Has nobody mentioned the laugh track? My god, I simply cannot stand them anymore. In the post Arrested Development era, hearing that canned laughter immediately tells me that the show must be dreck. It’s a relic of a bygone era that needs to be permanently eradicated.
Or it could just continue to serve as a big red warning label to avoid those shows. That works, too.
There should be a reality show with the following elements: fat guy working at a booth at Nascar, football games, or wrestlling matches, where he sells cubic zirconia jewelry and Rachel Ray cookware. He has a hot wife who is a fashion model. There is a laugh track, especially when he jokes about Viagra. Oh, and they have a missing child, so Nancy Grace appears on every show with “breaking news” updates. … If there was such a show, and it was cancelled, well, two thirds of our complaints would be gone.
I like the way you think! Sounds like a perfect replacement for one of the Law & Order or CSI franchises.
Fat guy needs to be John Goodman or John Madden. Hot wife maybe Katey Sagal. Anne Coulter comes in as a cleaning lady.
I disagree with this. Crap about American Idol is all over Fox when it’s on the air. It’s not accurate to say “I couldn’t care less.” I would be very happy to see it go away.
You have correctly stated my case. I would be overjoyed if American Idol, Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul, Randy Jackson and most especially Ryan Seacrest just vanished. The latest judge has arrived since I quit watching it at all. No hard feelings toward her. Test patterns or infomercials in that slot would appeal to me more. Of course I wouldn’t watch them either but at least they’d quit playing that ridiculous “music” on AI.
I’ll tell you what is on the increase that is so unnecessary – scenes that are set in the Men’s Room with guys lined up at the urinals. I so don’t want to go there.
Brit T.V All Soaps ,if you want to see the little dramas of ordinary life then look around you,or better yet try getting a life yourself.
People shows,as in am I the father of my skanker g/fs baby?
I’m so interested I think about it on the way back from the unemployment office on the way to the liquor store before I go home to her.
Make over shows for people, gardens and houses.
“Talent Shows” where the enterants are bland,unoriginal,not overly talented,totally forgettable and the winner usually is shortly after and we’re supposed to get a kick out of watching one of the judges humiliate the contestants .
Reality shows,whatever their pretext, where the whole point is to give the viewers a cheap thrill watching the ordinary members of the public be offensive,or pretend to fall out with their costarring nonentities.
House selling programmes,Escape to the country,moving abroad,making more money on your property etc.etc.
You want to know the state of the housing market then go to an estate agent or read a property guide.
Outtake shows,yes you’ve forgotten your lines or started giggling or a doorhandles loose absa fucking loutley hilarious the first two thousand times even when it wasn’t done deliberately to get the actors face on screen outside of the show.
And now you can all get off of my lawn!
When they started running “Ace of Cakes”, a show where I guy will use anything inedible for structure in his cake designs, I knew it was over.
A sarcastic cleaning lady, with all the snappy comebacks! They’ll send her for an Extreme Makeover in a Very Special episode (not that it’ll help). And we need a Wacky Neighbor who barges in all hours of the day and night - David Caruso? 
I would like to see removed those “top twenty event” type shows with C list celebrities commenting on the entries and they don’t even show the events themselves.
A specific example I can think of is “Top Twenty SNL funniest skits”. How about showing the actual skits, not just Danny Bonaduce saying how much he liked Waynes World.
I just thought of a remake in the brewing: Mr. Ed.
David Caruso as Wilbur and Ann Coulter as Mr. Ed.
Ratings bonanza. Money in the bank.
I probably wouldn’t notice if anything that’s not cartoons disappeared, the only non-cartoon I watch is the Daily Show/Colbert Report and that’s online. (Oh, and Mythbusters but I keep forgetting to turn it on).
That’s not to say I WANT all of it to disappear, just that I probably wouldn’t know that it disappeared for a few weeks (in other words “couldn’t care less”).
Caillou doesn’t seem so bad when you first watch it, but after a while you realize how whiny Caillou is. And the narrator or storyteller’s voice is grating also. By the end of the show you just want the kid to shut up, you don’t care about his hurt feelings or whatever that day. Luckily my kids never took to it either, they seemed to realize Caillou was no fun. Granted, I will still take him over Dora or some of the other mind-numbing kids shows out there. At least he is not merchandised to death (probably because kids find him boring, but still.) Nobody begs for the Caillou backpack in the store.
Where do I start?
First let me thank the TV gods for removing Dan Rather, Phil Donahue, and Rosie O’Donnell
What else can go?
basketball
golf
tennis
MSNBC
Saturday Night Live
infomercials
and the agreement that 85% of shows go to commercial at the same time - that really gets on my nerves
The Bachelor
The Bachelorette
Rachel Ray
Anne Coulter
Lou Dobbs
Every one of the dancing shows
Snugglies commericals
According to Jim
Let’s keep it simple.
Reality shows.
Is that really an agreement? I had no idea.
There is something similar that aggravates me: those morning news shows, like Today, do everything at the same time. The weather, for instance. Is that competition or an agreement?
Wow at the OP listing so many relevant entries. I agree with you on everyone.
Children in political commercials.
Celebrity (No)News shows.
To some extent ‘News Magazine’ shows piss me off because they trivialize horrible real-life events. (A kid’s murdered, and it’s played it out like a murder-mystery with dramatic music, and surprise interview with top-suspect, but only after we learn that he or she innocent). It’s tacky. (I know the family’s must be willing participants)
edit: That and “To Catch a Predator”. When you make a man come in with his pants off, that means you’ve turned into what you hate
Frankly, I’m sick to death of the stupid live-action “tweener” comedies (especially, but not limited to, ones with singing involved) that have been clogging up the schedules the last few years, but at the same time…I’m scared to death at what would rise to replace them. :eek:
No, not really. That was just my aggravation talking. But practically everyone going to commercial at almost the exact same moment is really making me contemplate going hunting for humans.