1). If you really want kids, just relax and don’t try so hard. It will happen.
This was also a line in Angels in the Outfield. I don’t remember the Angels winning the pennant. Also, believe in a god or not, that being has not chosen to fix the physical issues I and my wife have. So if you know not of what you speak, be silent.
2). If you think you want kids get a dog.
I will keep this in mind when you let me know you have a food dish placed in your back yard and your kids crawl to it. Also, if your child bites me, I will put it down.
3). If you think you want kids, you can have mine. They will change your mind quick.
So, you as an incompetent parent want to offer me children you don’t want? Ok, I have a family attorney that will do the paperwork. But of course your husband, wife, grandma, etc would never approve. I understand it was not serious.
I am only posting this because I have heard all three in the last three days. Feel free to add your own.