I’m talking about fan-run full on conventions, not those media run whorehouses where you stand in line for two hours to buy a $60 photo from a STAR who doesn’t even glance in your direction.
Most writers and actors are decent human beings if you treat them like anyone else.
Freaking the mundanes is fun!
If the 4 foot tall elderly skinny whisp of a is telling you something, and she has a chest full of con ribbons, you damn well better listen to her.
Never let a pirate pour your drink.
Some of the best conversations happen in the Hospitality Suite after 2 am.
Do not EVER skip a panel if Steve Barnes is a panelist.
The best stories come from con security-they’ve seen it all…and did most of it.
On that same subject, do not doubt any story you hear until you’ve gone to at least three cons, at which point you will realize the true meaning of “anything is possible”.
If mixed properly, chocolate vodka and Mountain Dew tastes like a Tootsie Roll.
From having worked at quite a few cons, I can add to the list:
The Con is always perpetually on the verge of imploding under the weight of the many crises that are going on simultaneously. If the fans never realize how close they came to destruction that day, then the Con Staff is doing its job admirably.
Don’t even THINK about running a con until:
1, You’ve worked in most(if not all) departments and
2. You’ve had a good long look at the current con-chair on the Monday after the con.
On any given day at con, you can have an awesome and popular cosplay OR you can attend the interesting panels you wanted to get to. Not both.
Likewise, you can end con in any of the following three conditions: well-rested, hung-over, or totally zombified. While Total Zombification becomes less of a desired target once you pass your mid 20s, conversely, it becomes much easier to attain.
Elevators are tools of the enemy, and stanchions/guideropes are his minions.
Never try to out-drink Spider Robinson when he’s on a roll.
Pay attention to your surroundings. You just might find yourself holding the door open for Walter Koenig. Or watching Harlan drop his pants in public. Or Sharing an elevator with Dr. Demento. Or…
You misread the pocket program-that early morning panel with Steve Barnes is “Tai Chi”, not “Chai Tea”.
Believe any and all things told about Hogan’s Goat-they were real, and they did things that would make the Dorsai Irregulars blush.
If you get to the con early, lend a hand, dammit!
From the fan side:
Cons are not about science fiction or fantasy – it’s what you talk about when you run out of anything else.
The program is only a small part of the con. But if the programming is no good, the con won’t be, either.
Don’t miss a chance to go to a party.
You can wear unusual t-shirts at a con (like this one) and people will get the joke.
Follow the wombat’s rules: At least four hours sleep and two real meals a day.
From the pro side:
SF writers at cons are approachable and willing to talk.
Keep your ears open for opportunities: I’ve had several fiction sales and may have my novels republished due to talking to people at conventions.
Never monopolize a panel. Everyone should have a chance to talk.
Moderating a panel is very easy: come up with one or two questions to start and listen to answers and follow up.
From the concom side*:
Take every opportunity to promote the convention.**
Listen to those with experience.
The more program participants, the better the con. The cost of adding a participant is minor compared to the impression that a lot of participants will be there.
Gafiate every few years.
If you’re not on the committee, but someone on the committee is especially nice to you, you are being recruited. Nancy Lebovitz said it best: “Being on a con committee has all the disadvantages of a group marriage with none of the advantages.” And “Allow me to explain about the running of science fiction conventions. The natural condition is one of insurmountable obstacles on the road to imminent disaster. Strangely enough, it all turns out well. I don’t know how. It’s a mystery.”
*I’ve been on the Albacon committee on and off since 1995, running publications, programming (9 times) and serving as con chair. I’m also was on the committee for World Fantasy Con in 2007, and am on the committee for 2015.
**Next year, Albacon will be a relaxicon, with no programming, but will be back in 2014. No convention in 2015, since we’ll be running World Fantasy Con.
The people on the ConCom know who actually runs the convention, whether their name is attached to the ConChair title, or not.
The minimum proportions at a convention should be: 1 shower, 2 meals, 3 hours of sleep per day. Do not confuse these.
Addendum to Czarcasm: if you have a good hotel negotiator, you should also not change hotels out from under them, ruining the relationship with the hotel.
Our psychic abilities: The hotel had an outbreak of Legionnaires disease about the time the con was to have been held.
But, basically, too few people had signed up.
Unofficially, the concom handed it off to a new group, who didn’t promote it very well and didn’t focus on it until it was too late. This year, the old guard returned and we managed despite changing the hotel (more Legionnaires) three months before the con.
Indyellen. Yes. Having someone who knows how to work with the hotel is absolutely essential.
BTW, if anyone is attending World Fantasy in 2015 in Saratoga, NY (I know – it’s early and the bid was just announced), I can use volunteers.
We had an anarchist protest in the park across from the hotel at Orycon last weekend, and the first thought we had was “Oh ghod-what if the Browncoats gather to mount a counter protest!”
