::::crying::::
:::sobbing::::
:::puffy eyes:::
They had my cat put to sleep this morning. Nobody told me before they left with her, but my mom called me just a few minutes ago and told me.
They didn’t let me say goodbye. I know there was a better way than to kill her. I would have kept her in my room, with her own separate food, I would have given her her pills 3 times a day, no problem. I would have kept a stinky litter box in my room and cleaned it every day.
It didn’t have to be like this.
Not like this. She was too sweet to put down. But they did it anyway. Without even waking me.
:::crying:::
:::sobbing:::
:::puffy eyes:::
I’m so sorry for your loss! I know you must be crushed…sometimes I like my cat more than my family!
You can have my shoulder to cry on!
–==the sax man==–
You don’t say what was wrong with her or who took her away.
I’m so, so, so sorry. I love my cat with fierce protective mother-love and if anything happened to her I’d be devastated.
{{{{{ladyfoxfyre}}}}}
I can’t imagine how you must be feeling. I’m so sorry! Here, have a virtual purr from my cat – he has the loveliest deep, resonating purr.
You poor dear. I’m so sorry to hear this. They should at least have let you say goodbye. Here, have some hugs. I love my cats and would be very upset if anyone did that to one of my babies. Here’s a whole new box of kleenexes too. I’m only an email away if you want to talk.
{{{{{{ladyfoxfyre}}}}}}
Oops. That’s what I get for wanting to offer comfort, and not remembering that my son posted last. The previous post from luminousman was actually from me.
Sorry, son.
oh babe…I’m sorry. It sucks to have a pet put sleep anyway, but to not even be able to say goodbye…
I’ve always insisted on holding them as they died; I wanted them to be calm and in the arms of someone who loved them.
{{{{{{{{{{{{ladyfoxfyre}}}}}}}}}}}}}
That is so sad. I’m very, very sorry they had your cat put down, especially without telling you first!
Sorry Magdalene, she had diabeter, urinary tract disease, obesity, and an array of other diseases. I posted under extreme stress at the time. “They” being my mother and her friend. Thanks for the hugs everybody, I really appreciate it.
I can relate, ladyfoxfyre. When we moved to Europe for 3 years, my mom gave my cat to my aunt without telling me while I was out of town. I remember my last words to him were “I’ll see you when I get back”. He ran away from her place and I never saw him again. I was only 9. I still cry about it.He was MY cat, in every sense, and meant the world to me. I still wish we could have brought him overseas with us. I still regret losing him that way, and my parents have told me that they still feel horrible for doing that to me. But I understand their reasons. They thought it was the best thing at the time.
And when my dog died - I was at school when they had to bring him to the vets, and although I said “bye” to him when I left the house that morning, its not the same. They did what they could to save him, and even called us to tell us to drive over to say goodbye, but he died before we even left the house. I miss that poor puppy so much (he was only 2 1/2 and we never found out what killed him). At least my last memory of him is of him standing at teh door, wagging his tail and sticking his tongue out the way he did… its a happy one. He wasnt sick that morning. Something happened later in the day. He didn’t suffer long.
I have other pets now - two cats and another dog. It helps, you know. It kinda replaces the emptyness a little, because although its definitely not the same animal, it fills up that part of your daily routine. We got the new dog only 3 days later…and I love him as much as I did the first one, and I love my cats like crazy.
Great, now I’m crying. And I’m living away from home too, so I can’t even see my pets at the moment. I’m sorry if all this just made it worse for you - I just wanted to say that I can relate and I’m sorry for your loss.
{{{{{{laydyfoxfyre}}}}}}
It’s terribly sad that you didn’t get to say goodbye. I’m so sorry about that. It’s so important to be able to have some closure, and it sucks when you don’t get it.
Try not to focus on how much longer she could have lived if you’d made special efforts. Every cat owner is different, and everyone makes different decisions. But as for me, I lost one cat to kidney disease the long, hard, drawn out way. When my next cat got it, I asked the vet to put her to sleep before she had to undergo all the subcutaneous fluids, the food the hated, the pills she loathed, the restriction on her movement to keep her from peeing everywhere. Yes, she could have lived a lot longer, and she actually looked like a pretty healthy cat, but her quality of life wasn’t the same and would only get worse. The vet said it was a brave and hard thing to do, but that she respected it immensely. I bawled like they were ripping my heart out, which they were. But I think it was right.
Your kitty went out while still in decent shape–and that’s (on some level) a blessed thing, although it’s heart-wrenching to lose her before you were ready.
I too lost a cat to kidney disease/failure. He was part blind but he was the sweetest thing in the world. He would try to catch bugs in the front yard even though he could barely see them. The last day I saw him he was sneaking around at the edge of the woods and I went up to him, kissed him on the forehead, and said “I love you Sammy, I’ll see you when I get back from school”. They put him to sleep while I was at school, so I didn’t get to say goodbye to him either. I cried for days and days about that. I’m still crying right now.
Thanks you guys. I really appreciate hearing from you guys.
{{{{{{{{{ladyfoxfyre}}}}}}}}} Sorry
Isnt it crazy how these animals get into our hearts and lives so much? And the people who have never owned a pet just don’t understand. Even some who do have pets - they don’t get it, at least not until it happens to them. It really is like losing a family member. It’s comforting to know (even for me, after so many years) that there are a lot of people who can relate and know what it’s like.
ladyfoxfyre, I am so sorry. There are so few things in life like the sudden, unexpected loss of a loved one.
Something somewhat similar happened to me a few years ago. My mother owned a poodle, Cherie, who she got when I was in the fifth grade (1980). By the time I was married and out of the house, Cherie was not doing well–she had cataracts, hip dysplasia, and kidney problems. But whenever I came over to the house, she was thrilled to see me. She would trot over and sit in my lap every time. I suspect nobody else at the house played with her or paid a lot of attention to her.
One day, I found out casually from my mother that she had had Cherie put to sleep. Granted, it was a difficult decision for her, and she couldn’t bear to take her herself; she had her boyfriend take her after she said goodbye. I was so upset that I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye myself, and I was upset with my mother for some time.
As many Dopers know, we also recently lost a cat while he was under anesthesia for a routine dental cleaning. It was very difficult for us. The only thing that makes it better is rejoicing in the time he spent with us and remembering what a great cat he was.
Best Friends Animal Sanctuary, in Utah, has a memorial page for pets that have passed on. Maybe you could send in pictures of your cats, and share what wonderful pets they were with animal lovers everywhere. (Our Sunshine is memorialized there.)
Until then, have as long a cry as you need to.
pldennison, that’s a wonderful idea.
Sorry if my posts have been a bit sloppy and hard to understand, I’m not really thinking straight and the keyboard is a bit blurry.
Thanks again everybody.
ShibbOleth, long time no see.
I too want to express my condolences. I really feel for you. My cat is not doing well and I was pretty much prepared to put him down a week ago but my vet suggested giving him a little more time. He has cancer and his days are numbered. He is on an IV for 10 minutes a day and has been given a steroid shot to boost his appetite. All in all though, he appears to be doing a little better than he was. He is being massively spoiled right now and eats better than me:) steak, shrimp, turkey, vanilla ice cream, you name it. When it is time, I will take him to be put down without hesitation and I will be devistated. The fact is though, there is no easy way to do this, regardless of the circumstances. Every day will get a little easier. Take care!
I’m sorry to hear about it. I don’t qquite know what to say – I don’t have any reassuring words. I can only share in your frustration and loss.
Oh, honey, that’s terrible. I’m sorry!
(((ladyfox