I’m trying to perform a rather delicate operation with a large dictionary. I’d like to cut a square hole in the second half, say from the letter N to the last page. It needs to be large enough to hold a 1.5 inch cube.
How can I do this without ripping the pages to shreds? To cut the hole, the dictionary must be open. How do I account for the angle in the hole that this creates? Are there professionals who are capable of doing such a thing?
Those fakes books I’ve seen for holding valuables won’t do the trick. It must be a dictionary and must look completely normal until one gets to the page where the hole begins.
Prop the spine open to verical. You should still be able to flip the A-M pages back so you can work on the M-Z pages without the angle. Or more easily, since you plan to destroy the book anyway, break the spine.
Then I would just get out my trusty exacto knife, and start cutting. It will take a while, but the hole isn’t going to be big.
If you don’t like that idea, or you’re in a hurry, try drilling a pilot hole, and use a carpet knife. This definately won’t be as delicate, but it should be faster.
Thanks for all the responses. I still haven’t decided which route to take. I even considered the controlled burn for a brief few seconds (until I started imagining my hardwood floor burning off my winter chill).
Sue, I’m proposing.
Reader’s Digest Condensed version:
I’m the first boyfriend in my lady’s past who has ever beaten her at Scrabble. After 5 games she has yet to win. In one game I used the word Ni, thinking for some reason that it was an Olde English greeting. It wasn’t in any dictionary we had handy, and has become sort of a running joke. I’m getting her a rather expensive art book for her birthday and thought I’d wrap both it and a large dictionary in such a way that she would see they were both books. This will hopefully put off any suspicions that I was going to pop the question that evening. After opening her other book, then proceeding to unwrap the dictionary, I’ll say something along the lines of “I finally found a dictionary that has the word Ni in it” and take it from there.
I’ve never actually attempted this, but if I had to, I’d take a 2.5" circular drill bit, and just start drilling. I have an inkling that the pages would bind to the teeth in the bit, thus ripping out all of the pages, but it’s worth a shot. It might be a good idea to get two dictionaries…
If you go the drill route, clamp the dictionary with at least two (better, more) C-clamps or something which will hold pages together, and do not force the hollow saw, let it make a good hole. Consider gluing sections of the book together first. Nice weekend project. I wish my life were as filled. And a wife at the end of it. Wow!
I can say from experience that a drill and a jigsaw will definitely work for this. Clamp the pages together on at least the two outer corners first, then draw in the shape of your hole. Drill a starter hole at one or more corner, insert the jigsaw, and get to work. You might also want to put a thin wood board on either side of the area to be sawn, to provide a nice, stiff backing.
Also make sure that you get a dictionary that’s thick enough for “n-z” to hold your box
Funny, I just tried to do this very same thing–but for different reasons. I was trying to smuggle drugs.
I used the X-Acto knife method, and it worked out great. The trick is to do a couple of pages at a time, flip them to the other side, and then do a couple more, using the last “cut” page as a guide. Time consuming, yes, but the book looks normal when closed.
Green Bean, at least have you read the dictionary while slowly cutting? If yes, can you call youself “an educated” or “well read” trafficker? Or, since you did not get a chnce to read M-Z pages, “half-read”?
Ah, that would explain the context I heard it in, “Of knights who say Ni!”
I think I’m going to go for the jigsaw idea courtesy of Chronos. Those fat dictionarys are too expensive to leave it up to experimentation. I still like the controlled burn, I might try that in a safe place with a cheap used book.
Thanks for all the ideas. I hope she’s as surprised as I think she’ll be.
One time, I used the word Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-Ekki-PTANG-zoom-Boing-Z’nourrwringmm in a Scrabble game. Triple word score too! Those cheating bastards wouldn’t let me use it though.
Good to know your soon to be fiance is a bit more accepting on alternate words.
Awright. I admit it. I wasn’t actually trying to smuggle drugs. I was making a place to keep my drugs on the off chance that I ever obtain any.
And tho I am not a trafficker, I am well-educated. Very well-educated. Over-educated. Oy, am I educated! Am I bragging? No, I am lamenting, because I start my job search tomorrow, and I am afraid that my surplus of education will prove to be a liability rather than an asset. Perhaps I should look into a trafficking career. But that’s a topic for another day, another thread, and another forum…
A hole saw should work quite well for this kind of project. Take the Ni-Z section of the book, minus the back cover and clamp it tightly between two rigid sheets of wood panelling or other similar material. Drill right through it all, including the panelling. The trick of getting through the paper without making a mess is to use a fresh hole saw and to go very slowly at high rpm. A drill press would be more suitable than a hand drill for this. A little glue around the inside of the resulting hole and sticking the backing page to the rear cover would help stabilize the hole and keep your surprise from falling out if the book is not well-supported when she opens it. I’d also recommend a light adhesive, like a very thin bead of rubber cement, to hold the ring in place inside the “book” to help avoid rattling.
