Things that you wish you could get away from but find everywhere

Inspired by the Things You Didn’t Think You’d Miss thread.

I was in Guatemala in 1992. Went from Huehuetenango out to Todos Santos Cuchumatan. Basically a dirt trail to get out to this village. We then hike up this mountain in the general direction of Mexico. We are out in the mountains, nobody around that I can see, come over a little hill and there is a little kid selling Pepsi. WTF? I remember thinking at the time, where do I have to go to get away from Pepsi or Coke. I’m sure he just saw or got word of the gringos headed his way and came over to meet us but at the time it was a real WTF moment.

In 1989 when I went to Moscow I was surprised to find Dr Pepper there. About a year after I left they opened a McDonalds in Pushkin Square. Made me kind of sad.

I saw both Coke and 7Up in North Korea though only one place selling them.

I’d like to be able to get away from people on cell phones, but I fear that even if I move into a cave, there will be some idiot in there yapping about what she should make for dinner.

“Celebrity” gossip.

American chain restaurants. In Cairo I was invited to lunch at Applebee’s. :smack::rolleyes:

Graffiti. Especially when it’s on millennia-old structures or walls. It’s everywhere.

Stole my answer.

Old people.

God, they’re everywhere! I work in a doctor’s office- there they are! I go to the grocery store, there they are! I’m trying to go faster than 30 in a 40 down a main artery of town NOT within rush hour- there they fucking are! Holy crap, “winter” in Tucson is an old person’s world!

It’s gonna get worse…a LOT worse. The first of the baby boom generation is only in its mid-sixties. :smiley:

By then I’ll be old, too, so then old people will be cool.

Cool! Me, too. :wink:

Needless people noise.

The average person seems to despise quiet, and is always seeking its annihilation. Is the room “too quiet”? Well, better bang your pop bottle against the table a few dozen times. Are people sitting quietly? Well, it’s best you make a hilarious, clever joke by yelling, “Jesus Christ everyone! Shut the hell up!” Then laugh loudly at your own cleverness. Is someone reading? They sure as hell don’t want to keep reading; that would be crazy! You’d best attempt conversation with them. Repeatedly. Do not give up. If you’re truly in danger of having to experience quiet, resort to using your cell phone. Call, text, play games, whatever, so long as it makes beeps, clicks, or chatter.

When I am God-King, these people will be shot.

(I’ll use a silencer.)

Beggars standing on offramps with signs. They make around $30 an hour, all tax free. Just for standing on the side of the road! When I’m EvilOverlord, I’m making it legal to shoot these people with paintball guns. Then it will be an actual job; paintball target.

Oh god yes! I go to the great outdoors to find a bit of piece and quiet, and without fail, there is always someone yapping away disturbing my zen-like calm.

Why, when faced with beautiful scenery, the gentle lapping of water, the susurration of leaves in the trees, or the far off trill of birds, do some people feel the need to conduct loud conversations that carry for miles?! Usually about something entirely unrelated to the magnificent vista in front of them. Why?!

Cell phones is a good one, but also any sort of device of that type. Not that all communications are bad, but 24/7 everywhere everyplace gets annoying. Interact with real people and the real world once in a while, folks.

Traffic. I hate being in traffic. But you can’t get anywhere without it. Also, road construction. Which around here is pretty much every other road. And makes traffic worse.

Obama mentions in TV shows. I’m not talking about “topical” shows like SNL or Leno or whatever, just scripted shows where if you took out the mentions, nothing at all would change storywise and there’s just no reason for Obama to be brought up. Drederick Tatum has an Obama tattoo now, woopdeewoo…:rolleyes:

Crazy sports fans. You know, the kind of people that will walk around everywhere they go wearing a hockey jersey or something like that. You look just as ridiculous wearing that to go shop at Target as someone would wearing a Star Trek uniform to go eat at Burger King (and I’ve actually seen that, believe it or not). And don’t even get me started on the nutjobs that paint their faces (or worse). It’s just a stupid game, quit treating it like it’s your religion. These nuts are everywhere, though.

BREAKING NEWS reports, where the report is some mundane weather issue, like a thunderstorm watch or snowstorm on the way. Unless it’s something emergent like a tornado it can wait until the regular news, a newsbreak during the commercials, or even be taken care of with those stupid crawls at the bottom. Stop interrupting shows just so the weatherman can spend 5 minutes blabbing and giving about 10 seconds of worthwhile info. Seems to happen a lot more than it used to, guess people used to not think the sky was falling everytime a snowflake fell or a clap of thunder hit. Worst of all, is when the cable company decides some weather non-event is an event and hijacks your cable box to “warn” you. You can’t even change the channel then, no way to get away, beyond shutting off the TV. And heaven forbid you were using a cable company issued DVR. Congrats, your recordings just got hosed.

I agree wholeheartedly, and that post (especially the punchline) made me laugh out lo… er, chuckle under my breath and grin silently to myself.

Litter. And it infuriates me. I am sure the stress has taken years off my life. I am sure if I go to the south pole at some point a cheetos bag will blow by.

And loud music on a boom box at just about any camping or outdoor recreation area.

And a specific subset of the first. Cigrarette butts.

The patriarchy. Right now, the part that’s tiring me out is how hypersexualised images of women are used to sell anything and everything, but I would love be able to jettison the whole system.

Agreed, however to me graffiti becomes interesting if (a) it’s more than a few decades old and (b) it consists of something other than a banal tag or obscenity.

I was poking around in an old chapel on the cliffs the other week and there’s loads of graffiti carved into the stone, dating back to at least the 17th century. Standing in that spot and imagining some dude etching that into the stone all those years ago was rather more edifying than waiting on a railway platform and noting that “TOX” passed this way with a spraycan in '08…

Prius mentions in books. Every “good” character now drives a Prius. Nothing against Priuses (Priii?), but it’s the new literary equivalent of a white Stetson.