I was perusing the Village Voice this morning, when I came upon what just might be the weirdest advertisment I’ve seen (even in that paper).
There is a theme restaurant at 24 First Ave. called La Nouvelle Justine, which bills itself as “the S&M cafe.” Its website features the charming tagline “Service with a Sneer.” Aparrently it’s been in business for three years, and has attracted the usual band of minor celebrities.
Since, clearly, my imagination is not up to the job, what other theme restaurants do you Dopers know of (or wish existed)?
I’m your only friend
I’m not your only friend
But I’m a little glowing friend
But really I’m not actually your friend
But I am
Well, there’s Dick’s Last Resort. I know of locations in Dallas and Atlanta. Their schtick is that all the waiters are rude. They yell at the customers and abuse them mercilessly. “Waiter, can I have some more water?” “Sure you can. You can wait 'til I’m good and ready or you can GET OFF YOUR FAT ASS AND GET IT YOURSELF.”
Interesting concept, but gets old fast.
After all, what is your hosts’ purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they’d have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi. – P. J. O’Rourke
Ace, the Nouvelle Justine is strictly for the tourist trade—ya want a REAL S&M joint, let me know and I’ll take you to some joints in the East Village . . .
I was always amused by the concept of the short-lived Model Café, run by three fashion models. Was the entrée one-third of a carrot stick, served with water? Dessert was a few Saltine crumbs? Did they have sufficient rest rooms so you could woof up your dinner right after eating?
Thanks, Eve, but I wasn’t so much looking for a place to eat as wondering aloud at what some people will pay for. I mean, in most restaurants, if the server is rude, demanding and violent, you could complain to the management, but that appears to be the point of this place.
I’m your only friend
I’m not your only friend
But I’m a little glowing friend
But really I’m not actually your friend
But I am
Dr. J, there’s a Dick’s Last Resort here in Denver as well. And, in agreement with you fully, it does get old in a hurry.
My question is: How do you tip at a restaurant where they’re supposed to be rude to you? 15% if they’re merely snotty, bump it up to 20% if they actually spit on your food?
It looks to me like the point of this place is not so much to receive poor service as to receive public humiliation at the hands of a dominatrix. Or to spank your waitress, whichever you prefer. (Wash your hands before eating!)
Now, this place Dr. J is talking about, THAT sounds more like it! Years ago, a friend and I came up with an idea for a restaurant to be called Abraxas of the Bronx. It would be located in an inconvenient neighborhood, would serve horrid food and sour wines, and would feature ghastly, rude service. Busboys would drop platters of china with deafening crashes. Overcharging would be routine. The jukebox would have Lou Reed’s Metal Machine Music playing on an endless loop. Even the NAME of the joint was grating and unpleasant.
We figured the Masters of the Universe-types and their debutante dates would eat it up.
" . . . It would be located in an inconvenient neighborhood, would serve horrid food and sour
wines, and would feature ghastly, rude service. Busboys would drop platters of china with deafening crashes. Overcharging would be routine. The jukebox would have Lou Reed’s Metal Machine Music playing on an endless loop."
—Yer too late, Ike. It’s called Minelli’s, and it’s in Wayne, Penna.
Anyone ever been to the Tournament of Kings at the Excalibur in Vegas? I want a retaurant that serves food like that. No silverware, just a damp towel. Bring out whole birds or other food you have to tear apart and eat with your hands. Have swords and armor and other metal pointy things around. Hire people to wander around and tell bawdy jokes and get in brawls (away from the straights of course). Employ busty barmaids in bodices. (Mmm… bodices…)
That, or I’d go the other extreme. Only it’d be more of a club. I want to recreate the club from the movie “Hackers”. That was pretty damn cool. Black paint and electrons everywhere.
I’m sort of surprised that no one has mentioned “Jeckyl and Hyde’s” on the existing list. Then again, there are only three of them (and why WE have one I’ll never know).
Victorian Gothic setting. The walls are “black castle stone,” the floors are painted black, there are “bodies” everywhere, animatronic ghouls and other freaky beasties, “cast members” walking around in costume and harassing the guests, a wacky menu (the bar is great, lots of test tubes) … an interesting experience.
What about a Victoria’ Secret restaurant. I haven’t come up with more of a plan than beautiful women wearing lingerie, but would I really need anything more…?
