I never realized that my ears are different from most people’s until I tried a pair of ear buds when they first came out. They kept falling out of my ears and I thought: What a stupid product. But then I noticed that my son had no problem keeping them in. After looking more closely at his and then at mine in the mirror, I realized that I don’t have that “cup” that keeps things like earplugs from falling out of them. And then I suddenly realized why I always had problems all those years with said earplugs when on the rifle range. Now I always look at people’s ears; it’s like an obsession.
Monokel, mein Herr:
Pah, a monocle with a strap is for sissies. Real men wear theirs by muscle force:
Earbuds are not something I use. The first version was just a single plug made of soft plastic that stuck in your ear canal, with a wire that plugged into a transistor radio. Guess how clean those stayed - not clean at all.
Hearing aids. Can’t see myself using them, though they might be helpful. I’d rather walk around with an amplifying headset on than with something stuck in my ears.
A friend of my brother had trouble hearing, my brother made him a 3D printed thing to wear on his head that had a couple of cups behind the ears, to better gather in the sound. He loves it and doesn’t care how dopey it looks because it works so well. I doubt I could be so unselfconscious.
I’ve always thought human ears looked kind of unsightly and out of place with the rest of the aesthetic. Like, “let me slap this hunk of cartilage on the side of the head and sneeze violently while I Salvador Dali my way into shaping it.” But that’s a me thing I think.
I do wonder why detached and attached ear lobes are a thing. I figured evolution would have selected for one by now and the other be a rare occurrence.
Why? What advantage does either type provide over the other, either in helping a person stay alive or in helping that person reproduce?
Because if there’s no such advantage, then evolution doesn’t care, and isn’t going to do any selecting.
Salvador Dali - exactly right! So much of what he did looks to be inspired by those three dimensional French curves that must have some acoustic wave-focusing purpose that, coupled with how the brain interprets sound, build a map of where individual sources are located and aid in segregating them in the overall sound environment. I’m not sure we fully understand how the curves and ridges in the ear work or whether their shape is really optimal for the task; they may just serve to echo the vibrations in a random way the brain must learn over time to turn into a sound picture. I bet Dali studied all kinds of ears, human and animal. They are kind of weird when you think about it.
Whether you wind up with attached lobes may just be a random thing that happens during gestation, when the ears and the skin on your head are both developing, depending on how fast one section grows and in some cases connects with another. (My guess, could be completely loco.)
I have ears. They’re pretty awesome. I can wiggle them quite well, even separately if I try hard enough. I used to entertain my students by wiggling them. I remember one time when I had kids on one side of the room saying I was wiggling them and the other side arguing that I wasn’t. Of course, I was moving just my right one.
As to earlobes and their shape:
The purpose of earlobes (and the ear as a whole) besides hearing is for amorous nibbling. The hanging lobes are better in this regard than the attached ones.
This is true. The human race just has not had enough time for the selective pressure of those that like their earlobes nibbled to have made extinct those genes that code for not enjoying earlobe nibbles.
That said, we have a number of fairly weird looking features. Genitals, both male and female are really not aesthetically appealing. I mean, yes, I like my own, and I like seeing other people’s naughty bits well enough, but they are not what I would describe as beautiful in either sex. The view usually leads to some form of procreation - so that’s why I am interested, while my view of someone’s ear is more likely when I am bored in a meeting and looking at the clock.
Me, I want pointy ears. Always have, always will.
If you have a hearing loss great enough to warrant hearing aids, you get used to having something stuck in your ears.
Once you have experienced the difference between what you hear normally vs what amplification can do, it’s a no-brainer.
Suppose you need glasses. If the thought of something resting on the bridge of your nose gives you the willies, would you forget about vision correction? Especially if you have experienced how much more you can see with that correction?
I’m at the other end of the spectrum. I am approaching the day when the audiologist says, “I’m sorry. There is nothing more I can do for you.”
~VOW
A tad creepier:
That song got it all wrong. My mother-in-law explained it really referred to boobs.
Unfortunately, she explained this when I was recovering from a very difficult childbirth. Complete with demonstration (using her arms, you perverts!). I blame her for the stitch that tore loose.
As far as ears themselves: They are quite useful for holding up eyeglasses for those of us who hate contact lenses. They are useful to keep hair out of my eyes (assuming my hair is long enough to take advantage of such). They help guide anyone who wants to whisper a secret - imagine the embarrassment if you told a secret to someone’s neck, or eyeball! If you start a secret society, of which membership requires the ability to wiggle one’s ears, it’s a fantastic way of signaling membership, in public, without any outsiders being able to figure it out. They’re useful as a way of sporting bling that does not get in the way of daily activities, unlike rings and bracelets.
My grandmother-in-law’s ears could have been used, by a reasonably observant witness, to nail her for any heist she might have committed: one of them looked fairly normal, but the top part of the other one was completely flat - no ridge / curved over bit at all. Looked like someone had ironed it.
I do think that the Great Designer / Flying Spaghetti Monster / Deity of your choice really dropped the ball when it comes to human ears and functionality. Swivelling would really be a useful skill (like cats / dogs, as someone mentioned). Ours are sessile (except for us members of the Ear-Wiggling Society). They also really get in the way when sleeping, if you’re a side-sleeper like me. The first 10 minutes after I wake up, the sound in that ear is muffled unless I remember to tug on the earlobe to reopen the canal. And what’s with the inability to clean out excess earwax without risking damage! One might argue that this shortsighted design is intended to support the manufacturers of Q-tips, but I am pretty sure humanity as a whole predates Johnson & Johnson. And if you DO get water in there to clean out that wax (or just because you went for a swim), odds are you wind up with an ear infection.
Please tell me I’m not the only one who read that last word minus its second letter!! I was wondering just what kind of meetings your office had!!
Ah, a couple of lighthearted replies. You see, ears is not all sober deliberation.
I’d like to go on record, as a few have brought it up, as believing the risks of cleaning out ears is overstated. One does it with care, of course, but the old childhood admonition, “never put anything sharper than your elbow in your ear”, is silly and incidentally, you can’t do it (put your elbow in your ear that is, go ahead and try).
I think that was the point. I.e., “don’t put anything in your ears.” Certainly not an approach I personally approach. I put all kinds of things in my ears. But that’s a story for another day.
Why did the kids put beans in their ears?
No one can hear with beans in their ears.
After a while the reason appears.
They did it cause we said no.
- Never Say No (The Fantasticks)
Your doctor can always flush out your ears with plain old ordinary water, if you feel like you get too much wax in them. I’ve had that done before. (In fact, at my yearly physical, I think I’ll ask him to again).
Trust me, if you’ve ever had too much wax in your ears, you’d know. It’s painful.
Your comment “I still clean out my ears but they always still feel to me like they should be cleaner” reminds me of people who can’t stop washing their hands.
I do hope you’ve talked to a counselor about this. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could use hearing aids, or stop thinking about ears, or not be obsessing over ear wax, yours and others’?
I can assure you, it’s very liberating. Now excuse me, I’m going to pour myself a drink and sit and not think about any of my body parts…