The worst guest bed

I once stayed at a friend’s place and he gave us his bedroom so we, that is my five-year-old daughter and me, could have his single bed while he slept on the living room couch.

He had maybe 12 scorpions, 6 lizards, and several snakes including a 6-foot-long Burmese python, which had bit me the same day, leaving a remarkably clean and painless hole in my finger that you could see daylight through.

(Pythons aren’t venomous - I assume they use their bite as an anchor before wrapping around their prey, but fortunately this one just bit).

It was an interesting night’s sleep, hearing the crickets that were in the tanks for food chirping away, then the reptiles waking up, lots of rustling and slithering, and the chirping suddenly ceasing.

I have a friend who built a Murphy bed which seems to be the best option. I’ve spent enough time tossing and turning on a hide-a-bed to vote for hotel rooms whenever feasable.

I have used air mattresses when camping. Generally, they behave fairly well, but if the temperature is going to dip cold at night, expect the air to become more dense and the bed to need topping up. Then, you need to let some of that air out if the day will be hot, lest it stretch the bed to the point of leaking during the day.

This weekend, I’m taking my chances and staying with a friend. She has a guest bed, but I don’t know more than that. I am bringing my own pillow. I’d prefer a hotel but am too broke to pony up for even a cheap one. I am grateful to my friend, but my bad back has me concerned that I won’t sleep well.