person.

Compromise: An outcome in negotiations where nobody is really happy, but nobody is so unhappy that the negotiators have to sleep with a gun under their pillows.

Debate: An event where two or more people expound on topics, hopefully of interest to the audience, and completely ignore the other speaker(s) arguments.

Cite: a reference to an external source proving that you are right and everyone else is wrong, neener neener neener.

ham·sters sometimes hamp·sters (hăm’sters) n. pl. 1. Voracious creatures rumored to be the power source for message board operations, esp. searches 2. A scapegoat for server or vBulletin problems <the ~ ate my last post>

1920s-style death ray:

  1. Any of several theoretical directed-energy weapons, particularly one claimed to have been invented, but never demonstrated, by Nikola Tesla.

  2. A hoary and tiresome SDMB cliche-meme.

  3. Hi, Opal!

See also Staightdope Message Board, any forum and in relation to any type of post.

Actually, the definition I’ve settled on is:

Compromise: A negotiated situation that is equally unacceptable to all parties.

search (sûrch) v. 1. To explore or probe; to look over in order to find. Generally advised before posting to the General Questions forum. 2. Sorry - no matches. Please try some different terms.

pie: Something that needs to be brought when coming. Not to be confused with pi, which is approximately equal to 3.14159.

Ed Zot·ti (ĕd zŏt’ē) n. see CECIL ADAMS

Ce·cil A·dams (sē’sĭl ăd’ăms) n. see ED ZOTTI

Internet: Embryonic form of the Borg Collective.

Conservative: Reactionary who desires the world more resemble their idealized memory of c. 1949-1954. Contrasting with a Liberal, who desires the world more resemble their idealized memory of c. 1967-1972.

judicial activism: Judges (at any level) abusing their powers by overturning laws you like. Should not be confused with judicial review, when judges properly and in accordance to their powers overturn laws you hate.

kitten: a small carnivorous mammal with a link

Mod–Tyrant known for wearing a hat, jackboots, and nothing else.

Parents Television Council—A social club for persons who didn’t watch Jonny Quest as children.

Corporation " A legal entity that acts as a person, but not in my back yard (NIMBY)"


Nazi (n.): 1. A member of the National Socialist Workers Party of Germany, c. 1920-1945, most notoriously led by Adolf Hitler. 2. Any jerk whose views are to the right of you. 3. Epithet virtually guaranteed to get a thread closed.

**Patience: ** A trait of an intelligent person, which should be exhibited when evaluating: 1) early bad news about a person with whom you agree 2) early good news about a person with whom you disagree