The Text The Preamble To The US Constitution Challange

[Markxxx]

I saw a blip on our local news about texting messages and the effect it is having on kids and spelling and grammar. As kids use text via their cell phones, so they are using a shorthand type of deal.

OK so I thought this would make an interesting challange.

Who here can text the preamble to the US Constitution in the shortest possible number of characters. Of course it has to be readable to the average reader and I do realize this is subjective. There’s really no right and wrong to if it’s readable.

But I am not good at shorthand texting on phones, but I’m sure others here are experts

Here’s the preamble:

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

So who can do this, to keep it readable and the meaning the same, but in the shortest possible way. Using the type of shorthand you’d use on a cell phone

[Note: yeah I spelled challenge wrong, if a mod reads this can you fix it. Thanks]

[TheChileanBlob]

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

[Oakminster]

Sorry. I am incapable of reciting the Preamble without singing it. It’s the curse of my generation.

[beowulff]

Here you go.

[Moonlitherial]

@Oakminster

Sorry. I am incapable of reciting the Preamble without singing it. It’s the curse of my generation.

I couldn’t quote a single word from the Canadian constitution but I can damn well sing the Preamble to the US Constitution.

Okay I’m pretty sure there is a “the” in there somewhere, but you know what I mean.

[Carl_Corey]

@Oakminster

Sorry. I am incapable of reciting the Preamble without singing it. It’s the curse of my generation.

Ditto.

[Hari_Seldon]

@Moonlitherial

@Oakminster

Sorry. I am incapable of reciting the Preamble without singing it. It’s the curse of my generation.

I couldn’t quote a single word from the Canadian constitution but I can damn well sing the Preamble to the US Constitution.

Okay I’m pretty sure there is a “the” in there somewhere, but you know what I mean.

You mean you don’t recall the most important word in the whole document: “Notwithstanding”?

For Bnited Merkins, this is the clause that says that they legislature can make any law (nearly) that contradicts the “Charter of rights” just by saying this law shall have effect notwithstanding the charter. As far as I am concerned, this clause negates the whole charter.

[Blue_Mood]

@TheChileanBlob

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

Impressive! But I read “gnrl” with a hard g sound.

[Markxxx]

@TheChileanBlob

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

Impressive but shouldn’t it be like “ordr 2” or or “cnstitushn 4”? I ask 'cause order to, is two words. It makes sense for 4m because form is one word

[TheChileanBlob]

@Markxxx

@TheChileanBlob

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

Impressive but shouldn’t it be like “ordr 2” or or “cnstitushn 4”? I ask 'cause order to, is two words. It makes sense for 4m because form is one word

Yeah, my husband and I text each other constantly and it’s kind of our thing to use as much textspeak as we can. Also, we’re both very prolific texters, so we cram words together when necessary, and therefore append 2 and 4 to the beginnings or ends of words.

[TheChileanBlob]

@Blue_Mood

@TheChileanBlob

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

Impressive! But I read “gnrl” with a hard g sound.

Hmm, didn’t think of that. I guess it should be jnrl.

[Sage_Rat]

We peeps of US, wantn 2 have goodinz, nao establsh the US.

Everything else is just meaningless flourish and can be dropped.

[mnemosyne]

@Hari_Seldon

You mean you don’t recall the most important word in the whole document: “Notwithstanding”?

For Bnited Merkins, this is the clause that says that they legislature can make any law (nearly) that contradicts the “Charter of rights” just by saying this law shall have effect notwithstanding the charter. As far as I am concerned, this clause negates the whole charter.

Hence, Québec!

::d&r::

[BigT]

General can always use the abbreviation gen.

My full abreviation would be:

We d ppl/tUS,N ord2frm a mo prfct union,est just,prov dmstc tranq,prov4d comn def,prmt d gen Wlfre&scur d bless/lib2rselv&r Pstrty,do ordn&Stblsh dis const4tUSA

Crud, that’s still 162 characters. We’ve got to get it down to 140 before it is truly textable. I’m not counting the lolcats version, as it doesn’t tell what goodinz are.

I personally tried to keep all the words. I removed spaces before numbers and symbols, and used common abbreviations for words if they existed. Some are only decipherable in context, but that’s the same as in texts.

It is a bit more jumbled than I hoped, though. But adding the spaces back takes it to 174

[Markxxx]

Anyone wanna try doing the Lord’s Prayer?

[Ferret_Herder]

@TheChileanBlob

cnstitushn4

Awesome - you might save a single character by rendering this as “cnsti2shn4”, though.

[TheChileanBlob]

@Ferret_Herder

@TheChileanBlob

cnstitushn4

Awesome - you might save a single character by rendering this as “cnsti2shn4”, though.

:smack:

My husband is better.

[Polycarp]

@Blue_Mood

@TheChileanBlob

We da ppl o da US n ordr2 4m a mor prfct union stablsh justis nshr dmstc tranqiliT prvd4 da cmn dfns promot da gnrl welfar n secr da blsngs o librT 2 Rselvs n r psteriT do rdain n Stablsh dis cnstitushn4 da USA

Impressive! But I read “gnrl” with a hard g sound.

Th gnrls com frm th vodvrk out.

[Ann_Onimous]

@Oakminster

Sorry. I am incapable of reciting the Preamble without singing it. It’s the curse of my generation.

@Carl_Corey

Ditto.

Double ditto. I sang it in fifth grade when we had to memorize and recite it. Got extra credit!

[Civil_Guy]

@Markxxx

Anyone wanna try doing the Lord’s Prayer?

I’m not sure this all that good - but what the heck:

Ceiling cat da best.CC ovrlord welkum,+1 wha CC sez, here / ceiling. CC give us bread,k,& plz scuse our bad,same we scuse others.Keep us from scum ideas and from eevl-CC got da bestest hood, da watts, da respek, 4 evah.Word.