Ooh! Ooh! I know!
Sayyyyy, where’d Hal sneak off to - and was anybody else with him in here while we were on break?
WhyNot and Draelin are dangerous.
I better finish this autopsy before somebody gets HURT.
Let’s ignore the rest of the findings below the diaphragm. Check out these lungs. Now these are perfect lungs. Almost no anthracotic staining; couldn’t have been a smoker, must just have done a little city living. Very slightly hyperinflated - did you have a touch of asthma in childhood, indecisive1? Not that you know of? Ah well, I could tell you know, but you’re dead.
But wait. What’s this? Why is the pericardial sac so dark and blue? Is it full of… blood???
It is! It is full of blood!
Somebody get a measuring cup – No, not that one, that’s for egg salad - The big one, the metal one with the numbers marked on the inside.
Wow. 400 cc. Cardiac tamponade. No wonder the blood was easy to draw.
(From the right subclavian, picunurse.)
How did this happen? indecisive1 was way too young to have a myocardial infarct. How did the blood get out of the heart??
Ooh, let’s see! I bet you’re right!
My God. This heart is shredded. It’s in pieces. Two pieces.
I’ve never seen a heart lacerated in half like this. (Well, I have, but it usually involved ballistic projectiles.) This is a heart without external signs of injury. Yet here it is hanging in two.
There’s only one thing I can say about this which would explain her cause of death.
Her heart was torn.
Well, she was the indecisive1…
YaWanna, It’s up to you, if you want to play the odds. (odds are ** indecisive1**isn’t positive for either) I think I have a bandaid in my backpack.
gabriela, I asked before, did you canulate the left or right subclavian?
:smack:
BOO! HISSSSS!
My god, you’re a fantastic Doper, gabriela.
You mean, she died from a broken heart?
Man, we wuz all set up!
Best. Shaggy Dog Thread. Ever.
I declare this autopsy over!! Anybody still here in five posts will be required to help CLEAN UP.
WhyNot, since you’re the mom, would you take all the sliced up organs in the kick bucket and throw’em back into indecisive1’s body. She has some sort of meeting to make on Monday.
We’ll do this again sometime to a new victi- to another volunteer when y’all have healed.
I mean from the pun.
That was fun. Let’s all go for beers now - I’ll buy the first round.
I think Mr. Bus Guy is in the bathroom being sick. You told him to suck the egg salad off the brain. He didn’t use the yankauer suction handle. :rolleyes: He didn’t use the wall suction… at all…
Okay, I’m laughing.
Now, let’s hear that indecisive1 was actually a sock puppet, and let gabriela go out on a high point- because I’m reasonably certain that nothing she can ever do will rival this!
Hey, I’m right here, juggling away! (check post 118)
:slip:
Oh dear…tourniquet, someone? Please?
Hal Briston, the hose is over there, you can meet us at the pub when you’re done. Here’s my last band aid…stop whining, I can barely see the cut!.
All right, y’all. Clean up. It’s only blood and guts.
I absolve Hal of suspicion in the source of the white opaque stuff. He was juggling work and scalpels the entire time. No way he could have multitasked beyond that.
Happy Clam (takes a bow), you’re too kind… but you don’t know me yet.
I need a beer! Last to clean up turn out the lights and meet us at the bar!!! Yay!!! Let’s go hoist one to the true goddess of the party:
indecisive1.
In memoriam.
gabriela, May I e-mail you with a question?
Or could you e-mail me? (I see your address isn’t public) I have an autopsy question that I’d rather not ask publicly.