Umm, everyone’s listed sitcoms so far, so I’m going to interject the Chevy Chase Show, the Martin Short Show, and the Magic Show all tied for crappiest attempt at a late-night type talk show. I love Chevy Chase and all, but for God’s sake, WHAT were they thinking? That’s FOX for you, though, if not for their recent cartoons plus the X-Files and Simpsons, that network would be a complete waste of electromagnetic waves.
Guiness World Records on Fox. Is that show still on? I watched the first two episodes, and they were half-way OK. But it escalated into a freak show. And more than half the program is commercials. What garbage.
Other choices:
Sister-Sister.
Boston Common.
Married With Children.
Jerry Springer.
ANY soap opera. (Well, if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen 'em all)
Adam
“Life is hard…but God is good”
I just remembered this one:
Herman’s Head
I think it was also a FOX show.
Does anyone remember a show called “Grand” that supposedly was about a family who’s fortune was in the grand piano business? It was supposed to be like a slapsticky spoof of shows like “Dallas” or something and just reeked to high heaven!
I never really realized how BAD “CHiPs” was until I saw an episode recently … oh my GOD. You can practically read the stage direction off the screen it’s so wooden. You can practically see people mouthing eachother’s lines as they anticipate their cue. Also, I always thought of the show as “the cute guy” and Ponch. Apparently the rest of the world somehow saw it the other way around, or at least the show’s producers did… they were always writing the ever-so-repulsive Ponch into all the leering-at-women scenes. Watching it again as an adult I see that John isn’t really that cute, he’s more of a goober, but he is several miles above Ponch.
Now on to some other shows…
Puttin’ On the Hits was an ok show, but what was that horrid MTV ripoff of it that was on for a while? They had like teams of people and they’d make them lipsynch to songs they didn’t know and all kinds of horrid things.
My vote gets added here for Full House, Family Matters, and Saved by the Bell also…
Do cartoons count? Smurfs. Snorks (aka “underwater smurfs”). Sailor Moon.
Three’s a Crowd
Roc
Anything with Sinbad
Who’s the Boss
Whatever that spinoff of Dukes of Hazzard was called
StarMan
Doogie Howser, MD
Barney & Friends
I’ll be back when I think of more.
>^,^<
“Cluemobile? You’ve got a pickup…”
OpalCat’s site: http://fathom.org/opalcat
The Teeming Millions Homepage: fathom.org/teemingmillions
For the record, Married with Children is funny.
I have the new worst show of all time, no contest.
<font size=7>Cop Rock</font>
I don’t know how I missed it before. Probably blocking out the pain.
<center><big><big><font face=“Comic Sans MS” color=“ff0000”>Strangers With Candy</font></big></big></center>
>^,^<
“Cluemobile? You’ve got a pickup…”
OpalCat’s site: http://fathom.org/opalcat
The Teeming Millions Homepage: fathom.org/teemingmillions
I don’t think anyone has come up with a show that has been worse than Small Wonder. Yes, I think practically everything on the list is bad (except for Xena Lesbian Princess).
How about we try listing a top five list of these awful shows?
SC
Omniscient, you stole my trump card! Bastard! 
I’ll just have to add X-Files to the list instead. Of course, I’ll then have to dodge all the flames from fans who haven’t noticed the wooden dialog, repetitive storylines, and lack of anything that could ever be considered ‘acting’.
(That last is not quite true; some of the extras have done good death scenes. But I have yet to see anything decent from Fox “One Facial Expression For The Past Five Years” Mulder or Dana “Don’t I Look Cute When I’m Skeptical” Scully.)
Of course I don’t fit in; I’m part of a better puzzle.
Omni, you putz! Damn. Years of therapy right out the freakin’ window. Steven Bochko (sp?) ought to be strung up for even pitching that concept.
I’d have to agree with Small wonder and Full House. BTW, didn’t the phrase “How Rude!” that Jar Jar Binks kept saying come from Full House. I think the middle sister always said it.
(How do I know this, I was forced to watch this show growing up with three females and one TV) The Horror!
Hey, this sounds like the series starring Lee Van Cleef and one of the Van Patten kids. It was repackaged into movies by some Japanese company and so became fair game for MST3K. If you get a chance, see the MySTified versions Master Ninja I and Master Ninja II. They’re hilarious.
AuraSeer -
If you get flamed for the XF comment, I’ll be right there with you. X-Files used to be okay, but has degenerated into “Look, an alien, Scully!” “No, it’s not, Mulder!” Someone put them out of their freaking misery!
As for other bad shows…
Full House
Family Matters
Secret Diary of Desmond Pfieffer
Actually, damn near anything on UPN or WB.
“You have to laugh at yourself, because you’d cry your eyes out if you didn’t.”
-Emily Saliers
I’m with you on X-Files, too; haven’t watched it in two or three years. They fell prey to the Picket Fences/Twin Peaks syndrome: taking themselves WAY too seriously.
I’ve also been watching some of my favorite childhood TV shows in rerun and realizing that, as good as they were when I was 8, Petticoat Junction, The Beverly Hillbillies and even the vaunted Laugh-In are unbearable now. The only one that holds up is the surreal, Dada-esque Green Acres. “Zis has been a Filmvays presentation, dahling.”
60 Minutes tops my list of all time bad shows. When was the last time you saw so many lies, misconceptions, and shoddy research in one place. The show’s so slanted, it’s flat.
I’m in the age group that’s supposed to swoon over boy bands, refer to Wednesday as “Dawson’s Creek day”, and cover my room in Leonardo DiCaprio posters.(shudder) Dispite what’s expected of me, I refuse to watch ANY of the following shows-
*Dawson’s Creek
*Buffy the Vampire Slayer
*TRL
*Any Aaron Spelling, or Kevin Williamson show
*Party of Five
*Moesha
*And many many more…
While most of my friends fall into this downward spirol and become hooked on the WB, I just sit back and watch MST3K, The Simpsons, and laugh histerically.(o:
Besides those, I think the worst TV shows of all time have got to be-
*My Brother and me
*Baywatch (Surprised it hasn’e been mentioned)
*Teen Angel
*Family Matters
*Small Wonder
*Zoobaly Zoo
*And of course- Full House. Even though they had the hilarious Bob Saget and those oh-so-cute Olsen twins. (I shouldn’t even have to tell you how sarcastic I’m being.)
Dear God, man! First you guys start bashing X-files, then someones goes and speaks ill of Baywatch. I need to start reconsidering who I associate with online!!!
For the record: Stand up commedians should never do TV sitcoms.
Exception: Home Improvement
I agree with Small Wonder being bad, and the only show that I can think of that was worse was called Open All Night…I think it ran for 3 consecutive weeks before it (mercifully) died. Geeze! That show sucked!
–Kalél
Common ¢ for all ages…
Doncha just hate word problems?
“<FONT COLOR=”#000000" size=“1” FACE=“Verdana, Arial”>If it takes a four-month old woodpecker, with a rubber bill, 9 months and 13 days to peck a hole through a Cypress log that is big enough to make 117 shingles, and it takes 165 shingles to make a bundle worth 93¢, how long will it take a cross-eyed grasshopper, with a cork leg, to kick all the seeds out of a dill pickle?"
I hate it when that happens!
–Kalél
Common ¢ for all ages…
Doncha just hate word problems?
“If it takes a four-month old woodpecker, with a rubber bill, 9 months and 13 days to peck a hole through a Cypress log that is big enough to make 117 shingles, and it takes 165 shingles to make a bundle worth 93¢, how long will it take a cross-eyed grasshopper, with a cork leg, to kick all the seeds out of a dill pickle?”
You need to consider availabity/ubiquitousness as well. By that standard, Small Wonder (which is probably showing RIGHT NOW in syndication somewhere) is much worse than Cop Rock, which I have managed to avoid completely.
After all, it doesn’t really matter very much how awful a show was if it aired exactly once, on channel 83, at 4:00 AM Sunday morning.
I’d also like to submit “Good Times” and televised golf and/or bowling (particularly candlepin bowling) for consideration.
In closing, I’d like to take my revenge on those of you who have managed to get my brain stuck on the theme song from Small Wonder by returning the favor:
“Ssshee’s a smmaaaallll… wonnn-derrrrr…”
Thank you.