Ummmm, because I just got here??? And it’s important to me? Maybe if more people would realize that some of us aren’t just PURPOSELY meandering across the street because we think it’s fun to mess with the drivers, but because we actually have a valid reason (yes, even if we don’t have obviously gnarled joints or whatever it is they need to see to have it proved to them that the person IS truly in pain and can’t move faster), a LOT fewer people would get all snarky and quit with the dirty looks and such.
If you’ve only just got here, it behooves to read the friggin’ thread and see that it’s been addressed before.
You are not saying anything that Ambivalid has not argued against over and over again in this thread and others.
You’re not going to change his mind with your legitimate reason for wanting/needing to use the facilities, all you’re going to do is tread the same ground that has been tread a thousand times before.
People who aren’t knee-jerk dickwads will realise that some people have illnessess and disabilities that can’t be seen. People who aren’t self-centred fuckspackles out to do only what’s convenient for themselves will realise sometimes that people who actually are in need get sick of being inconvenienced by people who are self-centred fuckspackles, and sometimes jump to conclusions a bit rapidly. But you’re all talking at a series of brick walls here and driving this thread further into the ground.
Ok, you just read whatever you want in what I post and conveniently ignore what I am saying. And I haven’t been hostile to anyone, so I don’t understand where this is coming from.
See, for those who regularly deal with these issues, a question like mine is absolutely nothing to get upset about and is completely understandable. Completely. And this has been shown to me by the reactions-in the very few number of times it’s happened-of the disabled people who actually received this question from me. The only people who ever get upset are the people who don’t have any reason to be in there in the first place and are just getting defensive. Oh and anonymous characters on the internet.
I never said you were getting hostile, I said you’ve argued against the “but what about people with invisible disabilities?!” Point before. I didn’t say what you’ve argued, just that you’ve addressed it over and over again.
What I said was that people who aren’t fuckwits on either side will understand where the other side is coming from and don’t need to be lectured. People who are pricks will continue to try to justify their actions and will ignore or handwave attempts to shame them, which makes the constant, endless arguing an exercise in mutaully hostile masturbation.
Oh do you now? You have superpowers of Xray vision? I would bet my next paycheck that you cannot tell from seeing me or anyone else who suffers from the same illness I do based on what it looks like when I walk out of a bathroom stall. Unless you saw me IN the bathroom stall gratefully using the handrail to lessen the pain to my knees of lowering myself to the commode, you can’t tell.
Again, this is exactly the sort of attitude I’m talking about. Why do you feel the need to grill people as they’re coming out of the stall? …“politely worded question” my butt! Why not just take it on good faith that they may have had a perfectly valid reason?
Grrrrrr, (yes, yes, I know, hornets nest and all that, but this exactly hits home). Usually I only hear the bathroom stall stuff here, but have to deal with the snarky asides and dirty looks when I take an escalator or dare to take an elevator one floor because “I’m perfectly healthy”.
Can I ask what your condition is? And why wouldn’t you be understanding? Do you not have to wait unnecessarily and with regularity too? And you can take my words on their face or not but I am polite and I am very courteous.
Tell you what, if someone is as close to me as my bag was (if I were to remove it), they’d sure as hell BETTER back off. I don’t want someone squished into my person where my bag used to be, so the bag stays ON. It’s more than just not wanting it on the icky floor, it’s a cushion between me, and people who have no clue as to how to keep personal space.
Well, seeing as the post I responded to first was on the SECOND page, what you’re saying is, to spare you from having to ignore a post on something that is now bothering you, I should have read the entire 6 page thread before being allowed to post anything. I see.
Secondly, Ambilavid isn’t the only purpose for my posting what I did, as I stated, his comments are only a small part of a bigger attitude out there against people others judge to be 'perfectly fine".
It’s frustrating and hurtful to deal with those attitudes, so where I see it, I will say something. And yes, I do say something to the snarky judgmental perps out in real life as well.
Sure, I’ll explain it, and why it might seem to be “invisible”.
I have a muscle condition called myofascitis (sp? who knows). It causes pretty severe joint type pain and my knees often give way with no warning, I can’t bend them very far (makes me sad, I used to be able to cross at my ankles and lower myself to the floor gracefully, now I can barely sit in a chair, or get up from it).
It’s caused by the fascia (that silver lining) on and in your muscle tissue, and is apparently common in women of Scandinavian descent according to my doctor. The fascia gets brittle and causes the muscle to get very hard and inflexible (and not in a good “I’m pumped” way either). My doctor described it as if it’s (the fascia) like the rigging of a ship, if you pull in one place, it gets all tight and tweaked in another.
It’s not that noticeable until I’m in a tight narrow space like an airliner aisle, or a bathroom stall. Add to the problems that my hands don’t quite grasp things properly (tiny bathroom door latches when pressed up against them because they open inward and the stall is like half a foot deep…grr). If I’m on flat ground, in a reasonably open area, I’m usually good to go. Other than the knees giving out every now and then.
But there is not a gnarled wrist nor knee in sight. Nothing on my body shows that I’ve got these issues, unless you happen to catch me trying to walk on uneven ground, or my knees are having what I call “cranky days”. Even then it appears normal until one of my knees just go away and I nearly hit the pavement (that’s always fun).
As to the understanding part, I AM totally understanding. What I DON’T condone is when people, like you seem to have, put themselves in “I’m the allowed on and NOPE he definitely looks like he’s perfectly healthy, he should be ashamed of himself” mode.
And as I said, it’s not just your situation, it’s other things, like when I’m crossing a street and I’m not as fast as the motorist thinks I should be and so he gives me that snotty look like “gee, you’re not a grandma, you’re moseying on purpose just to be a jerk”
It’s just really frustrating on a lot of levels and when I see someone who seems to be from the ‘other side’ I feel as if I need to let them know they’re wrong and why they are.
Sorry, ambien is beginning to kick in, so I better quit before this post turns all to vowels. I hope that answers your question to my post?
If you had read the thread, you would have seen your point made and argued against several times over, and perhaps realised that despite how righteous you feel, you’re pissing in the wind.
You have no special insight to add here. Ambivalid is already aware of everything you have added sofar. Reading might have illuminated you on this and saved your time and everyone else’s.
You just flat out missed my point again. But oh well, sweetie, just don’t read any posts that bore, annoy, or whatever you feel, that’s your right. And more, it’ll fix the problem of you feeling as if you have to lecture someone who’s discussing a completely different part of the thread than you were.
Yes. I’m sorry about the crap people put you through because of your condition but please don’t let that color the lens through which you view my words. I absolutely DO NOT “guilt” a person when I ask them, after they come out of the handicap stall, if all the other non-accessible stalls were occupied when they made their selection. I promise you. The way I see it, this person has probably never even seen a disabled person using the handicap stall, much less someone in a wheelchair, and their selection of the disabled stall was made with no forethought or conscious thought. Definitely not a malicious disregard for the handicapped.
You’ve obviously never been on a crowded subway before. Personal space? That’s funny.
Well that’s good and I don’t know what whatshisname is saying above. I’ve seen you look at things in new ways all the time. My point was, maybe someone reads this and thinks about it a bit next time he sees someone moseying across a road, and instead of being all impatient and fratboy better than thou, they think better of it and give the person a break.
But right now the ambien really is about to have its way and while I don’t post colorful 4 letter words or anything, they can get me to writing a bit imaginative and goofy things. so sayanara and no hard feelings!
This is a warning for you, do not call names in this forum. If you have a problem with a poster, you take it to the Pit, something you should know by now with how long you’ve been here.
I just discovered this place…looks pretty cool. AND i get to complain about these annoying people that surround me? Nice.
I work at a state university. So many things to choose…
If I hold the door open for you and you walk through it like im your personal doorman, not even saying anything or taking your hands off your phone, then dont pull an attitude when I see you 2 days later and let it slam in your face.
If I say excuse me and you move .00001 inches over, and I say excuse me again and you take more than 2.5 seconds to move im pushing your dumb ass out of the way. Your singlehandedly responsible for slowing down humanity.
When the elevator door opens and 10 people all try to exit at the same time, if you try to just forcefully push your way through the middle of the crowd I will try to trip you if it seems like no one else will get hit when you fall.
When you and your 8 friends decide to all gather around in a little crowd in the entrance of the food court entrance so no one can get by, ill make it my point to walk through the middle of your group bumping into as many of you as possible. The glares you give me because you think im inconsiderate actually make me feel better.
Dont throw a football back and forth in the 8ft wide crowded walkway, especially when there’s an empty frigging soccer field 200ft away. If im able to intercept the ball ill get over the childhood tramau of Gary Joiner taking my ball by keeping yours.
I know its a college campus near a not so great part of town, but there are some clothes that arent acceptable, even here. Those black stretch pants get seethru when stretched 5 sizes too big. If it doesnt come in your size then dont wear them. Please.
CanvasShoes, ignorance fought here. Whenever I see what appears to be an abled-bodied, non-elderly person taking their time crossing the road, I always assumed their moseying time was more important than the logjam of cars waiting them out. It never even dawned on me that there might be an underlying condition. Now, I don’t think I’ve ever gotten upset with anyone for doing that, but I’m glad to know that I’ll reconsider any judgments (harsh or otherwise) in the future. Thanks.
You touch me? You get the hat pin, grandma taught me well. (I don’t really have a hat pin). So, the only subway I’ve been on was in DC, and it wasn’t so crowded that people were squishing up against your bod. I only know from that experience so don’t know at all what it would be like (except maybe the state fair…ugh).
Where are you that it’s that bad? And how do you avoid having others touching you, or can you? Sounds like hell on earth.
Madrid or Barcelona, rush hour, the only way I know to avoid being squished all over is what Dad used to do: wait until rush hour is over or walk (he’d get home 3h after leaving work, being about half an hour away by subway). Eventually my parents moved elsewhere.