Anyone who tells you “But it was only a cat!” deserves to be lined up against the wall and shot.
She was NOT only a cat. She was a member of the family and your very good friend. She was a part of your life and part of your soul. She will be sorely missed.
I know. I’ve been there – too often. Every cat I’ve ever owned was put down, and NOT when I was available to be there. So I never got to say goodbye, either.
I comfort myself with the fact that they all had good, happy, healthy lives. They ate regularly (perhaps TOO regularly), had a roof over their heads, were warm in winter and cool in summer, and had all the attention they could ever want.
Meanwhile, my heart goes out to you. ((((((ladyfoxfyr))))))
Oh love, I am so sorry you are going thru this.
My mom just had my cat put to sleep last year. She was the last on living out of the three we had. Her brothers were put down the year before.
My mom called me each time she had to take one of them in. They were all 14 years old so I understood why. Their quality of life wasn’t there anymore, and it was harder to see them suffer.
The only one I didn’t go to the vet with was my cat Mickey. I couldn’t deal with it. I went to see her the night before and spent some time with her. I got her when I was 15 and she went thru alot with me. A wonderful listener and a great buddy for a teen cramming for high school finals.
When I went to see my moms cat when she took him in I held him right before. I was doing fine with everything until he tried to push me away. That is when I lost it. You see it was a family joke. I used to pick him up and “cuddle” him. He hated it. I would pick him up and tell him how cuddly he was the whole time he was pushing away trying to escape my attention.
The last day he just laid around half dead already and my mom said he just wasn’t himself. So, I picked him up and went into the old routine of “cuddling” him. (kind of like the bugs bunny cartoon with the abominable snow man and the bunny “I want a bunny to pet and hold and cuddle and I will call him George” If that clears it up for you guys on the routine) He actually perked up a bit and pushed me away.
Okay, back to my Mickey. When my mom called me to tell me she was going I went the night before and spent my time with her.
My husband the insensitive ass about the whole deal told me that under no circumstances was I to bring home my cats ashes. (My mom has her brothers ashes in beautiful boxes with their pictures on them).
He told me it was stupid and wrong to be that attached to an animal. (Can he be first for that line-up against that wall?)
I am sorry for your loss, and everyone should have a chance to say goodbye. I suffered the other extreme. My beloved dog of 12+ years was having heart and kidney failure, and it was only humane to let him go gently. So we made an appointment - for the next day. We had that evening to be with him. And when we woke up, we had to sit and hold him and go about our morning knowing that at noon we were going to take him and have his life ended. I have never been torn up inside as much as I was on that day.
So far I haven’t had anyone say yet that it was “just a cat” but I have only told my friends and they all know how I feel about my pets. They aren’t pets. They are parts of the family, closer to me than even my own family members, because they are innocent. They love without end.
I have seen animals abused and mistreated in the arms of evil, and yet, they love still.
I lost my first cat when I was 15. She wasn’t put to sleep–we suspected she was sick, and terminally so, even though she never showed signs of pain. One day she just wandered off and never came back…that’s when we knew she’d died. She never wandered away from home.
I have a “new” kitty now, he’s about two years old. He’s a punk but I love him, and I know I’m going to have a hard time dealing with his death.
My condolances over the loss of your pet. Not being able to say goodbye is a terrible thing. I lost 2 cats about 2 years ago within a month of each other. Ironically, I was at work when both of them died. I’m a vet tech. While my kitties passed away at home, without me, I was busy saving the lives of other people’s pets.
ladyfoxfire, I am so sorry about your loss. We had to put our dog down on Monday, and it tore us up, even though we knew about it and had planned it. I cannot imagine how you felt when you found out after the fact. Please accept my condolences
I’m so sorry ladyfoxfire, not being able to say goodbye is a terrible feeling.
I stopped being a huge cat fan after my last favorite died about three years ago. She was elderly though, and the one it hurt to lose most was my mom’s cat Toi who died this past winter. You see, I bought Toi for my mom. Her siamese Coco died of Feline Lukimia when I was a junior in high school, and she really wanted another one. So I got my first ever non-babysitting job and earned the money to buy her Toi- a 3 month old seal point. He was a goofy kitten with enormous ears, that we thought he’d grow into but didn’t. He was a sweetie, and it was devastating to find out that he had incurable cancer when he was only 5 years old. I still miss him.
My deepest condolences on your loss. My own kitty died about a year ago at the ripe old age of 17, I am still pining away for my poor kitty, so I understand how you feel. Darn it, now I’m starting to cry.
…I don’t know what to say. I would hate it if my cat (who might not see another christmas :(:() was put down without me there to say goodbye. First thing I did was run to my mom and tell her to make sure I was there if we have to do it… wipes away tear
Briefly: Princess, who was 17, was put down when I was out of the country. However, she was seriously ill and essentially nonresponsive. This had been my cat since I was 4. Totally broke my heart.
Lady was 13. She wasn’t sick. Mom promised to care for her when I had to move and the place didn’t take cats. I show up on Thanksgiving, walk around shaking the Pounce can, calling “Here kitty kitty!”, and Mom tells me “We had her put down last week.” She wasn’t sick. Mom was just sick of her, and no one seemed to want her. Not that she asked for my help. Bitter, bitter, bitter.
I coped by going to chat rooms and commiserating with cat lovers who shared my horror, heartbreak, and fury. I also called cat-loving friends who would do the same. And believe it or not, I wrote poetry about her. Grieving over a pet may seem silly to some, but it is very real for a a great many of us, so ignore or otherwise flip off the insensitive ones and bond with the sympathetic ones.
