You forgot to mention that the Central Valley is also the Methamphetamine Capital of the World.
If the driver finds that he needs to ford a stream, you are probably not on the interstate anymore. Turn back.
If the clerk in the all-night market tells you you look horrible when you’re buying coffee, you’ve been driving too late into the night.
A Denny’s isn’t a good place to eat, but the signs are easy to spot. Once you get to one, drive around the block and look for a local place to eat.
If you do cross a stream, try not to run over any rabbits. Your wife will complain for months.
Try to avoid Eastern Washington. You might want to try it at least once, but after that it becomes pretty boring. Actually, the same goes for the eastern halves of most western states. Montana, Oregon, Colorado, Utah, Wyoming…it’s eerie.
Maryland has totally evil speed traps and really overzealous highway patrol officers. Don’t speed. At all.
I, personally, love the Peach Butt in Gaffney, SC. Have a photo of it and everything!
If you’re descending into Helena, Montana from the west, for God’s sakes, slow down! Especially if it’s winter. The road may not look steep, but it’s extremely tricky.
The Million Dollar Highway in southwestern Colorado is worth having to drive at 30 mph.
Don’t try to drive from Cleveland to St. Louis in one day during early March. You’ll have snow problems, and God knows where you’ll end up having to spend several hours (Brazil, Indiana, most likely).
Northwestern Georgia is incredibly beautiful. Only a few times in my life have I seen such beautiful pine forests.
If you’re driving through Yellowstone National Park (as opposed to having it be a destination), add 6 to 8 hours to your travel allowance. Especially during the summer.
Watch out for aggressive ducks at rest stops in northern Alabama.
The Oregon coast is the most beautiful place on Earth. Make an effort to get south of Newport. You’ll thank me later.
Skip southwestern Washington altogether, unles you’re a big fan of clearcuts. Almost completely depressing.
If you want to stay at B&B’s, make every effort to make reservations in advance, because some places (and by this I mean southwestern Washington) just don’t have many B&B’s.
Sandpoint, Idaho is really charming. And has some really excellent restaurants. But stay away from the Mexican place (Jalapeno’s).
The 17-Mile Drive in Carmel, California is the most overrated drive on the face of the planet. Unless you really like golf.
I had some responses to the other posts in this thread, but I think what I’ve already posted is more than enough. 
Powdered sugar donuts and a pop will give you about a three hour jolt. Good if you’re driving straight through cross-country.
I learned that I can sleep with one eye open at a rest stop in Kentucky. That was when I woke up to find a guy standing in front of our car, studying us in a not very friendly way. Sitting up quickly and snarling at strangers makes them go away. Still worth it to drive through the mountains at dawn.
You can tell you’ve left Michigan without even seeing a “Welcome to Ohio” sign because suddenly, the pavement is smooth and the drivers are civil.
Does Stuckey’s still sell praline candy? They used to sell chocolate, maple, and coconut pralines. They were so sugary that it was like eating pure sugar. [drooling …]
A good question, Medievalist2. I was so psyched to see the pecan logs that I didn’t look for pralines.
They probably do, though. There was a metric assload of candy at the place I stopped at on the way home from the Outer Banks.
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As Pammipoo said, Virginia and Pennsylvania never end.
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Upstate New York in the spring is beautiful.
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Never ever try to cross Canada on Queen Victoria day weekend.
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If you get pulled over in Canada, the I thought the 100km sign meant 100 mph excuse can serve to get you ticket reduced. This works really well if you drawl.
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Tickets received in Canada don’t show up on your record in the states.
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Once you are in Quebec, not that many people speak English.
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The accent in Montreal is a lot easier to understand than the accent in a small town where you are stopping for gas and trying to get directions to a store.
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People in small towns everywhere are really friendly. Most everyone I met was helpful.
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CD collections are kind of useless on a long trip. After the first day, I had already listened to everything I wanted to listen to and just stuck to the radio.
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A cell phone with free long distance is a great travel aid.
My ex and I took a five month road trip across the USA. Check out http://www.azwebpages.com/carrtrek for our travel diary. It was written daily and is kinda humorous.
Here are some travel tips for husbands and wives:
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Apologize for all the bad things you will do, like being snappy, grumpy, and stupid. Do this BEFORE you leave.
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If one of you has an issue with low blood sugar, keep marshmallows close at hand. They work wonders.
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If you travel with a pet, don’t offer any information about it to motels. What they don’t know won’t hurt them.
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Those stupid games you played as a kid to pass time on the road will also work for adults.
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If you need to poop before you get on the road for the day, but are having troubles, have a cup of coffee and a smoke.
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Change your socks.
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If your travel partner rolls down the window, don’t argue. Those Taco Bell beans might be kicking in.
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Wave at kids riding in other vehicles. They love it.
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If traveling in the south, see who can spot the Waffle House sign first. You must say as quickly as possible, “Waff Luh Haus” to win. Keep a running tally.
Jim Carr
http://www.azwebpages.com/carrtrek
Speed when the truckers speed. If they are all doing 55, better slow down.
Don’t let Rasa navigate. Texarkana is close to 400 miles from the nearest side of the Texas Panhandle.
I’ve learned that if you’re bored, driving through rural Georgia,
and you say-innocently-as you’re passing a farm;
“I just love silos. I don’t know what it is about them. They’re just very pleasing to the eye…”
The other passengers WILL ask when you last got laid…
Don’t speed on the Ohio Turnpike.
Do not exit 696 in Detroit until you’ve at least passed 8 Mile.
Double-check directions from Mapquest.
Agree on music before you leave. Do not drive with a Britney Spears fan if you are an Avail fan.
Make reservations if you plan on stopping in a big city or tourist attraction. (big= <75,000, or any of the metropolitan areas).
If someone has to go to the bathroom, let them. It’s much more pleasant than the alternative.
Put towels over leather seats.
Traveling Texas …
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It takes abso-freaking-lutely FOREVER to drive from Amarillo to McAllen (check a map…it’s like driving from New York to Jacksonville).
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Do NOT eat Mexican food in ANY OTHER STATE. The stuff in other states just isn’t RIGHT, and the stuff in Texas is MUCH less likely to give you the shunninig rits…
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No matter how bad the roads are, they will be much worse, when riding a hardtail chopper. All highway engineers, and road crew should be required to ride a hundred mile stretch, in the same manner, once a month, as a condition of their employment.
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There is no good coffee on the road, unless you personally see the waitress make a new pot. Apparently McD’s does not follow the ‘dump after 30 minutes’ rule, anymore.
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I haven’t found a correlation between prices=service+amenities in Hotels/Motels. Some of the cheapest ones actually have a laundry, good food, and coffeepots in the rooms, while the more costly ones have none of that, and invisible staff. Be very firm on wake-up call times, and if not followed, refuse to pay extra. (Just in case your travel alarm didn’t work, and you weren’t woken up by people running back and forth in the halls, and slamming doors.)
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Side roads are the most fun, if you have the time. There are more good people than bad. To think that Charles Kuralt got paid to do that…
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A laptop can make up for many other things lacking. Especially if you go into withdrawel after a couple of days, and there’s no internet cafe to be found.
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The people in Denny’s really don’t care if you’re wearing no make-up, and your hair is a mess. They’ve seen worse. Much worse.
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Truck drivers can be your best friends, or your worst enemies. I like to be friends.
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Some chain stores/stations have consistantly cleaner bathrooms. Either stick with them, or learn to hover, and not touch anything without a paper towel.
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Want to see how strong your relationship is with someone? Travel with them.
When making a point of trying country-fried chicken in every single restaurant you stop at in a cross-country trip, you’ll discover that the first one you had was the best, and the last one you had was the worst.
Georgia is hell, until you reach the vertical bits.
If you’re tall and have long legs, the back seat is hell. It’s also hard to walk after sitting in the same position for the last six hours - but do it anyways.
If your skin is sensitive to the Great Yellow Face, wear long sleeves and a hat. Trust me.
Tennessee is populated by friendly people, but they’re a bit… weird.
All big cities look good at night - especially if you’re from the sticks. The charm evaporates during the day.
Atlanta is in permanent gridlock.
The Appalachians are utterly breathtaking to someone whose idea of high elevation lies around 350 feet above sea level.
Do not play I-Spy if your partner is Japanese.
I-Spy, with my little eye, something beginning with B
Bridge? No.
Brake? No.
Bus? No.
Er, Bike? No.
{10 minutes later} I give up.
Japanese partner, triumphantly: Behicle!
Crud, how’d I miss this thread for 2 weeks?
Doubling what Angel said, never speed on the Ohio turnpike. If you do, ALWAYS carry a radar detector.
When visiting Chicago, never assume you can walk into a hotel and find a room. Always call ahead.
Always load the car with CDs and food for long trips.
Bring something entertaining when driving on the Indiana turnpike, lest you slip into a trance.
Make it a point to get off at the correct exit when visiting New York City.
When someone attempts to drag race you in the Bronx, ignore them. Don’t let your friends encourage them.
Take a train when you can.
The Ohio countryside, at night, with snow, just before Christmas, looks pretty in a Norman Rockwell sort of way.
Detroit, with snow, just after Christmas, is even more depressing than usual.
There’s an unusual amount of roadside pornography stores between Harrisburg and State College, PA.
Roadside farmers’ markets are a great place to buy Jersey tomatoes.
Driving with a friend is ALWAYS better than driving alone. 
Crud, how’d I miss this thread for 2 weeks?
Doubling what Angel said, never speed on the Ohio turnpike. If you do, ALWAYS carry a radar detector.
When visiting Chicago, never assume you can walk into a hotel and find a room. Always call ahead.
Always load the car with CDs and food for long trips.
Bring something entertaining when driving on the Indiana turnpike, lest you slip into a trance.
Make it a point to get off at the correct exit when visiting New York City.
When someone attempts to drag race you in the Bronx, ignore them. Don’t let your friends encourage them.
Take a train when you can.
The Ohio countryside, at night, with snow, just before Christmas, looks pretty in a Norman Rockwell sort of way.
Detroit, with snow, just after Christmas, is even more depressing than usual.
There’s an unusual amount of roadside pornography stores between Harrisburg and State College, PA.
Roadside farmers’ markets are a great place to buy Jersey tomatoes.
Driving with a friend is ALWAYS better than driving alone.