No can do . . . It involves the n-word, which is one of half-a-dozen or so that never leave my keyboard . . .
Three women were in the waiting room of a gynecologist, and each of them was knitting a sweater for their baby-to-be. The first one stopped and took a pill. “What was that?” the others asked her. “Oh, it was Vitamin C - I want my baby to be healthy.” A few minutes later, another woman took a pill. “What was that?” the others asked. “Oh, it was iron - I want my baby to be big and strong.” They continued knitting. Finally the third woman took a pill. “What was that?” the others asked her. “It was thalidomide,” she said, “I just can’t get the arms right on this sweater!”
[SUB]Jeez, it’s getting hot down here…[/sub]
Q: What’s the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
A: It only takes one nail to hang up a picture of Jesus.
I am SO going to Hell for that one.
Why is Jesus so popular with the ladies?
holds arms out Because he’s hung like this.
Insert “Elephant” into the joke wherever a bad word is used. We’ll have to get the sick humor by pure logic.
What kind of file is used to make a small hole bigger?
A pedophile
So this Elephant had always wanted to go on an English fox hunt. He saved and saved and finally flew over and got set up with some proper English gentlemen. They got him a nice bay horse to ride, a vest that fit and the proper hat.
So they all take off across the English countryside and one of the proper English gentlemen comes riding over to the Elephant and he says “Now listen, whenever you see the fox be sure and yell out so we’ll all know to go over and get him.” The Elephant says okay and they take off again.
Sure enough, it’s the Elephant that sees the fox first so he hollers out. After it’s all over and they’re riding back to the manor, the English gentleman rides back over to the Elephant and says "Now listen, next time you see the fox, be sure and holler out Tally ho, the fox and not Dere da mutherfucker go.
Q: Why can’t a lesbian be on a diet and wear make-up at the same time?
A:Because she can’t eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on her face.
NO JOKE THREADS IN THE PIT! NO JOKE THREADS IN THE PIT! How many times do I have to say it?
lno and Rhum Runner, as the starters of this trend, I’m holding BOTH of you personally responsible. But especially lno.
Lynn
For the Straight Dope