Unless my high-school art teacher was wrong, it’s always the left testicle that is lower.
Thankfully, I haven’t learned a damn thing in this thread :).
But my GF, while not ignorant of the male body (she’s a woman’s health nurse practitioner), finds it fascinating in a way that no past GFs ever have. Always checking out the penis, the scrotum, everything.
I think some things that surprised her:
– Guys nipples can be just as sensitive
– The scrotum pulls up when at “duty stations” and hangs low when cooling off
– There are dramatically different areas of sensitivity on a penis.
A lot of women think “head, shaft, what else is there to know?” Ummm, the top of the head feels different than the bottom, the top of the shaft is far less sensitive than the underside, and there’s far less sensitivity on the bottom half of the penis than the top half. The “geography” isn’t as complex as those scary alien facehugger woman parts, but it’s still there.
– Handjobs can be as effective, if not more so, than anything else. Most GF’s I have had seem to have some inherent bias against the HJ, somehow thinking that it’s “lower” on the totem pole (ahem) than intercourse, blow jobs, etc. As any man can tell you, nothing can be further from the truth. Any woman can move her hips around-- knowing the mad ninja-skills of digital manipulation of the penis is as much an art form as the BJ.
– Zippers can be pulled down by any woman, but only the owner pulls them up (Okay, not a fact-- but a damn useful and important rule).
– IME, there is no such thing as a woman who hates anal stimulation. There are only women who hate boorish, fumbling, ignorant, impatient and insensitive lovers.
– Guys like it, too. (Nerves are nerves, wherever they are).
Wait, there is one woman-related thing that I learned (or rather, had reinforced).
For a long time, I just didn’t know how much variation there was in how wet women got during foreplay/sex. Some women get really wet on a dime, others take far longer to get there, and some never get wet at all (thus, the need for lube). And yes, I’m talking women who were into me, properly warmed up and horny, etc.
I’ve also learned that birth control can have a lot to do with this. I’ve seen studies that allege quite a few differences in this area between women on the Pill/women who aren’t. In my personal experience, I have to say that the Pill really kinda screws up sex in comparison to the women I’ve been with who haven’t been on it. Different wetness, smells, tastes, levels of horniness, etc. Totally anecdotal, I know, but intuitively, it makes sense to me-- these are important hormones that are getting messed up here, after all.
Weird stuff.
That can be uncomfortable if one’s sack has a more or less normal amount of hair on it. If one shaves, then it gets to be a downright nuisance. And the public unsticky dance for me usually involves me adopting a wide stance while leaning a bit to one side. The challenge to this is to be efficacious while still looking cool. Or at least not like a TOTAL dork.
I just proved (to myself, anyway) that your art teacher was wrong. Maybe he was checking in a mirror and got confused.
More disturbing, I just found out that I’m a right wingnut.
Maybe they think women just change tampons every time they pee. This is not an unreasonable assumption: I pee about three times a day, and the ladies here seem to be saying that a tampon’s good for about 8 hours, so changing it every time you pee would work out just about right.
I checked, and my left is lower, but while I was checking the right started doing a little yo-yo move up and down, maybe timed with my pulse or something? Those boys, always up to something!
Good lord. I pee at least 7-8 times a day. If I had strong coffee in the morning it can be every half hour through early to mid-afternoon. Do you not drink anything? 
God, I wish. It’d be a tenth as unpleasant as it is if there was some sort of sphincter to allow us to control things.
So, guys…tell me more about the design of pants. You really don’t have to worry about sitting on your balls? I figured you almost never did because you have a lot of practice sitting correctly by this point.
The fabric of your underwear and pants will stop the balls from really getting “lower” than your thighs and butt checks. At best, it will be at the same level as them. Even if they hit the chair first, there’s nothing “on top” pressing back down, so the chair will just gently push them back up a bit and then your ass and legs hit the chair. It would take work to get a ball underneath your thigh.
We’re mostly sitting on our butt cheeks and the area between our asshole and balls, not on our balls. If anything it’s more like the balls are sitting on the chair in front of us, but as long as your pants seam is close it will hold the balls up a bit. If we sit down with our knees together, that tends to squeeze things. Also, the balls aren’t as ultra-sensitive as some ladies seem to think. They don’t like getting hit hard, but minor squeezing and impacts doesn’t necessarily hurt.
We had “Health” class every year in the 1960s in public school Georgia in the younger grades, supplanted by Biology sections in Science and eventually in 7th grade by a whole year of just Biology. There was some snickering when we got to THAT system of the human body, but the material was taught. Let’s see, specifics… between 3rd and 7th grade:
NOT TAUGHT
• erections
• that it — at any time, to anyone —FEELS GOOD
• that there is an appetite or drive associated with it, as opposed to a cerebral decision to reproduce
TAUGHT
• ovaries, fallopian tubes, ova, cervix, uterus, uterine walls, FSH, LH, monthly periods, impregnation, umbilicus, trimesters, labor, birth;
• testes, spermatozoa, vas deferens, prostate, penis, ejaculation, XX versus XY chromosomes, meiosis versus mitosis;
• Intrauterine devices (IUDs), condoms, the Pill, the rhythm method, the diaphragm. Other stuff wasn’t around or didn’t get much attention. Hmm, maybe also tubal ligation and vasectomy.
• vaginal delivery, c-section, the muscles of the uterine wall, cervical mucosa, ectopic pregnancy, vacuum aspiration (suction) abortion, dilation & curettage, dilation and extraction. Fetal circulation. Rh Factor. Apgar score. Encomium (sp?) stools. Ecclampsia and preecclampsia.
For a good score in 7th grade biology you’d need to know the basics of how to give someone an abortion!
ETA: no girl/boy separation, either. All in the same classroom, always.
I wear underpants. I’m no more likely to sit on my balls than you are to accidentally slam your pocketbook closed on your tits. I dont understand the “dress to the left, or dress to the right” tailor thingie either. I don’t have my guyparts dangling down either pants leg, sheesh! It’s all supported and kind of cradled together more in front than down. I guess it might be true of guys who wear boxers. Sounds spectacularly uncomfortable though.
Walking around naked, there’s still no chance of sitting on anything but while standing up the balls can get sort of partway behind a leg which feels weird and requires plucking it off the edge of the thigh.
Why not? For us, everything exits from the one same uberhole. What do you mean plugged up? Can’t you guys have sex while pregnant?
And yeah, I always figured if a tampon was bloody and wet when you had to pee, you’d just discard it and put in a new one. Otherwise, take it out, pee, and put it back in. Kinda like a stick-in diaper.
Enforced natural selection at work, my friend. Can’t learn to wear pants = no breeding rights.
At least in theory.
It sadly doesn’t really work in the real world.
You say that like you believe it’s not possible to slam your tit in something. It is. It is.
Put it back in? Do they teach guys anything about sex ed beyond how to hide an untimely erection behind a math book?
This is why I’m a big believer in, uh, hands-on learning.
They don’t teach us how to use a tampon.
Our parts are different, don’t they teach girls anything in sex ed?
From what I’ve gathered, though, there’s an… insterty thing.
Glad to hear that this happens to someone else. My balls do that, and it’s really weird. Every once in awhile, I’ll be sitting and looking at my balls, as is my custom, and they start moving around like an animatronic Abe Lincoln.
Agree, but I don’t like the sound of that. My balls themselves don’t seem delicate; but the complex wiring, pneumatic tubes, cams, levers and data buses between my balls and the base of my penis seem very sensitive, and I’ve never had an enjoyable experience when someone was actively increasing the pressure in that area. (Negative pressure, however, is not all that unpleasant).
Your cervix (at the upper end of your vagina) closes up completely when you’re pregnant. Helps to keep the baby from making an early arrival. So yes, you can have sex while you’re pregnant and I hear tell that near the end, men sometimes get squicked out about poking their soon to be born child in the head. 
And there’s no way to re-use a tampon once it’s been inserted for more than a few minutes. For one…that’s gross…and secondly, they expand. And without the plastic applicator to get it in you, it’s a bit more difficult.
My periods suck majorly. They last seven days and only two of those days are ‘light’. The first and last day. I have to double up on the overnight pads when I sleep AND use wads of toilet paper in strategic locations in the front and back because it gets everywhere at night. Fun times! And I also know from experience, unprotected sex right after your period is over, is so not ‘safe’. Ignorance begets baby.