Nothing is impossible.
They ain’t sayin’ it right.
Just wait until you have your own kids.
My mother: “if you want to find something, start cleaning up.”
Dad: “that’s merely corroborative detail, intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative.”
Mom: “comb your hair, it looks like a birch broom in a fit.”
Both: “Don’t marry that tramp.”
(…I should have followed that advice.)
Dad: If you do what you think is right regardless of the result, I’ll always be proud of you.
From my dad: It’s always easier to back into a space than to back out of it.
Never walk behind a truck backing up.
And always put your car keys in your pocket, and your hand on the keys, as you lock your car door, and you’ll never lock yourself out.
Why yes, he was a car guy; why do you ask?
No pithy catchphrases, but here’s the essence of what they taught me that stuck.
“You have to be able to take care of yourself, and not depend on a man to take care of you.”
“Live your own life, don’t worry about what other people think about you, but don’t show off. Keep a low profile to ward off envy.”
“Education is the best investment.”
I’m 62. In rural areas in the 1960’s, not many people were giving this kind of practical advice on education and indepence to their daughters.
My dad started telling me this as soon as I was old enough to listen. It’s served me well for my entire life.
My mom is a devout Christian and has done extensive bible study. One day I read Corinthians and phoned her:
Me: “I’m going to hell.”
Her: “No you’re not.”
Me: “Well according to this Saint Paul guy in Corinthians I am.”
Her: “Ohhh no no no. Paul’s no damn “saint”. He used to be SAUL. He was persecuting Christians left & right, throwing them into the lion’s pit and whatnot. Then he found religion and became fanatical. So don’t go falling for any of that shit.”
Me: “Thanks mommy. :)”
This is the one that stuck for me.
I’m 31.
After a failed relationship my father said, “I’m proud of you. My girl don’t take no shit”
Right and I never will.
My mother: "If you are going to make any improvement in your life, you must do it today. Otherwise, you will wake up one day and find that you are 35 years old. "
Growing up, I was always told, “Art is a great hobby, but you’ll never make any money at it.” And for the longest time I believed them. Eventually, though, my wife encouraged me to get back into art, and I now make more money than almost anyone on my family. Suck it, fam.
And another:
I asked my mother why my grandfather died of a sudden heart attack, and she told me that it was probably because he ate too much salt. As a result, I pretty much stopped putting salt on anything. Now, at 46, I started having blood pressure issues- basically, if I worked out at all I’d get light-headed and faint. According to my doctor, I don’t get *enough *salt in my diet.
Yeah, from my mom:
“If you don’t lose weight, you’ll never get a boyfriend.”
She was wrong, but it’s still with me even 25 years later. Ugh.
My dad, on the other hand, is always positive. He underwent a big change when my boyfriend passed away a couple of years ago. I can’t tell you his exact words, but he went from a stance of ‘why are you crying’ to ‘it’s okay to just cry sometimes.’ This was a huge thing for me.
“Life’s not fair” was a favorite of my mom’s and it drove me absolutely bugshit crazy. (Still does, but it’s the damned condition of the universe, ain’t it?)
“Assume makes an ass out of you and me!”
“They can’t take away your education.”
“Always get ready for tomorrow today.” Basically means to have everything you need the next morning ready the night before.
“Do not let other people determine how you will act.”
Well yes, but It seems that most of the time when it’s used people are saying it to try to justify their own jerkish behavior.